irc333 Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 I hear a lot of people that say not to approach a woman at work because you'll be interfering with her work. I have to honestly say, it depends on the job. I've literally seen front desk welcome desk clerks in government establishments or ANY place really,...twiddling her thumbs...doing nothing, browsing the web, or texting. So, don't approach with caution, approach as much as possible. Mall store clerks is another, most days at malls are slow, and I used to approach jewelry store clerks quite a few times, I'd see them sitting there , leaning on the glass show case, staring off into la-la land, and that's when you can approach! So that being said, you can't really interfere with their work, because they're not really working.
CarrieT Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 I used to approach jewelry store clerks quite a few times, I'd see them sitting there , leaning on the glass show case, staring off into la-la land, and that's when you can approach! So that being said, you can't really interfere with their work, because they're not really working. Wrong, wrong, wrong... You don't have a clue what is going on their mind or what their work entails. Just because someone is not physically doing something does not mean they are not working - especially if it is retail (i.e., "leaning on the glass showcase, staring off into la-la-land.") You are a Class-A jerk if you believe that and still hit on a girl while she is working. I've owned and managed retail stores and part of the sales technique is to teach the sellers the art of non-chalance. They may not be sitting there polishing jewelry or setting up displays, but giving the appearance of being approachable is part of the psychology of sales. If you hang with a girl to chat her up and ask her out, you ARE interfering with her ability to work and talk to other potential customers because you are causing interference. Lay off, dude. Leave the poor working girls alone.
Author irc333 Posted July 30, 2012 Author Posted July 30, 2012 To be honest, you're part of the problem. The ability to keep men from asking women out. To judge someone as a "Class A Jerk" as you call it for approaching say a jewelry store clerk, means you probably have a serious problem with men or a man-hater, yes? But hey, we can both play the "psychology of flirting with jewelry store girls" right? Both can play that game. LOL Sorry, but men have asked women out at their place of work for 100's of years, and there's nothing "Class A Jerk" about it. When I was in my college days, me and my friends used to flirt with women at the mall all the time, get their #'s and get dates. One time, I recall when I was purchasing something, she asked for my phone #, and I said, "Really? But we just met! Can I ask you to dinner?" And she laughed and said, "No, I need it to put it on our system, sorry...I have a boyfriend." The good ol days/good times. Wrong, wrong, wrong... You don't have a clue what is going on their mind or what their work entails. Just because someone is not physically doing something does not mean they are not working - especially if it is retail (i.e., "leaning on the glass showcase, staring off into la-la-land.") You are a Class-A jerk if you believe that and still hit on a girl while she is working. I've owned and managed retail stores and part of the sales technique is to teach the sellers the art of non-chalance. They may not be sitting there polishing jewelry or setting up displays, but giving the appearance of being approachable is part of the psychology of sales. If you hang with a girl to chat her up and ask her out, you ARE interfering with her ability to work and talk to other potential customers because you are causing interference. Lay off, dude. Leave the poor working girls alone.
fortyninethousand322 Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 I say don't worry about "the poor working girls". They're adults, they can handle being approached. I've been a sales associate before, and while I'm a guy, I can assure you that being a sales associate is about as taxing as sitting on a lounge chair. I always enjoyed people coming in and chatting (in my store usually it was old people) and I would have loved it if some girl came in and chatted me up then asked me out. So, don't even worry about what people think. The people who tell you not to try it are the people whose advice is not worth listening to.
serial muse Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 One time, I recall when I was purchasing something, she asked for my phone #, and I said, "Really? But we just met! Can I ask you to dinner?" And she laughed and said, "No, I need it to put it on our system, sorry...I have a boyfriend." This story doesn't really support the idea that it's worthwhile to approach these people, though. People in those service positions are trained to be nice - in fact, it's their job. If they are doing it well (and you're the sort of person who isn't clued into this), you might think that they're flirting with you, when in fact they're just being pleasant. So maybe it really isn't the best plan, is all I'm saying. (And it's sort of what you said too - perhaps without realizing it.)
LittlePrince Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 I can assure you that being a sales associate is about as taxing as sitting on a lounge chair. Pretty much. It steamed my beans they would get paid more than me while as a merchandiser, i.e. glorified stocker, I did actual work and then be expected to do their job too without commission.
LittlePrince Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 This story doesn't really support the idea that it's worthwhile to approach these people, though. People in those service positions are trained to be nice - in fact, it's their job. If they are doing it well (and you're the sort of person who isn't clued into this), you might think that they're flirting with you, when in fact they're just being pleasant. So maybe it really isn't the best plan, is all I'm saying. (And it's sort of what you said too - perhaps without realizing it.) Women in general will act nice because they are trained to be. I guess don't ask out any women at all.
fortyninethousand322 Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 Women in general will act nice because they are trained to be. I guess don't ask out any women at all. As far as I can tell that's pretty much the goal. I mean there's all these rules. Don't ask a girl out at the gym, don't date people from your classes at school, don't date your boss, don't date your subordinate, don't date your siblings friends, don't ask out women working at the store. Only a sucker is going to follow these rules.
Author irc333 Posted July 30, 2012 Author Posted July 30, 2012 As far as I can tell that's pretty much the goal. I mean there's all these rules. Don't ask a girl out at the gym, don't date people from your classes at school, don't date your boss, don't date your subordinate, don't date your siblings friends, don't ask out women working at the store. Only a sucker is going to follow these rules. Yeah, believe it or not, there are some people that...that the more the person the stranger is to them, the better. Because people tend to date with failure in mind. Meaning that JUST in case things don't work out.....they won't see them in their same social circle, apartment complex, or gym again.
grkBoy Posted July 30, 2012 Posted July 30, 2012 I treat this like any instance...IS SHE SHOWING REAL INTEREST? So I am in an office talking to a receptionist for some reason, maybe her boss is keeping me waiting, and we click, chat, and she even gives out subtle hints she would know me outside of work. Maybe some common interest and now we talk about meeting up. THEN...you try. Most other times she's being friendly, but guys mistake it for interest. Waitresses and bartenders go through this a lot.
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