justwhoiam Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 Hey, Well, I haven't been totally honest with you. I use this website to track if my email has been opened. I generally use it to check if important mails have been read by clients. I used the same website to check if she read my email. I'm sorry, didn't want to come off looking like a creepy guy. So yeah, I received an email on Sunday afternoon saying that my email has been opened. Now, i don't know if she read it. Why do you say it's important? Sorry again. Nickk Ah, that's nice... what website? So well, she read it, but she doesn't know you know. Or does she know you use that website? I would say a week is what she might wait. But let's see what happens.
Author nickk Posted August 14, 2012 Author Posted August 14, 2012 Ah, that's nice... what website? So well, she read it, but she doesn't know you know. Or does she know you use that website? I would say a week is what she might wait. But let's see what happens. Hi, No she doesn't know that I use the website. I use this website called 'didtheyreadit'. Hope she replies soon Nickk
Author nickk Posted August 19, 2012 Author Posted August 19, 2012 She will. The problem is: when. Hey JustWhoIAm, Hope you well. It's been a week and she hasn't responded to the email yet! She did update her status on fb about how excited she is about moving back home and starting university. What do you think I should do? Looking forward to your reply. Nickk
justwhoiam Posted August 19, 2012 Posted August 19, 2012 Hey JustWhoIAm, Hope you well. It's been a week and she hasn't responded to the email yet! She did update her status on fb about how excited she is about moving back home and starting university. What do you think I should do? Looking forward to your reply. Nickk Well, you waited quite some time before writing to her Just wait and see... hoping she won't forget to answer. Be patient... Do you have your own FB page? You could stop writing/updating and see what happens. That way, she wouldn't have any more news about you.
Author nickk Posted August 19, 2012 Author Posted August 19, 2012 Well, you waited quite some time before writing to her Just wait and see... hoping she won't forget to answer. Be patient... Do you have your own FB page? You could stop writing/updating and see what happens. That way, she wouldn't have any more news about you. I do have a facebook page but I'm not the kind who updates his status everyday. There is a quality about this girl that I would like you to know. She gets very excited about things happening at the present. At this moment, she has a lot of things to be excited about, like quitting the job she hates, moving back home, starting university, her best friend's wedding... Do you think the reason for her not to respond to my email, is because she has too many things to be happy about at the moment? I believe that when two people break up from a bad relationship, though they are happy initially they do miss the each other sometimes. (they could miss the good time they shared, or miss each other's company) But in our case, it was an excellent relationship. Do you think there are times when she misses me the way I miss her. I love her so very much. Thanks again for responding, you have been great. Nickk
justwhoiam Posted August 19, 2012 Posted August 19, 2012 I do have a facebook page but I'm not the kind who updates his status everyday. Don't enter it for a couple of weeks then. Do you think the reason for her not to respond to my email, is because she has too many things to be happy about at the moment? That might get in the way somehow... but if she has not stopped being in love with you, you surely are on her mind quite often during the day and before falling asleep. You can force yourself to stop thinking, but it usually doesn't work Do you think there are times when she misses me the way I miss her. That might be. Have you ever heard her remembering things of her past fondly? That might be a trait of her personality too. There are people who forget easily. I forget trivia easily and remember others that were important to me. Remember: she wanted distance and you offered her that. Now you're doing your best. So try not to be sad. You never know what's going to happen next! 1
Author nickk Posted August 20, 2012 Author Posted August 20, 2012 but if she has not stopped being in love with you I so hope she hasn't stopped being in love with me!! That might be. Have you ever heard her remembering things of her past fondly? That might be a trait of her personality too. Well, yes. She did remember certain things fondly. Mostly things that happened when she was young. Remember: she wanted distance and you offered her that. Now you're doing your best. So try not to be sad. You never know what's going to happen next! Trust me, I am trying very hard not to be sad. I was just thinking to myself that I have nothing to worry about at the moment other than my personal life. I like what I do at my job though it isn't paying me a great deal, I know that it will help me move back to the UK and achieve what I had planned when I was with her. There are times when I wake up at 2 in the night, missing her like crazy And I feel so helpless (which btw is the worst feeling). Believe me, if I could I would take the next flight back to London. I miss everything about her. I understand I'll have to be patient, but it's real hard. I hope and pray that we end up with each other eventually.
justwhoiam Posted August 20, 2012 Posted August 20, 2012 I hope and pray that we end up with each other eventually. I joined you on that.
