Seductive Posted June 24, 2012 Posted June 24, 2012 In my early to mid 30's and still single. It sux that it is so hard to find a decent guy these days. All the ones I seem to meet turn out to be players or jerks. No matter where I meet them. Get pretty down about it at times. Especially when I see most people around me getting paired up lately this year. Maybe I am cursed or something... I'm going to share with you a simple secret. Your life will mirror back the thoughts that you have. Maybe your experiences have caused you to feel this way (understandable), but you will keep attracting the same type of guys the more you ask such questions. Write a list of all the traits that you want in a mate, and work on becoming the ideal mate. Do a vision board where you cut photos out of what you want to see in relationships. Meditate daily and focus on the man that you want to attract. Think positive and have faith that such men out there exist. Don't worry when these men aren't showing up. Focus on you becoming the mate you want to attract, and it will happen. I promise.
joystickd Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 Yes, it was true. I hung out with guys as friends. We were buddies. We were all rather immature (like the guys on LS), although some guys did date other women. Funnily enough, some of my female friends thought I must have been having sex with all of them. I was tall and very thin. I almost never wore dresses or skirts. I was asked to model once when I was in NYC but knew I'd have to undress in front of strangers so declined. I was a virgin until I was 28. My dating life didn't really start until after forty, thanks to online dating, the Lefkoe Method and a head to toe makeover physically and in attitude. So it's never too late! (I guess that blows your theory) I am excluded in that lol
joystickd Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 Any girl in her late teens dating a man in his thirties is a golddigger. Not if she genuinely thinks she is attractive because if you have a strong desire for someone the thought of using them is forgotten. You sound like the fringe females on here that claim men don't want relationships. In the real world everyone has different motivations when it comes to dating and the day you accept that is the day your situation will drastically improve for the better.
FitChick Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 Yes I imagined FC to be in her 20's, at the most 30's too. Maybe that explains why guys in that age group are attracted to me in real life. I generally prefer men in their fifties online. I want someone settled and mature in life and career but still fit and youthful like I am.
kaylan Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 (edited) I get soooo sick of the bitter butt hurt crowd assuming that anyone whos single yet longing for the right person, is only single because they ignored decent people for douchebags and bitches. Have any of you considered that many people want the RIGHT person for them?...and not just any ole decent person? You know...the special person you click with more than anyone else. You know how rare it is to find that person? Ive only had that feeling twice in 10 years of dating (im 25). And its not like I avoid every decent girl and date the bitches. And its not like all women ignore all the decent guys in lieu of the azzholes. Some people want that right feeling and dont wanna settle. So quit with the bitter assumptions because youre mad you got passed over before. Dating can really be about luck of the draw and hopefully matching up with someone in your area. Considering how unique everyone is, it can be hard finding the right person. Edited June 25, 2012 by kaylan 5
kaylan Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 (edited) Women demanded to go to school and have careers, don't put that on men. The fatal flaw in this is that men couldn't care less about careers when it comes to women. Desirablility in women comes largely from their physical attractiveness, which goes into a freefall somewhere between their mid twenties and early thirties. Theres a thread on the first page of the dating forum with several guys saying a chicks career matters to them. In todays world plenty of guys care about a chicks career and educational background...especially because most people were raised in two income households. So times have changed and your assumptions are very incorrect. And plenty of guys dont care just about a girls looks. Its not like plenty of guys looks dont free fall either...and since women are the ones who get approached, they can afford to be choosier about looks. And in my experience women can be just as visual as men. I wish men and women would stop crying about people caring about looks. Physical attraction matters a lot to some people. You gotta deal with it. Being in great shape is a big help in getting a mate. Edited June 25, 2012 by kaylan
Bristolius Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 Weird. One of my posts in this thread is gone. Why would that happen?
