avi_28 Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 For those that haven't read my first thread, http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/marriage-life-partnerships/infidelity/336684-feel-like-crawling-into-hole Anyone ever been in a situation like mines where your relationship is at it's worst and you can't leave bc of work or where you live? My situation is where I live I need to wait till the lease is up so I can get my deposit back so I can move from here... That being said...any good advice as to how I can slowly or just all together STOP being paranoid with his past cheating and whether he is doing it or not NOW? I just remembered late last night he is going to Georgia to go see his friend before he deploys and I understand him wanting to go see his friend, that's fine but whats freaking me out IS... We met when he was stationed in Georgia and THAT'S where most of his cheating occured when he was with his ex for 2 years while she lived in California...which means I am pretty sure he WILL go either 1. Visit some of the girls/Contacts them or 2. The friend he is going to visit may or may not know some of the girls etc.. I don't talk to this friend or his wife bc I can only imagine everything he has told them about me (they deleted me off facebook one night when he and I got into an argument bc I told him that I didn't want to hear stories about any of his exes and he flipped out started drinking and telling them I bother him and he couldn't erase the women he had been with) it's like they took offense to that and when they pretty much told him to break up with me he didn't he begged me to stay and although he did ask me to go to Georgia with him I can't bc of work which sucks bc I would go in a second! Maybe some how this will be a test to see if he messes up OR maybe it's just all in my head and I know that something may or may not happen... He knows I am nervous about this trip for him although I haven't said much... I also know that he is very aware that if I leave before the lease is up he isn't able to pay me back $$$ I paid for the security and deposit (his sister who owns the house decided to charge us double) #FML I am an emotional person, I tend to cry a lot and I have been crying like mad crazy last 4 days and he's seen me but bc he doesn't care he doesn't ask. I realized so much about him last night as I watched him play his games... His smile...it's forced... He'll ask me to cuddle with him and you can tell it's uncomfortable for him He's been kissing me a lot the past week which is RARE and I mean RARE Seems to be in a happy mood but it's so new to me that it feels awkward So much more... I need to figure something out to save my sanity so that I don't go crazy and make my self beyond sick and worried since August is almost here... Any advice...please?
penguin23 Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 I think you should focus on yourself. You don't seem happy in your relationship yet you want to hold onto it as much as possible. I understand that actually breaking up with him is really difficult but you don't seem happy at all in the relationship. At least with a break up you can start healing. Not sure about the living situation. It's really strange that his sister charged you double for the security. Maybe you could move in with a friend for a little while?
WhatYouWantToHear Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 I've met like 50 people in my life who have been cured of cancer, went to school with a guy who survived a shotgun to the head, Magic Johnson still hasn't died from AIDS, but not once have I ever seen anyone beat jealousy. You don't need advice, you need discipline and self-esteem. We can't help you there. 2
Author avi_28 Posted July 20, 2012 Author Posted July 20, 2012 I think you should focus on yourself. You don't seem happy in your relationship yet you want to hold onto it as much as possible. I understand that actually breaking up with him is really difficult but you don't seem happy at all in the relationship. At least with a break up you can start healing. Not sure about the living situation. It's really strange that his sister charged you double for the security. Maybe you could move in with a friend for a little while? I was charged double bc of his ex wife...he married an iraqi interpreter and brought her to the states..soon after she was in the house I live in now she began doing a lot of "re arranging" (holes in wall and destroying it etc.. After she did that she stole money amd certain things from the house and sent them back to Iraq then she returned herself... So bc I didn't knw his sister well enough her and her husband charged me double just in case I did the same thing... I have never felt so offended ever! But we needed a place... I am not from this area and the only friends I hv are co - wrkers that are all in their early 20's living at hm still .... I'm hoping time flys
Author avi_28 Posted July 20, 2012 Author Posted July 20, 2012 I've met like 50 people in my life who have been cured of cancer, went to school with a guy who survived a shotgun to the head, Magic Johnson still hasn't died from AIDS, but not once have I ever seen anyone beat jealousy. You don't need advice, you need discipline and self-esteem. We can't help you there. That I do need... Thank you!!
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