Author nickk Posted August 23, 2012 Author Posted August 23, 2012 I joined you on that. Hey JustWhoIAm, Hope you had a good week. Just a little update. I had given her as a 'personal referee' at my new job. Though the probation at this place is for 3 months, they like my work and have decided to offer me a permanent role and I'm just over a month old here. But before they can do it, they require 2 references, one personal and one professional. So the HR manager has sent her an email requesting a reference mail. She hasn't replied though. I called my old work place in UK this evening to speak to the manager because I had given him as my professional referee. And she answered the phone, I was very happy to listen to her voice, but I didn't say much. I asked her if the manager was in and if I could speak to him. She sounded very surprised when she heard my voice. I really hope she thinks about me when she gets back home from work. And yeah, she still hasn't replied to my email, and it's almost 2 weeks Nickk (p.s. sorry if you find this confusing. We used to work together in UK and that's how I got to know her)
justwhoiam Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 Wow... didn't you ask her if she received your email? I know you know she did, but she doesn't know you used that software, so it was perfectly normal that you could ask her about it...
Author nickk Posted August 23, 2012 Author Posted August 23, 2012 Wow... didn't you ask her if she received your email? I know you know she did, but she doesn't know you used that software, so it was perfectly normal that you could ask her about it... Well, I didn't. I wasn't expecting her to answer the phone. In fact I didn't know she was in today. I wanted to speak to her for long, but because it was sort of an official call I couldn't. Nickk
Author nickk Posted August 24, 2012 Author Posted August 24, 2012 Bad. And formal. Hey, Hope that hasn't affected my chances. Like I mentioned, I really wanted to speak to her. But I had called the work phone and I thought it would be inappropriate if I asked her if she received my email. A little update. I received an email from that website I use to track my emails saying that she has read my email again this morning. Do you think that's a good sign? Nickk
justwhoiam Posted August 25, 2012 Posted August 25, 2012 Hey, Do you think that's a good sign? Yes. But you not mentioning about your email was not good. Something like: "Oh, Hi! I sent you an email days ago, I hope you received it!" & then going on with the work stuff would have been fine.
Author nickk Posted August 25, 2012 Author Posted August 25, 2012 Yes. But you not mentioning about your email was not good. Something like: "Oh, Hi! I sent you an email days ago, I hope you received it!" & then going on with the work stuff would have been fine. I should have But I tried to make up for it by ringing her yesterday, she didn't answer. I hope she replies to my email soon. Do you think it would be a good idea if I sent her a card wishing her good luck for her masters?? Will it be too much, and look too desperate?? Nickk
justwhoiam Posted August 25, 2012 Posted August 25, 2012 Do you think it would be a good idea if I sent her a card wishing her good luck for her masters?? What about a quick note telling her just what you explained here? "Hi, the other day I was happy you answered the phone, it was sort of unexpected and I didn't want to talk about personal stuff while you were at work or cause you any kind of discomfort... I was almost about to ask you if you ever received my email. I sent you an email a few weeks ago. I just hope it didn't get lost somewhere in the virtual space." Something along those lines. Will it be too much, and look too desperate?? If you said a good luck card for her master's? Yes...
Author nickk Posted August 26, 2012 Author Posted August 26, 2012 If you said a good luck card for her master's? Yes... Hi, Are you telling me that It's a bad idea to send her a card wishing her good luck for her university?? I'm sorry, I'm a little confused. Nickk
justwhoiam Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Sorry, that was a typo. If you send her (not if you said).
Author nickk Posted August 26, 2012 Author Posted August 26, 2012 Sorry, that was a typo. If you send her (not if you said). Hey JustWhoIAm, I'm so sorry, I'm still confused. Should I or shouldn't I not send her a good luck card?? Sorry again. Nickk
justwhoiam Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Will it be too much, and look too desperate?? Yes. That's just my opinion, of course. And get yourself together, because what you're doing doesn't make sense. It wouldn't make sense to me. I sum it up for you: 1. you distance yourself from her, thinking that's what she wants 2. you still love her and want her bad, but secretly 3. after a long while, you send her a long letter (not sure about the whole content) 4. you happen to talk to her on the phone by chance, and act as complete stranger 5. now you want to send her a good luck card for her studies If you're over her, a good luck card is not a big deal. Did she express she wants to be friends with you? But if you still want something else for the two of you, I don't think your current attitude will bring results.
