FBCrush Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 I will start from the beginning...I have a friend on facebook that I have not seen in several years, as he is good friends with my ex. We used to see each other regularly when I was dating my ex. But over the last several years we have lost touch and he moved to another state to obtain an MBA. Over the past year I have noticed his friend in many of his facebook pictures (it looks as if they have become good friends while at school) I never thought much of it because he was in school with my friend several states away. Recently, their graduation picture was posted and I clicked on my crushes profile and noticed that he had just moved to the city I am in! I looked through his interests and saw that we have a lot in common. The problem is, we only have the one mutual friend in common, who has now moved even further away after their graduation. My dilemma- Should I ask my friend, who I have not talked to in a while, to try and set us up and risk that he may forget or never say anything. I am not afraid to ask my friend for an introduction, as I know he does think highly of me even after my big break up with his close friend, I am just worried that he might forget. OR should I message the crush directly and risk him thinking that I am a creeper. Also, it is obvious that he is single. I saw a comment where he mentioned needing a girlfriend. I have to make some sort of move or I will always wonder "What if..." Help!?
Crila16 Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 OMG...Are you kidding? This is an absolute no brainer. It is so hard to find a decent guy out there, and friends of friends of friends always make the best relationships. Quick story. My friend Anna was in a horrible relationship with a guy who wouldn't marry her. She wasted 2 years on him. Broke up and was single for years. One day at work, her office was moving and they hired a consultant named Tom to help out for the day moving computer records. He saw my friend and fell in love. She didn't give him the time of day. Fast forward - 2 months later. My friend Anna's friend begged her to do a tennis camp 3 hours away in Upstate NY. Anna said No. Not up for it. The week before the event, she finally gave in and went. Who was at the camp? Tom. She recognized him. They talked. Total conicidence or fate? Fast forward 1 year later, they are engaged and she's madly in love. Fate...you can't fight fate. Go for it and ask your friend to see if he'd meet up with you. You never know what could happen. 1
Author FBCrush Posted August 14, 2012 Author Posted August 14, 2012 Thanks for your insight. I got an invite on FB from a local bar for a football watching party and while scrolling through the 300+ invites, I saw him on the guest list. Random! So I was thinking I would see if he was there first and then reach out to my friend. Should I just come right out and ask my friend to set me up with him?
veggirl Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 I'd be irritated if someone I am barely friends with anymore hit me up just to use me as cupid. I say reach out to the dude on your own if you are really interested. Or go to the bar event and chat him up there. Leave your friend out of it...it's annoying to be the friend caught in the middle of a set up, IMO. I don't wanna deal with the follow up questions "does he like me?" "did he say anything?" and whatnot. And what if your friend thinks you guys would be a terrible match? Awkward.
truth_seeker Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 Facebook is such a toss up. He might get the message, he might skip over it. I suggest you go to the event and "bump" into him. Act like you are surprised to see him. You're a girl. You should be a natural at this. 1
mortensorchid Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 I would ask your friend if he/she could arrange this for you, at least let you know where he will be some Saturday night. Do not, however, let him/her say something like "be brave, you ask him out". They are deflecting the ball and putting it in your court, then you will be the chaser. If the friend does not want to do it, then you're really hung out to dry there.
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