GKM Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 How do you know how high to set the bar on dating expectations? What is too little effort for you on a guys part, and what makes you happy? I'd just like to know what the norm is in courting these days
Arabella Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 A few simple things... - Initiate contact regularly (2-3 times a week). Phone calls preferred, texts are fine if he's consistent and quick to respond. - Not make a big deal out of money. I don't want to hear anything about who pays for what. If he picks up the first check, I'll happily pick up the next. Whatever. I am a professional woman and money should be a non-issue for either of us. - I'm a lady, and I expect to be respected. Gentleman-like behavior is highly appreciated. If he tries to get sexual with me during the first date, there will be no second date. - He needs to be decisive and clear as to what he wants or expects. If he wants a commitment, he must ask for it.. if he doesn't see it working that way, I would like to know about it too... sooner, rather than later. That's about it. I think it's pretty much common sense but nonetheless... -A 1
Author GKM Posted July 2, 2012 Author Posted July 2, 2012 A few simple things... - Initiate contact regularly (2-3 times a week). Phone calls preferred, texts are fine if he's consistent and quick to respond. - Not make a big deal out of money. I don't want to hear anything about who pays for what. If he picks up the first check, I'll happily pick up the next. Whatever. I am a professional woman and money should be a non-issue for either of us. - I'm a lady, and I expect to be respected. Gentleman-like behavior is highly appreciated. If he tries to get sexual with me during the first date, there will be no second date. - He needs to be decisive and clear as to what he wants or expects. If he wants a commitment, he must ask for it.. if he doesn't see it working that way, I would like to know about it too... sooner, rather than later. That's about it. I think it's pretty much common sense but nonetheless... -A Great list, very reasonable expectations I think Do you expect him to be more romantic eg. woo you? Flowers, chocolates and that sort of thing, or do you have a more modern version of romance?
todreaminblue Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 How do you know how high to set the bar on dating expectations? What is too little effort for you on a guys part, and what makes you happy? I'd just like to know what the norm is in courting these days I have not worked this dating thing out at all....its a minefield full of emails with photos of penises.....its very hard to know which penis has a sense of humour when i figure it out....i will let you know.....deb 1
Author GKM Posted July 2, 2012 Author Posted July 2, 2012 I have not worked this dating thing out at all....its a minefield full of emails with photos of penises.....its very hard to know which penis has a sense of humour when i figure it out....i will let you know.....deb oh my, that cracked me up
january2011 Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 Off the top of my head, in no particular order: Open, honest, timely and regular communication tempered with kindness and respectExclusivity (multi-daters need not apply)Clear life and relationship goalsEmotionally, mentally, physically and financially available to dateBasic hygieneSerious about looking for an LTR that might lead to marriage and kids This is my list, so I couldn't tell you how close to the norm it is.
Arabella Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 Do you expect him to be more romantic eg. woo you? Flowers, chocolates and that sort of thing, or do you have a more modern version of romance? Expect? No. I am somewhat old-fashioned in romance, but I am also young (28, for context) and realize that it's really just not the norm in society anymore. However, if a guy brings me little gifts occasionally, it is very appreciated. If nothing else, because it shows he thinks about me. -A
Author GKM Posted July 2, 2012 Author Posted July 2, 2012 Off the top of my head, in no particular order: Open, honest, timely and regular communication tempered with kindness and respectExclusivity (multi-daters need not apply)Clear life and relationship goalsEmotionally, mentally, physically and financially available to dateBasic hygieneSerious about looking for an LTR that might lead to marriage and kidsThis is my list, so I couldn't tell you how close to the norm it is. Do you ever stray from this list? For example, would you work with someone who had emotional blocks be becoming close to you as baggage from a relationship? Or do you only go for baggage free people?
LittlePrince Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 Or do you only go for baggage free people? What like newborns?
january2011 Posted July 2, 2012 Posted July 2, 2012 Do you ever stray from this list? For example, would you work with someone who had emotional blocks be becoming close to you as baggage from a relationship? Or do you only go for baggage free people? Yes, I do stray from the list, though not so much that the list becomes invalid. In my dating pool, everyone has baggage of some sort. This means that I have to go by degrees of baggage rather than binary absolutes.
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