MarMarMar Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 So I don't think anyone will remember me or my story since this was a while ago but here it goes: So my ex broke up with me in October of last year over a text message, blah blah I emo-ed out for a while, wanted him back but went no contact because I knew he was no good for me. Time passes slowly and I find myself feeling better( special thanks to this site ) though he never stops coming by my work despite my wishes otherwise; but all was well regardless. I get over it and just to reiterate what everyone on this site says NC was a huge help. Update about me: I end up getting together with a friend I've known for some time and we're very happy(woot!). I'm having a great time with my new bf; we've got a ton in common(healthy and active, love videogames, awesome sense of humor, etc.) extra plus is that he's older than me (Passed his GIGS/immature stage) and he has a history of long committed relationships. Totally love my cheeseball man haha. On to the update about the ex: Eventually I start hearing from coworkers my ex insists on talking to about our past relationship and that he misses me and all the hopeless wah wah. For the record to those of you in similar situations it was the type of wah wah that has no backing guys that maturity usually have don't waste your time waiting on someone. Anyways I pay it no mind because I'm not interested anymore and we even sort of talk sometimes since he's always at my work. He seems to be hurt that I moved on but it's not my problem anymore and I can't do anything to help his feelings either way. So hopefully it'll be a lesson learned on how to treat partners for him one day. On to the ewwww: It seems my ex is dating a 15 year old(keep in mind he turns 22 in like a week) girl who looks like he's twelve. I only know because my coworkers were all grossed out by it and kept telling me for some reason and I saw them holding hands the other day so ewwwwwww. So there it is! Part Recovery story, part cautionary tale, part ewww! Hope you guys take something useful out of this read since I appreciated this site's help and this is my attempt to return the favor!
Miss.Misunderstood Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 You said your man is older? Is who are you to judge? Think before you speak. Just because shes 15 you think its gross. (Maybe your new man can rub some of that mature, you love so much, off on you.) If she was 22 and he was 29, chances are you wouldnt have a problem with it.
PropertyChaser Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 Yeah I was going to say, that's awfully ironic of you to be bragging about dating an older guy.. he's just doing the same kinda thing. Stop being so morally superior.
Author MarMarMar Posted July 21, 2012 Author Posted July 21, 2012 (edited) Before you become self righteous with me, I'm not being morally superior when I say she looks like she's twelve she hasn't actually hit puberty yet. I have a sister a year younger than her who is more physically mature which is part of the reason I find it gross. Also since he is about to turn 22 it does in fact make it illegal where I live so another part of the gross is that more than likely he will end up a registered sex offender after this is over. I do happen to know the girl in question and it's a definite possibility since her mom likes to exploit people. My coworkers are complaining about it because they know this as well. As for my post I wasn't intending to be righteous myself when I posted I just figured a lot of the posters might need either a laugh or a deterrent from contacting their exes. And I'm an adult female(21) dating a adult male(27) so maybe you should think before you speak and stop taking offense to something you are more than likely projecting on. Edited July 21, 2012 by MarMarMar 2
dinosaur Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 Agreed, he's taking advantage of a 15-year-old and that is gross. But, he too is immature so maybe this is a good match for him? Anyways, you've found someone much better (woohoo!) and he doesn't matter any more. Maybe he's trying to make you jealous? You have better things to do than worry about him - he's obviously desperate.
Author MarMarMar Posted July 21, 2012 Author Posted July 21, 2012 Agreed, he's taking advantage of a 15-year-old and that is gross. But, he too is immature so maybe this is a good match for him? Anyways, you've found someone much better (woohoo!) and he doesn't matter any more. Maybe he's trying to make you jealous? You have better things to do than worry about him - he's obviously desperate. Honestly I'm worried about him. All my coworkers and I know the mom and daughter are manipulators because they actually took advantage of one of my coworkers when she was planning on moving and looking for roommates. But it's so refreshing to be in an open honest relationship where I'm not borderline abused and lied to all the time so yeah totally diggin it!
dinosaur Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 You may be worried, but he's not a part of your life any more and you have to remember that. If you try to help him or say this girl is bad he may take this as a sign of you crawling back to him in jealousy over this girl. Just let him make his own mistakes. Perhaps someone else can help him?
CopingGal Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 MarMar, You have every right to gloat. He is dating a child. Does the mother know he is dating a child? Should this guy be reported to the police? What is going on here?
Author MarMarMar Posted July 21, 2012 Author Posted July 21, 2012 You may be worried, but he's not a part of your life any more and you have to remember that. If you try to help him or say this girl is bad he may take this as a sign of you crawling back to him in jealousy over this girl. Just let him make his own mistakes. Perhaps someone else can help him? Yeah I know that and that would definitely be his reaction which is why I'm keeping my mouth shut and my coworkers don't even know how to approach the situation, but they've been trying to drop hints I guess.
Author MarMarMar Posted July 21, 2012 Author Posted July 21, 2012 MarMar, You have every right to gloat. He is dating a child. Does the mother know he is dating a child? Should this guy be reported to the police? What is going on here? That's the worst part honestly the mom's all for it. The mom is also constantly trying to get in the pants of my ex's dad(he's married btw) it's totally creepy.
dinosaur Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 Yeah =/ I can see that's a pretty f'd up situation, but it's definitely not your responsibility so don't feel guilty about it. If you can help indirectly I guess you can try that but don't talk to him, etc because he's just using this girl as bait to catch your attention. Whether it's because he's dating a new girl or because she's 15 and it seems inappropriate to everyone, he's obviously trying to get attention and giving it to him would be the worst thing.
Author MarMarMar Posted July 21, 2012 Author Posted July 21, 2012 Yeah =/ I can see that's a pretty f'd up situation, but it's definitely not your responsibility so don't feel guilty about it. If you can help indirectly I guess you can try that but don't talk to him, etc because he's just using this girl as bait to catch your attention. Whether it's because he's dating a new girl or because she's 15 and it seems inappropriate to everyone, he's obviously trying to get attention and giving it to him would be the worst thing. Nah, and this is for the first two angry posters: he's actually showed up with at least two other short term girlfriends and I wasn't bothered by it at all. It actually made him agitated that he got no reaction out of me. And he's still not getting my attention in that way so no biggie. Not that I necessarily think it's to get my attention; it's just sort of disturbing. Besides he hasn't been able to get my attention in any of the other ways he tried so I would think he's realized he isn't getting me back.
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