Matt145 Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Me and my ex split up 8 weeks ago we was together 2 years, she told me that she just didnt want a relationship and wanted to be single ect so we went NC she broke it several times over the 8 weeks. She texted me last night saying " I hate you " i made a thread about it and i got advice which told me not to text her back, i always listen to advice off people on LS and this is the only time i havent. I didnt text her all last night but today i woke up and i thought that it would be best if i confronted her because i knew in my head it would make me feel better and it has turned out for the good( i think ). So it turns out she never even texted me it she said she deleted my number and she sent me a picture and she was telling the truth. The text was from weeks ago but it only just came through last night because my network has been ****, just my luck! So we talked for a bit and she told me she just wants to be friends and nothing more. She told me she doesnt feel the same anymore she said she loves me but doesnt feel the passion. This really gave me the closure i think i needed it hurt me really bad but i know it will help me and it made me glad that i texted her because knowing this i can move on from now and not think she will come back. She also said she misses sex with me, and she said she would want to be friends with benefits. I said no but it killed me to say no because im very very sexualy attracted to her but i still have massive feelings for her and with me being 17 its not like i can just easily have sex with another girl my age. So out of all the conversation that is the only thing what has really hurt me i just feel like crap now because im missing out on sex with her, will this turn out good in the end for me saying no to her. When im over her im planning on asking her to be FWB.
AlexCross Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Me and my ex split up 8 weeks ago we was together 2 years, she told me that she just didnt want a relationship and wanted to be single ect so we went NC she broke it several times over the 8 weeks. She texted me last night saying " I hate you " i made a thread about it and i got advice which told me not to text her back, i always listen to advice off people on LS and this is the only time i havent. I didnt text her all last night but today i woke up and i thought that it would be best if i confronted her because i knew in my head it would make me feel better and it has turned out for the good( i think ). So it turns out she never even texted me it she said she deleted my number and she sent me a picture and she was telling the truth. The text was from weeks ago but it only just came through last night because my network has been ****, just my luck! So we talked for a bit and she told me she just wants to be friends and nothing more. She told me she doesnt feel the same anymore she said she loves me but doesnt feel the passion. This really gave me the closure i think i needed it hurt me really bad but i know it will help me and it made me glad that i texted her because knowing this i can move on from now and not think she will come back. She also said she misses sex with me, and she said she would want to be friends with benefits. I said no but it killed me to say no because im very very sexualy attracted to her but i still have massive feelings for her and with me being 17 its not like i can just easily have sex with another girl my age. So out of all the conversation that is the only thing what has really hurt me i just feel like crap now because im missing out on sex with her, will this turn out good in the end for me saying no to her. When im over her im planning on asking her to be FWB. Don't be so gullible. She sent that text last night. Not weeks ago. She is giving you breadcrumbs. Its funny how the sex thing came up real quick.
Author Matt145 Posted August 13, 2012 Author Posted August 13, 2012 I dont know why she would say it though she had no reason too, shes the type to tell me straight if she does something. She had deleted my number its just wierd :S
YorickBrown Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Ahhhh...the fabled "FWB" How nice (for you)....now I know why I took a leave from LS for a couple of days <envy sinking in>... I wish my NC would also lead to an FWB...<sigh> Nways, I dunno why you would refuse a booty call like that but then strange things happen after a BU....Go on NC again...who knows...she may offer a threesome next time around:laugh:
Author Matt145 Posted August 13, 2012 Author Posted August 13, 2012 Ahhhh...the fabled "FWB" How nice (for you)....now I know why I took a leave from LS for a couple of days <envy sinking in>... I wish my NC would also lead to an FWB...<sigh> Nways, I dunno why you would refuse a booty call like that but then strange things happen after a BU....Go on NC again...who knows...she may offer a threesome next time around:laugh: Haha it would literally destroy me being FWB, it hurts enough when i talk to her for a 10 minutes never mind everyday. The sex is a good part of it ofc i would never get over her if i was FWB well i dont think i would
AlexCross Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Matt, she sent that text to you to see if you would respond, it is a way for her to seek validation that you still care, that she could still have you wrapped around her pinky. That is why she brought up the FWB thing. She didnt text you weeks ago. Look outside the box!
Author Matt145 Posted August 13, 2012 Author Posted August 13, 2012 I guess but i dont care about the text now, because im pretty glad that i spoke to her apart from her asking me to be FWB . But ive got a bit of closure what i needed i broke NC a few other times just to get that closure and she never gave me it, i feel really really low right now but now i have closure it will help me long term.
flitzanu Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 so she wants to sleep with you until she finds a new guy to replace you. is that what you want? to get physically attached and for her to suddenly just drop you again? 2
Dblock10 Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 yeah unfortunately your not in the right place for fwb. so you did the right thing. would only hurt yourself in the long run. hats off to you for that strength that is a good quality you have there mate 1
melenkurion Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 You did the right thing, you should be proud of yourself. FWB would totally mess with your head. 2
barese1 Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 I pretty much turned down fwb too, I think you did the right thing. If you're emotionally attached it will just destroy you...well I keep telling myself that anyway
soccerrprp Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 Good to have said no. You don't have a time and date stamp with your texts?
Author Matt145 Posted August 14, 2012 Author Posted August 14, 2012 She called me off unknown this morning the bitch and i answered because i didnt know it was her because some of my friends call me off unknown. She asked me to go to her house for a catch up, which was sex obv course but she didnt want to just say it. I said no that wouldnt be a good idea. She said she cant help but contact me she misses me so much ect. Ughhhhh this girl really wont just let go of me.
flitzanu Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 She called me off unknown this morning the bitch and i answered because i didnt know it was her because some of my friends call me off unknown. She asked me to go to her house for a catch up, which was sex obv course but she didnt want to just say it. I said no that wouldnt be a good idea. She said she cant help but contact me she misses me so much ect. Ughhhhh this girl really wont just let go of me. no, she can and DID let go of you by breaking up with you. sex does not equal relationship. 1
Author Matt145 Posted August 14, 2012 Author Posted August 14, 2012 no, she can and DID let go of you by breaking up with you. sex does not equal relationship. Its not just sex what she wants, infact i dont think sex bothers her so much. She begged me to be normal friends and because i said no she started to try and lure me in to her with sex. She wants me to be there for her and all stuff like that aswell.
flitzanu Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 Its not just sex what she wants, infact i dont think sex bothers her so much. She begged me to be normal friends and because i said no she started to try and lure me in to her with sex. She wants me to be there for her and all stuff like that aswell. i'm only referring to your last line, "this girl just won't let go of me". if that were the case, she wouldn't have left. you're giving her the best of both worlds right now. she has you at her beck and call and likely to start sleeping with, and without the restrain of a relationship, which means she gets to bang other dudes with no restrictions.
Drseussgrrl Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 Wow what a great deal for you. She gets an emotional tampon in ADDITION to a FWB sitch until something else comes along that catches her attention. Any amount of catering to your ex's selfish whims just sends her the message that you will take her under any circumstances which means you don't respect yourself enough to tell her to jump in a lake. Seriously go tell her to jump in a lake. Block her from contacting you with these little BS texts and suggestions that indicate she only has herself in mind. Screw all that noise. You've got better sh*t to do.
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