irc333 Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Friend of mine has to laugh at all his male friends that are "enablers" to his other female friends in his Social FB network. He was telling me how, when a woman puts a picture of herself up posing in a swimsuit at a beach or her "night out on the town' dressed to the nines, they're always complimenting on how great she looks or how attractive she is. He feels , if you want to achieve success with women, to not participate in this...and THAT woman will find THAT particular guy attractive. Now, I tend to give compliments to a woman's appearance , but ONLY if I've known her pretty well, or have some kind of rapport with her. But occasionally, a woman would put up a rather flattering photo of herself in a dress, and VOOM, she gets swarmed with "Pretty eyes" or "You're beautiful!" comments left and right. According to him, bad move, because the next time you see her in person at a party, she might be drawn to YOU because you played it cool and not like the drooling numnuts, because you did something different. Apparently, he learned this from one of the David De'Angelo lessons. True or false?
Emilia Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I think it works with attention whores and emotionally unhealthy women who seek constant approval. With good, steady, stable types it doesn't but then again those don't post photos of themselves wearing a bikini. 7
xxoo Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Stay away from the attention addicts on fb altogether. Aren't there any grown up women where you live? 1
stillafool Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Why are there so many attention seekers now a days? I agree with the other posters but remember if you don't ever comment on her appearance she may think you aren't attracted to her and move on.
Author irc333 Posted July 31, 2012 Author Posted July 31, 2012 Why are there so many attention seekers now a days? I agree with the other posters but remember if you don't ever comment on her appearance she may think you aren't attracted to her and move on. Or, she if you do comment, she might want to move on. LOL I'm even starting to see some women, who weren't much of attention seekers in the past, only to have FB enable it or them join up in the hype.
Taramere Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I don't like pics of myself, so I don't tend to put them up on Facebook. If I do put a pic up, I don't take offence about people not commenting, as I wouldn't expect the vast majority to comment. On the other hand, if a man wants some sort of interaction going with a woman, then commenting on her pic might be one way to start it. I can't see how not commenting would somehow get her attention. Even with the prettiest girls/women on my facebook list, I don't think they're bombarded with comments from men every time they put a new pic up. More usually it's women who comment on new pics. From what I've seen anyway. 2
GravityMan Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Why are there so many attention seekers now a days? I agree with the other posters but remember if you don't ever comment on her appearance she may think you aren't attracted to her and move on. Agreed. I say FALSE to the OP's question, because of the word "never". Most women want to feel desired. HOW you comment on her appearance is what matters. Some guys overdo it big-time, and other guys do it in a manner that women may consider distasteful. Most women have more qualities than just their looks and they want to be appreciated for those, too. I'm particularly referring to those who aren't attention seekers. I mean, if I've driven to a woman's house to pick her up for a date, and she's dressed to impress...then of course I'm going to give her a nice compliment. It seems weird not to. 2
jobaba Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 For what it is worth... I have NEVER given a physical compliment to a woman I have hooked up with or dated ... before we hooked up. I have never told them they were beautiful, pretty, or cute before the fact. I have however been rejected by a number of women that I have called beautiful, pretty, and cute and truly believed it. I'd also add the women I've hooked up with and the women who have rejected me have been on par with the women who've rejected me the most part ... average.