jobaba Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 I was never asked out in my early 20s and had literally NO options. I have more options now than I ever have; doesn't mean they are good options - just that they beat nothing which I got when I was supposedly at my best. I also have zero regrets over all the men I rejected. If I saw them today, I would reject them all over again I rarely dated at all in college or in my twenties because no one asked me out. In my thirties, I dated someone famous who was recently featured in Vanity Fair (much to my surprise when I turned the page). Many years after that (I was "middle-aged") one of People Magazine's Sexiest Men Alive chatted me up and flirted with me. I was so rattled by his attentions that I ran off muttering, "I'm late for a meeting" as he uttered, "Would you like to go ...?" I was absolutely terrified! He was eleven years younger and stone cold sober, by the way. I dread ever running into him again for fear he'd remember me as the only woman who'd ever turned him down. Don't get your knickers in a twist when people on LS try to wind you up. Their view/experience of the world tends to be somewhat limited. If that is true, then I'll change my perspective a bit. I've seen pictures of one of you, and it would be surprising to know you've had trouble with men. Maybe you guys weren't too friendly towards men as a whole in general ... which in retrospect is somewhat a good thing. Some guys fall easily for women and you don't want to lead unattractive guys on...
veggirl Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 It's weird how many rich, successful, handsome 30something year old men who date 22 yr olds have started hanging out on LS to share their "wisdom" with all of us :confused: 2
Algermas Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 Theres a thread on the first page of the dating forum with several guys saying a chicks career matters to them. In todays world plenty of guys care about a chicks career and educational background...especially because most people were raised in two income households. So times have changed and your assumptions are very incorrect. And plenty of guys dont care just about a girls looks. Its not like plenty of guys looks dont free fall either...and since women are the ones who get approached, they can afford to be choosier about looks. And in my experience women can be just as visual as men. I wish men and women would stop crying about people caring about looks. Physical attraction matters a lot to some people. You gotta deal with it. Being in great shape is a big help in getting a mate. That would be because most men will say anything, even online, to butter up to a set of ovaries.
Algermas Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 It's weird how many rich, successful, handsome 30something year old men who date 22 yr olds have started hanging out on LS to share their "wisdom" with all of us :confused: I find it equally amazing to find this entire forum brimming with highly educated, amazingly preserved 30+ year old former models.
Bristolius Posted June 25, 2012 Posted June 25, 2012 It's weird how many rich, successful, handsome 30something year old men who date 22 yr olds have started hanging out on LS to share their "wisdom" with all of us :confused: It's almost...hard to believe.
kaylan Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 (edited) Hey Diva, how come you never ask the 'Why' to that 'What' ? In other words, why do people make those assumptions? Women, and Kaylan, are perfectionists to a fault. You need to come down to earth and realize that you shouldn't reject people over something small and dumb as long as there's attraction and values are compatible. You're like one of those people who would reject a woman because her 2nd toe is longer than her first and say that's why she wasn't "right" for you Im not a perfectionist at all. I just know its hard to find the right person. And I know how rare it is to fall head over heels for someone. Not everyone falls for just any decent ole guy or gal. Not everyone is desperate to have someone. You dont know what I reject girls over, so its stupid of you to assume I reject them over small things. Do you realize how variable peoples values are? So its not like everyone can easily match up with just anybody. Personality is the defining factor in if ill fall for a girl or not. And theres a lot that goes into someones personality. That would be because most men will say anything, even online, to butter up to a set of ovaries. Lmao. Be in denial all you want. Not every man thinks like you, and you dont speak for the majority of men...not at all. Times have changed, and plenty of dudes definitely dig a chick with an awesome education and career. Why am I attracted to business women, musicians, and lawyers? Because I went to school for business and Im a musician. Plus I was raised by parents who went to law school. (dads a lawyer, moms a teacher) Itd make sense Id want a girl similar to me and my background. Plus I find strong, confident women very sexy. And why wouldnt I want to date someone with the same interests as me? Edited June 27, 2012 by kaylan 1
seachangeoflove Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 If that is true, then I'll change my perspective a bit. I've seen pictures of one of you, and it would be surprising to know you've had trouble with men. Maybe you guys weren't too friendly towards men as a whole in general ... which in retrospect is somewhat a good thing. Some guys fall easily for women and you don't want to lead unattractive guys on... you keep saying women reject you for your looks and that you are ugly. have you thought it's your attitude that is so foul? i mean really......read that post and tell me you don't sound like a douche?
