twisted_luck102 Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 My bf and I were together for 5.5 years. (we're turning 25 so you can do the math.) We broke one once when we were a year into the relashionship so we can see other people. He thought at that time that we were going to be together forever and even though i loved him i, as any 19 year old would I got scared and unsure. I wanted to see other people to make sure he was "the one." He fought and fought and after 2 months and seeing maybe one or two people we got back together. We've been living together for the past 2-3 years. We've talked about marriage and kids. At this point in the relashionship I was completely 100% I wanted to be with him. The whole seeing other people thing didn't bother me. In December 2011 I went to Cancun with my cousin. Our waiter at one of the restaurants was really cute and talking to us. At the end of the night he left a note in my receipt saying your really pretty. This was the first night of our vacation. In a way I did like this guy. But i was always the type to think that you cant love someone and like someone at the same time. and the fact that it was kinda happening to me really scared me. The entire vacation I was kinda thinking about this guy in the back of my mind. On our last night we decided to go back to the same restaurant and he was there and remembered me. We talked even more and after he got out of work he asked us to hang out. It was him, me, my cousin and one of his friends. We went out to eat and then afterwards sat on the bench just talking. I wanted to tel him i had a bf but i didn't.After a few hours of talking, we kissed. it was a 5 second kiss that i stopped immediately. I couldn't believe what i had done! I thought of my bf the moment our lips touched. I didn't feel a thing for this guy. I cant lie to my bf and i feel honesty is the best policy. so i told him the entire story. he said it was going to take him a while to get over it. we went out on a date and even he said this made us stronger. a few weeks ago i went out to a club for a friends bday and i had only 2 drinks. apparently the drinks were very strong. i blacked out and ended up dancing with a random guy and from what my friends told me he was kissing my neck. again me being an honest person i told him. he didn't have any reaction he didnt tell me anything. two weeks later he tells me that he cant trust me anymore and that he was going to break up with me and move out. he also brought up the fact that he thinks i need to see other people. cancun happened 8 months ago... i thought that would be enough time to get over it. plus he never talked to me during these months that it was still bothering him. i think the part that hurts the most is that he didnt talk to me about it he didnt want to work it out. and as far as the whole trust thing, i get it. but it was only a kiss-not a make out session, didnt have sex with anyone. and the moral of the story was that i didnt feel anything for this guy when i did kiss him. as far as my friends party that was the alcohol that got me that bad. i learned my lesson from that right away. i vowed after that to never have hard liquor out anymore. so i wasnt going too and havent since. i plan on seeing other people and going on dates and stuff but i feel like im always going to think of him, think that this is the person that im supposed to spend my life with. it has been a week and i feel like its the longest week of my life! i miss him so much! im just hoping he eventually realizes that it wasn't a big a deal as he is making it out to be in his head. im hoping that once i see other people but at the end of the day choose him- that that would make him realize also. does anyone have a similar experience?
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