ThaWholigan Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 *Scratches head* Why wouldn't a guy want to be a player? I always assume most aren't, because it's so much work. But if girls were throwing themselves at his feet, or he could have a lot of FWB/NSA sex, why wouldn't a guy jump at that? Granted, I think that once guys meet that perfect, awesome, amazing girl, they'd give up their player ways, but until then... Clearly the concept of individualism is lost on some people . I think I would rather have a monogamous relationship with a girl than have millions of FWBs and ONSs on the go . Granted, I wouldn't turn down either depending on the circumstance, but still......
oaks Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 *Scratches head* Why wouldn't a guy want to be a player? I always assume most aren't, because it's so much work. You may have answered your own question here. I'm sure many more guys would be happy with 'just sex' if it was freely available, but for the vast majority (even most of the 'players') it just doesn't work like that. Then, of course, there are guys who actually value the things you can get by having a relationship. Shocking, I know! 1
Quest4_TheLost Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 We women will give plenty of signals if we like you . Complimenting you, the way we look at you.. Even the way we talk to you. Is she talking to you more like just a friend? Its really not that hard to follow your instincts.. If you feel that *spark* with someone you'll know.. Not everyone you date is going to be a right match for you. You'll find the inner you is more picky then you are, as in (just wanting sex).. Also attraction and a *spark* are diffrent. There are plenty of attractive ppl out there. But if I don't feel that spark with somone I'm not interested in kissing them.. Now that could develope over time. On the other hand I've never stopped dating a guy because we hadn't kissed. I can tell when a guy is interested in me or not by the communication between us. Unless the guy or girl is all over the place sending mixed signals and playing games. I say watch out for the signs,your gut feeling and when the moment is right you'll know.. If your having any doubts about it, its because its not right..
joystickd Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 *Scratches head* Why wouldn't a guy want to be a player? I always assume most aren't, because it's so much work. But if girls were throwing themselves at his feet, or he could have a lot of FWB/NSA sex, why wouldn't a guy jump at that? Granted, I think that once guys meet that perfect, awesome, amazing girl, they'd give up their player ways, but until then... Most guys when it comes to dating and attraction the most common question starts out with "There is this one woman" key word being one woman. Most guys start out with oneitis. How many threads up here have you seen where men say "There are two or three woman I want" it always start out with one because contrary to popular belief most men want relationships. The problem comes when you attempt to find a woman worthy of being in a relationship with. You want to have a high quality woman in your life and also contrary to popular belief high quality doesn't mean looking like a model. There are beautiful women that are low quality. In the process of this desires kick in and you have sex with some of these low quality women. 1
joystickd Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 You may have answered your own question here. I'm sure many more guys would be happy with 'just sex' if it was freely available, but for the vast majority (even most of the 'players') it just doesn't work like that. Then, of course, there are guys who actually value the things you can get by having a relationship. Shocking, I know! The thought of that to some women is horrifying.
oaks Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 The thought of that to some women is horrifying. Because it's easier to demonise us than believe we might want a relationship? or why? 1
fortyninethousand322 Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 Women literally preach they do not want guys who push for sex or too much physical contact too soon. all fine and dandy. but if a guy doesn't 'go for the kiss' within a couple of dates, she ditches him. why? Is it wrong for a guy to get to know a woman as a person before starting the physical stuff? Men are supposed to be the initiators. Period. Stop complaining about it and go initiate.
RedRobin Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 Would you feel better if I agreed with you? As with anything else, dating requires some effort on your part. You can either accept things the way they are and run with it, or you can put in some effort to find the ones that comply with your expectations. .. or he could avoid OLD and those who have developed habits based on OLD and meet women in other ways where he has a chance to get to know them first. OP, if most of the women you are meeting are with OLD, then yea, I agree with the others. My observation is that most men and women doing OLD have a different set of values and seem to think that someone isn't worth knowing or dating until they check out how their genitals fit. No kidding. Hang on LS for awhile and you'll see that.
RedRobin Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 contrary to popular belief most men want relationships. Prove it. The problem comes when you attempt to find a woman worthy of being in a relationship with. Or she decides you are not worthy of being in a relationship with her. You want to have a high quality woman in your life and also contrary to popular belief high quality doesn't mean looking like a model. There are beautiful women that are low quality. In the process of this desires kick in and you have sex with some of these low quality women. Then that makes you a man not worthy of a high-quality woman... I think it is time you stop whining and making excuses and just keep a grip on your man parts for a change.
joystickd Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 Because it's easier to demonise us than believe we might want a relationship? or why? Yeah it makes it easier to demonize men. It gives them a sense of solidarity when men are demonized. Look at the fringe females when they post on here they get a crapload of like from other female users. The female "support system" in action. I will say this if a woman deals with men and all they want is sex its time to consider her role in the equation.
RedRobin Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 Because it's easier to demonise us than believe we might want a relationship? or why? It's also alot easier to keeping telling women we should go on faith that you want a relationship and expecting her to f*ck you on the off-chance you might be telling the truth... while you continue to date other women... ... than it is to actually show her want a relationship with her by proving it with your actions.
joystickd Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 Prove it. Or she decides you are not worthy of being in a relationship with her. Then that makes you a man not worthy of a high-quality woman... I think it is time you stop whining and making excuses and just keep a grip on your man parts for a change. I was just making a point. Hey I'm far from whining and the funny thing is like I said before I can meet someone and get to them on a certain level and those "standards" they claim to have go right out the door. A woman like you that sounds bitter but claims not to be is so laughable because they look for a certain set of criteria and have certain expectations about the negative aspects of men and think they know it all and exactly what to look for. They get deceived on the highest level because they look for that and not really open to other possibilities. Another funny thing about the jaded is their "warnings" about the pitfalls of dating because like I say numerous times some of you all couldn't recognize a player or golddigger if it had its mouth on your genitals. I have a firm grip on my man parts and so does some women. I'm not looking for a relationship and I am honest about it. It would be a whole lot easier to lie to get a piece of a$$ but I chose the road less traveled called honesty. Women have such a low threshold that constitutes men being players that if they were men every woman would be a slut.