Author nickk Posted August 26, 2012 Author Posted August 26, 2012 Yes. That's just my opinion, of course. And get yourself together, because what you're doing doesn't make sense. It wouldn't make sense to me. I sum it up for you: 1. you distance yourself from her, thinking that's what she wants 2. you still love her and want her bad, but secretly 3. after a long while, you send her a long letter (not sure about the whole content) 4. you happen to talk to her on the phone by chance, and act as complete stranger 5. now you want to send her a good luck card for her studies If you're over her, a good luck card is not a big deal. Did she express she wants to be friends with you? But if you still want something else for the two of you, I don't think your current attitude will bring results. Hey JustWhoIAm, Thank you, I really get what you're saying. I really regret for being very formal with her over the phone, I thought it would be inappropriate to ask her about the email over the work phone and again I wasn't expecting her to answer the phone. Totally my mistake. Like I mentioned earlier I did call her and she didn't answer. Please don't think I'm blaming her. After the breakup I waited 2 and a half weeks to send her an email only because I know she was hurt as well and I didn't think it would be a good idea to email her immediately. (I don't really know if I did the right think by waiting that long) Yeah, I love her to bits and there is nothing more I want than to get back with her. And the reason I wanted to send her a card is because I want her to know that I still think about her and haven't given up & moved on. See, the problem is I don't really know how to express my feeling towards her. I of course want her as more than a friend, I still think my life and hers would be better if we spent it with each other. I don't want to loose her by acting too desperate and by indirectly forcing her to think about me. I have valued your comments right from your first reply and will continue to do so. I don't have words to express how much I miss her, every little thing reminds me of her! I understand she reading my email again is a good sign, but why isn't she replying? It would be great if you could tell me what I need to do next. I know I might have come off looking like a guy who is trying to detach himself from her, but that's not true. There is not a single day where I don't pray for things to get back to the way they were before. I love her and will continue to do so. Please try and help me. Nickk
Author nickk Posted August 27, 2012 Author Posted August 27, 2012 I don't think your current attitude will bring results. Hey JustWhoIAm, I really need your opinion on what to do next, please!! Thanks Nickk
justwhoiam Posted August 27, 2012 Posted August 27, 2012 Ok. If I were you I would write a quick note to her asking when it would be a good moment to call her, without mentioning the old email. You say you are sorry you felt unprepared when she answered the phone at work, that you would have liked to ask her how she was, and you were happy to hear from her. But you didn't want to make her uncomfortable with that. End the letter with somethng nice, but not too forward. And as a closing: Best, Nick (I know it's not proper English, but quite vague). How did you close your other emails? That's an important part (closing & opening).
Author nickk Posted August 28, 2012 Author Posted August 28, 2012 Hey, I too had thought of sending her another email but wasn't really sure what to say. End the letter with somethng nice, but not too forward. Sorry, like what? (I'm sorry, please don't think I'm making you do all the work for me) How did you close your other emails? That's an important part (closing & opening). I opened saying "Hey Jen" and the first sentence of the mail was "How you been?" and ended the mail telling her that i will be looking forward to her reply and Signed off saying "Miss You, Nick"- I hope that didn't freak her. She moved back home on Sunday, she has posted a picture of her home on FB, and captioned it "Home for good :)" I know she is very happy having moved back and will be looking forward to start university. The only thing bothering me is what if she doesn't respond to the email this time too?? I'm trying not to upset myself too much by thinking that she was probably busy and couldn't find time to reply. Thank You. Nickk
justwhoiam Posted August 28, 2012 Posted August 28, 2012 Sorry, like what? (I'm sorry, please don't think I'm making you do all the work for me) Some positive thought about her brand new start, for example. I opened saying "Hey Jen" and the first sentence of the mail was "How you been?" and ended the mail telling her that i will be looking forward to her reply and Signed off saying "Miss You, Nick"- I hope that didn't freak her. Hmmm. "Hey" is something I would expect from my brother... while "miss you" cries for help. I don't know. But I guess now it doesn't matter much anymore, what's done's done. what if she doesn't respond to the email this time too?? She might wonder what's the phone call about. She might assume what it is about and not wanting contact with you. I don't think waiting forever is doing you any good. If she doesn't love you, nothing will make her love you. If she cares anything about you, she shouldn't let 2 emails go unanswered. The quick note asking when you can call is to get a moment with her when she can be well-disposed to talking to you, or anyway to avoid talking about personal matters in just written messages. There's no real-time interaction and lots of room for misunderstanding. With a call, you can also get a better vibe about how she feels about you right now. she was probably busy and couldn't find time to reply. We're not here to fool ourselves, right? No girl is ever SO busy that she can't say "hi" or "thank you, i'll get back to you asap". Maybe she didn't know what to answer, or she's having mixed feelings about whether she should answer at all.
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