irc333 Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 Okay, I want some feedback from both men and women on here, from BOTH perspectives. I had been at a party, house party that is, where a good amount of people know each other pretty well for the past few months to the past couple of years. Familiarity with each other was prominent, so nothing too awkward to getting to know some people, because a lot of people know each other pretty well, with an occasional newbie here and there. I had seen a couple of guys, giving random shoulder massages to women (all of them are single/unattached people). Though, not necessarily a couple, I've seen that, and other acts of affection going on. Like instead of both people holding drinks, and just conversing face to face, I'd see a guy having one drink in his hand, while the other was around a woman's waist while conversing....and she didn't seem to really take offense to it...though, she might be tolerating it , but also, they probably know these people well enough to let it slide. Or some even seem receptive to it, (maybe it's the drinks loosening them up, I dunno) Some of the women even like the neck massages. Me, for one, don't see myself doing that randomly to women that I'm not dating. Can I get any feedback from people here that would not feel comfortable doing that to other women (the men doing it to the women) or as women, are you more of a "keep your hands to yourself" kind of lady? I think some feel free to do it (or even the women let it happen) simply because they're both single and it's a moot point. Others might have boundaries on this and just keep their hands to themselves. Anyone? Again, keep in mind, these are people that familiar with each other.
runner Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 i'm a bit on the touchy side so i don't see it as a big deal with people i'm close with. altho the standing around with my arm around a girl seems a bit boyfriend'y to me so if i didn't see someone that way i wouldn't go there. massages are pretty harmless IMO.
Phennyphen Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 I have certain friends I'm very touchy feely with, not in a sexual way, but we're just very comfortable with each other kind of way. I guess it depends on the friendship and the person.
ThingsAreComplicated Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 no problem here either (male). in my circle of good friends back in the days of high school and college this was pretty common, we sometimes also slept in the same bed and stuff (without anything "happening"). It really depends on how close you are.
ladyabstrused Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 Well, if I'm single I think it's fine. But I wouldn't tolerate my guy buddies to have their arms on my waist..I personally think that's a bit more intimate. Boyfriend, sure. Not a friend. My guy buddy would have his arm over my shoulders (back then) and I would be fine, like what TAC above said, depends how close you are with each other. Massaging plutonically is also fine I think but you know sometimes massages can be of a different type. I'm talking about those non-sensual ones lol. All that said, those touchy stuff don't apply when in a relationship.
Phennyphen Posted June 30, 2012 Posted June 30, 2012 no problem here either (male). in my circle of good friends back in the days of high school and college this was pretty common, we sometimes also slept in the same bed and stuff (without anything "happening"). It really depends on how close you are. Agreed, I've got a small group of friends who I always end up in bed (asleep ) with after drunken nights ou, nothing has ever happened and its never been that kind of situation, its literally that we are all just drunk and happy to spoon haha
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