RedRobin Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 I will say this if a woman deals with men and all they want is sex its time to consider her role in the equation. That's true. Starting with avoiding men who feel the need to push for sex ASAP to prove their manhood... ... and dumping men with double standards... That would be a good way of avoiding men who have a habit of using women for sex. Yep.
joystickd Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 It's also alot easier to keeping telling women we should go on faith that you want a relationship and expecting her to f*ck you on the off-chance you might be telling the truth... while you continue to date other women... ... than it is to actually show her want a relationship with her by proving it with your actions. Taking the easy route and demonizing I see:lmao: http://www.randomli.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/girl_cry.png
joystickd Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 That's true. Starting with avoiding men who feel the need to push for sex ASAP to prove their manhood... ... and dumping men with double standards... That would be a good way of avoiding men who have a habit of using women for sex. Yep. You are not used if you have an understanding of what's going on. That makes you a willing participant.
joystickd Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 That's true. Starting with avoiding men who feel the need to push for sex ASAP to prove their manhood... ... and dumping men with double standards... That would be a good way of avoiding men who have a habit of using women for sex. Yep. That still doesn't include the woman's role in the equation. I mean don't women judge more than men and have double standards tool
RedRobin Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 I was just making a point. Hey I'm far from whining and the funny thing is like I said before I can meet someone and get to them on a certain level and those "standards" they claim to have go right out the door. Don't blame me for your social circle or dating habits. A woman like you that sounds bitter but claims not to be is so laughable because they look for a certain set of criteria and have certain expectations about the negative aspects of men and think they know it all and exactly what to look for. So far so good, for the most part. Nearly all of my interactions with men that made it past a few dates have resulted in LTR's. They get deceived on the highest level because they look for that and not really open to other possibilities. Really? What possibility would that be? Another funny thing about the jaded is their "warnings" about the pitfalls of dating because like I say numerous times some of you all couldn't recognize a player or golddigger if it had its mouth on your genitals. What's funny is that you think the rest of the world swims with the same circle of turds in your cess pool.
Feelsgoodman Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 This also goes for a few other rules: If he has not paid for a meal / drink, he's cheap and selfish. If he has not contacted me within 24-48 hours afterward, he will be a friend. Albeit he won't be a good friend, but if I continue to see him afterward somehow he will just be a friend. If he has not gone for a kiss by the second get together (and there is nothing wrong with his saying "I'm going to kiss you now, is that ok?" and the woman says "Sure."), he never will. Because he doesn't have much guts. I can see why you have trouble meeting men...
joystickd Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 Don't blame me for your social circle or dating habits. So far so good, for the most part. Nearly all of my interactions with men that made it past a few dates have resulted in LTR's. Really? What possibility would that be? What's funny is that you think the rest of the world swims with the same circle of turds in your cess pool. This explains what I am talking about. Emotions. I am merely offering my opinion so comments about my social circle or dating habit from you are : . I only make a point that women like you that claim to know about players are not open to the possibility that look are deceiving. Actually my cess pool is an excellent place to be maybe you should vacation there. Your attempts at insulting me are futile.
RedRobin Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 I only make a point that women like you that claim to know about players are not open to the possibility that look are deceiving. Why should I be open to that possibility? So far my results have proven otherwise. I've attempted to give other women suggestions on how to spot players, since, apparently, my results seem to be pretty good. If other men who are legitimately looking for relationships want to whine about being confused with 'players' they can stop acting like them or emulating them. Easy.
joystickd Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 Why should I be open to that possibility? So far my results have proven otherwise. I've attempted to give other women suggestions on how to spot players, since, apparently, my results seem to be pretty good. If other men who are legitimately looking for relationships want to whine about being confused with 'players' they can stop acting like them or emulating them. Easy. This is so laughable. Your results work on thirsty men and posers that want to be players but my definition of a player is different than yours so therein lies the issue. I know for me a player has a lot of underlying qualities that are positive and one thing that distinguishes them from the thirsty guys are their ability to be flexible in any situation with women. The players I learned from are straight forward with their intentions but that doesn't mean they push for sex. It means if they are not looking for a relationship they say that in the beginning and if she continues with him she is not being used because she is fully aware of what's going on and is a willing participant. If you had actually read what I had been saying I was meaning that you should be open to the possibility that a player is not in the form you are used to. I never mentioned about someone being confused with players. I said women oftentimes can't recognize one in the same way men couldn't recognize golddiggers. Next time really take the time to read and not get so emotional because a man talks or even offers the remote possibility that men are not always out for sex. You responses and insults said so much and my assumption was right I guess.
ThaWholigan Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 Why should I be open to that possibility? So far my results have proven otherwise. I've attempted to give other women suggestions on how to spot players, since, apparently, my results seem to be pretty good. If other men who are legitimately looking for relationships want to whine about being confused with 'players' they can stop acting like them or emulating them. Easy. I would argue that the only way they get any attention from women is "acting like a player". It really depends on how one uses the term "player" and what attributes they have.
William Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 Hey folks, let's stow the turds and cesspools and other personally focused remarks and remain focused on the excellent topic before us. Dating is enough of a quagmire for many without slinging the mud at each other. Thanks.
SJC2008 Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 The irony. OP's thread is about wanting to take it slow and if you don't make a move you'll lose her and many women are saying all guys want is sex. There are women who won't jump into the sack right away.
Recommended Posts