VV27 Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 First I'd like to start out by saying hello! My name is Vincent, I'm new here, and I'm looking for your advice and analysis as to a situation that I'm fairly clear on, but am looking to get a better, more objective read. Some background: There is a woman that I've been attracted to at the workplace for quite some time. She works there full time, I work there two days a week (we're about the same age; I'm in college, she is not). In short, I'm fairly sure she is attracted to me as well. Whenever we talk we make excellent eye contact, and we're all smiles. She laughs at almost everything I say, even when I'm not trying to be humorous. Sometimes, although, she seems a bit diffident around me (I believe because she is just naturally shy), and I always do my best to be kind to her and put her at ease. Anyway, I'm planning on asking her out, but before I make the jump to do so, I just want to better understand her body language from earlier today. This is how it went: I got lunch and took break in the employee rec room to watch some TV. I took the seat closest available, which happened to be behind and to the left of her. After a couple of minutes, her posture changed abruptly and she leaned way back into her seat and starting playing with the left portion of her hair (which was distracting, but pleasantly so), her right leg was crossed over her left, and she was leaning towards the left. The thing was, the whole time I was there, she never removed her hand from her hair, and she was constantly running her left hand through it, and scratching the back of her neck. At one point, she looked to the left (I think because I was out of her periphery) like she was trying to get a read on what I was watching (or perhaps I'm completely off base here). Anyway, there was no one else to the left of me. The thing was, I didn't know for sure if I was making her uncomfortable; I know on some level I was, but hopefully not in a bad way? What's your take on the situation? I am reading too much into this?
norajane Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 Just ask her out already. The eye contact, smiles and laughing at your jokes should be enough for you to ask her out.
Author VV27 Posted July 20, 2012 Author Posted July 20, 2012 Very well. Thanks for the affirmation. Perhaps I over-analyzed the situation a bit too much.
ThingsAreComplicated Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 I am reading too much into this? yes. The way you describe this I wonder how many times you have done this before Ask her out and you'll know more.
todreaminblue Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 First I'd like to start out by saying hello! My name is Vincent, I'm new here, and I'm looking for your advice and analysis as to a situation that I'm fairly clear on, but am looking to get a better, more objective read. Some background: There is a woman that I've been attracted to at the workplace for quite some time. She works there full time, I work there two days a week (we're about the same age; I'm in college, she is not). In short, I'm fairly sure she is attracted to me as well. Whenever we talk we make excellent eye contact, and we're all smiles. She laughs at almost everything I say, even when I'm not trying to be humorous. Sometimes, although, she seems a bit diffident around me (I believe because she is just naturally shy), and I always do my best to be kind to her and put her at ease. Anyway, I'm planning on asking her out, but before I make the jump to do so, I just want to better understand her body language from earlier today. This is how it went: I got lunch and took break in the employee rec room to watch some TV. I took the seat closest available, which happened to be behind and to the left of her. After a couple of minutes, her posture changed abruptly and she leaned way back into her seat and starting playing with the left portion of her hair (which was distracting, but pleasantly so), her right leg was crossed over her left, and she was leaning towards the left. The thing was, the whole time I was there, she never removed her hand from her hair, and she was constantly running her left hand through it, and scratching the back of her neck. At one point, she looked to the left (I think because I was out of her periphery) like she was trying to get a read on what I was watching (or perhaps I'm completely off base here). Anyway, there was no one else to the left of me. The thing was, I didn't know for sure if I was making her uncomfortable; I know on some level I was, but hopefully not in a bad way? What's your take on the situation? I am reading too much into this? I think its cute you were trying to read her body language.....I love the show lie to me.....all I can see from what you have written is you like this girl and I give this advice for this reason..and it is given because what i read from your language....Don't worry about rejection.....wanting to ask someone out to get to know them better.... is a risk you have to take because if you don't, you are missing out on possibilty because you are hoping that her body language is positive towards you.... i hope that it is too.....dont leave your plan too long.....dive in and if the water is cold......doesnt mean the next time you dive in its going to be cold again.....from the commercial Nike written i think for you....JUST DO IT......good luck and I require an update for my romantic heart it needs its fix...i have writers block with romance..deb
Author VV27 Posted July 20, 2012 Author Posted July 20, 2012 Thank you for your comments. Unfortunately, my over-analysis (especially where body language is concerned) gets the better of me all too often when I am presented with a potentially romantic situation. I am a fan (hopefully not a product) of shows like Lie to Me and House. And as well and good (and thought provoking) as they are, in the end, I think all of the information and analysis such artistry (if one should call it that) inspire and provokes in me (romantically) is extreme cautiousness; which, practiced enough, perhaps is just a sophisticated form of masochism. I read one woman wrongly in the past, and was rejected as a result (and maybe that's part of my inclination to want to quantify and make hard-to-read emotion more tangible; it was a blow for my heart and my foolish pride), but I'm not going to let that deter me now. Thank you all for your words! I suppose I'll see what happens next week. I'll let ya know.
norajane Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 If you ask women out right away when you meet them or when you realize you'd like to get to know them better (instead of observing them for weeks), you won't be so invested in them if they reject you, so a rejection won't be so painful.
Oxy Moronovich Posted July 20, 2012 Posted July 20, 2012 What are you doing trying to date a chick at your workplace?
amantis Posted July 21, 2012 Posted July 21, 2012 Thank you for your comments. Unfortunately, my over-analysis (especially where body language is concerned) gets the better of me all too often when I am presented with a potentially romantic situation. I am a fan (hopefully not a product) of shows like Lie to Me and House. And as well and good (and thought provoking) as they are, in the end, I think all of the information and analysis such artistry (if one should call it that) inspire and provokes in me (romantically) is extreme cautiousness; which, practiced enough, perhaps is just a sophisticated form of masochism. I read one woman wrongly in the past, and was rejected as a result (and maybe that's part of my inclination to want to quantify and make hard-to-read emotion more tangible; it was a blow for my heart and my foolish pride), but I'm not going to let that deter me now. Thank you all for your words! I suppose I'll see what happens next week. I'll let ya know. WOW loool ,man come on ... too much thinking ... Just ask her out , i dont even know what to say .
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