todreaminblue Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Friend of mine has to laugh at all his male friends that are "enablers" to his other female friends in his Social FB network. He was telling me how, when a woman puts a picture of herself up posing in a swimsuit at a beach or her "night out on the town' dressed to the nines, they're always complimenting on how great she looks or how attractive she is. He feels , if you want to achieve success with women, to not participate in this...and THAT woman will find THAT particular guy attractive. Now, I tend to give compliments to a woman's appearance , but ONLY if I've known her pretty well, or have some kind of rapport with her. But occasionally, a woman would put up a rather flattering photo of herself in a dress, and VOOM, she gets swarmed with "Pretty eyes" or "You're beautiful!" comments left and right. According to him, bad move, because the next time you see her in person at a party, she might be drawn to YOU because you played it cool and not like the drooling numnuts, because you did something different. Apparently, he learned this from one of the David De'Angelo lessons. True or false? TRUE I think it is hard to build a conversation on you have pretty eyes or i like your hair its a one word answer.....or two....why thankyou ....and thennnnnnnnnnnnnnnn guy smiles looks uncomfortable stares and thennnnnnnnnnnnnnnn guy walks away girl looks confused 1
Star Gazer Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I think it works with attention whores and emotionally unhealthy women who seek constant approval. With good, steady, stable types it doesn't but then again those don't post photos of themselves wearing a bikini. This. It goes both ways too, as emotionally unhealthy men who need approval are also guilty of posting attention seeking shirtless pics.
fortyninethousand322 Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Just ask her if she's a model and if she says yes, ask her if she models Halloween masks. 1
snug.bunny Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 FALSE. Why not just be yourself instead of following some set of lame-o "PUA rules". And by-the-by, attention seeking behavior is not solely limited via pictures.
Revolver Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Women like compliments on the appearance... But Only By the guys they want. 2
Mme. Chaucer Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Stay away from the attention addicts on fb altogether. Aren't there any grown up women where you live? No kidding. OP - you really should not be playing in the kiddie pool at your stage of life. Grown ups can be cool!
USMCHokie Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 In regard to your specific FB example, I doubt something like this is even on her radar...and I seriously doubt she spends each night going through her friend list and finding who didn't comment on her pictures... 1
EasyHeart Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I can't comment on the social media aspects, but way back in college I learned this important fact about women: "Tell the smart ones that they're pretty and tell the pretty ones that they're smart." It works. 1
Eternal Sunshine Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 None of this BS matters. She will either find you attractive or not.
aj22one Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I compliment people on my appearance all the time. Works like a charm. haha 2
John Stiles Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I think you can only say "never" to a very few things. Compliments are fine, it doesn't ruin anything, but you shouldn't overdo it. When I give a compliment I either understate it ("you look alright" / "hmmm...not bad"), or I give an unusual compliment ("I love your elbows"). And from time to time I'll give a full compliment. The trick is to make compliments a treat.
Mme. Chaucer Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I think you can only say "never" to a very few things. Compliments are fine, it doesn't ruin anything, but you shouldn't overdo it. When I give a compliment I either understate it ("you look alright" / "hmmm...not bad"), or I give an unusual compliment ("I love your elbows"). And from time to time I'll give a full compliment. The trick is to make compliments a treat. How has your carefully calibrated approach paid off in your dating / relationship life?
John Stiles Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 How has your carefully calibrated approach paid off in your dating / relationship life? Oh look, it's my groupie again. Yes Madame, its works beautifully.
grkBoy Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I compliment women all the time. I could care less if she will be flattered or think I'm some sappy nice guy kissing her feet. Confidence is when you can walk away from her when you see she's a stuck-up princess. It's not about trying to knock her off her pedestal in the hopes low self-esteem will score you a date with her.
Negative Nancy Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 True or false? What's true is that your little mini-rant proves once again that your gender is shallow and only cares about looks. 1
SJC2008 Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I think it works with attention whores and emotionally unhealthy women who seek constant approval. With good, steady, stable types it doesn't but then again those don't post photos of themselves wearing a bikini. I think it works the other way around. I've been on two dates who have made derogatory coments about the way they look and I didn't take the bait and kiss their asses and dindn't get second dates from them.
Cracker Jack Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 There's nothing wrong with complimenting a woman. More times than not, I've made a woman's day just by telling them they were beautiful or telling them how nicely their outfit looked on them. I just think, as mentioned, some guys are over the top with it, whether that's complimenting her a bit too much, or being too silly(you're hotter than the sun, girlie, etc) with them. I remember when I would overdo the complimenting, which eventually bored the woman I was into back then. No reason to avoid complimenting a woman--especially if you think it puts you in a good position. 2
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