Shosh Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Hi, I was dating this guy for a few weeks who I really liked, but from the start he made it clear he was not looking for a serious, long-term relationship but only for fun and for some reason I still decided to date him. We had a good time on the dates, but in between he would often ignore me for days, make dates at the last second and lately always break them at the last minute too without any sign of remorse. He did this to me three times this week, today was the latest. An hour before we are supposed to meet he sends me text saying he can't make it and we should try for another day. So finally I told him that I don't want to do this anymore, am tired of him canceling our dates at the last moment and believe that we should go our separate ways. So at first he got really defensive and said that he is working 12+ hour shifts at work and that I should be a little understanding, but finally he said he does not want to break up, he just wants me to be a little more patient. He also said that he would love to keep on dating me, but it is my choice. In my head I know I made the right decision, because if you care about someone you don't cancel your dates an hour before without even apologizing. Also, he goes out every night on the weekends and never asks me to join him or his friends or - G-d forbid - make plans with me instead of his friends! But it is still difficult because I really liked him and I wonder if made a mistake. What do you guys think?
Sugarkane Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 You totally did the right thing. My Ex started manipulating me and treating me like dirt at the end, then gaslighting me. I really wish I did what you did instead of trying to figure out what to do, only to be dumped really cruelly. 1
Author Shosh Posted July 10, 2012 Author Posted July 10, 2012 Thanks Sugar. When I go through all the reasons I had in my head, it is a clear-cut decision. But when I think about how happy I felt when we were together, I start to doubt myself.
Appleness Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Geez, why on earth will you be patient for someone who wants a non-serious relationship? Casual relationship are just that: casual. Meaning that you get to stick around while it makes you feel good. If you work for it, then shouldn't there be something to work towards?
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