Chunky Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 My girlfriend and I have been dating for a few months. She's been cheated on in the past and abused by her ex husband. She's a wonderful woman who is very good to me. She has a wall up in our relationship because she's been hurt so many times that she is protecting herself from emotional pain. I realize that I had nothing to do with this but I hope someday she'll put her wall down. I feel like I'm being punished sometimes because of what someone else did. I know I have no reason to though. So, this is for the ladies, how long does it take a woman to lower her walls?
Philosoraptor Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 It all depends on the person. Waiting for someone to take their walls down is a very hard thing and it takes a ton of patience. When one backs off of it though it just reenforces to that person that the walls are necessary and the wall gets taller. In many ways you are being punished for the wrongs of another but if you decide that this person is worth it you'll stick it out through all of confusion and pain that comes with giving yourself to someone who has walls up. Why are you afraid you'll hurt her though? Do you have intentions to bring her pain? If not then don't worry about it. 1
Algermas Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 It'll take a few month before she goes back to the love of her life.
Author Chunky Posted July 10, 2012 Author Posted July 10, 2012 It all depends on the person. Waiting for someone to take their walls down is a very hard thing and it takes a ton of patience. When one backs off of it though it just reenforces to that person that the walls are necessary and the wall gets taller. In many ways you are being punished for the wrongs of another but if you decide that this person is worth it you'll stick it out through all of confusion and pain that comes with giving yourself to someone who has walls up. Why are you afraid you'll hurt her though? Do you have intentions to bring her pain? If not then don't worry about it. No, I love her very much and eventually want to marry her. I'm not afraid I'll hurt her. She's just scared of being hurt. We had a long talk last night and I told her just how much she means to me. I think about her all the time and miss her when she's gone. I look forward to seeing her and I always want to be with he but not smothering her though
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