WeAllMightBeNuts Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 In my early to mid 30's and still single. It sux that it is so hard to find a decent guy these days. All the ones I seem to meet turn out to be players or jerks. No matter where I meet them. Get pretty down about it at times. Especially when I see most people around me getting paired up lately this year. Maybe I am cursed or something... The problem is not men. The problem is you. Fix you, and you fix the problem. I guarantee it.
veggirl Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 I'm wondering where these disgruntled men live if their local women turn into hags and fall apart when they turn 30. Appalachia? North Dakota? Mississippi? Maybe these guys are equally toothless and fat. You need to move! There are lots of desirable, gorgeous women over 30 in all major US cities. A lot of them date rich, successful men their own age or (gasp!) younger. Shocking I know! Wait, I liked this, but I am originally from North Dakota I find it equally amazing to find this entire forum brimming with highly educated, amazingly preserved 30+ year old former models. Who? Bet I can name more of the men FTR, I am 29 (does that count as 30? Practically right?) and never claimed to be a "former model" (nor have I noticed any others!) but am attractive / slim / not a hag / not "unpreserved" (what's that mean? preserved? I don't have any work done, so I guess I am unpreserved then!?) and have posted my picture plenty of times.
FitChick Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 Wait, I liked this, but I am originally from North Dakota The best and the brightest always leave for greener pastures.
jobaba Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 (edited) If that is true, then I'll change my perspective a bit. I've seen pictures of one of you, and it would be surprising to know you've had trouble with men. Maybe you guys weren't too friendly towards men as a whole in general ... which in retrospect is somewhat a good thing. Some guys fall easily for women and you don't want to lead unattractive guys on... you keep saying women reject you for your looks and that you are ugly. have you thought it's your attitude that is so foul? i mean really......read that post and tell me you don't sound like a douche? Nope. I actually thought it was a compliment. But lay it on me. Tell me how it was insulting. Or better yet another female poster could tell me how it was insulting. I've read through some of your posts and I'm not sure you're someone to be dishing out constructive criticism... Edited June 27, 2012 by jobaba 1
6ft180natl Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 I rarely dated at all in college or in my twenties because no one asked me out. In my thirties, I dated someone famous who was recently featured in Vanity Fair (much to my surprise when I turned the page). Many years after that (I was "middle-aged") one of People Magazine's Sexiest Men Alive chatted me up and flirted with me. I was so rattled by his attentions that I ran off muttering, "I'm late for a meeting" as he uttered, "Would you like to go ...?" I was absolutely terrified! He was eleven years younger and stone cold sober, by the way. I dread ever running into him again for fear he'd remember me as the only woman who'd ever turned him down. Don't get your knickers in a twist when people on LS try to wind you up. Their view/experience of the world tends to be somewhat limited. Yea women are very flattered when celebrity men want to F**k them but most single men want to f**k all attractive women so I don't understand why. It seems kind of like me being flattered that an attractive woman doesn't mind me buying her a drink or dinner. /shrug
mortensorchid Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 I know how you feel. I look out at all the people before me, I see a few happy couples here and there who are mostly older people. And I look out and see all the lonely people out there too. For some reason they cannot, will not connect with others and they complain about it. And I also see the people who will not settled down with one woman, continue to bounce to and fro between as many as possible, or the same with women no matter how old they are. They are all such a******s. But, life goes on, doesn't it?
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 27, 2012 Posted June 27, 2012 I do think that in my early 20s, I wasn't very appealing. I wore baggy jeans and even baggier tops. I wore no make-up and had no idea how to make myself look good. I was nerdy, shy and awkward. Men just didn't notice me and looked straight past me to women who wore short skirts and were made up to the max. I wasn't too bothered because I was obsessed with school and winning scholarships. I didn't go out much. Only in my late 20s, I started coming into my own, learned how to dress, apply make-up, style my hair. I got more confident and friendly. That's why I laugh when men say that make-up and clothes don't matter. I was not only younger but also slightly slimmer in my early 20s and I got nothing! I lost my virginity to a personal trainer I met at my gym when I was 21. I wasn't in love. He was attractive and I just wanted to get it over with. I even had to invite myself over to his place... That's why it's really laughable when men on here use the age argument. Today, men make tons more effort in pursuing me and asking me out, despite my advanced age Lot of women DO get better with age
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