Algermas Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Stop acting like a complete A$shole Aging is an inevitable process. We all grow old and die somedays. Being an ageist is pathetic It's not about being an *******, it's about being honest.
ThaWholigan Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 ROFL! When ever I talk about entitlement and equivalent, people always get on my case. Obviously I'm not the only guy who thinks the same way. I stand corrected to a degree with this - Problem is of course that in conjunction with what people have to offer' date=' they are also offering a few less desirable things. It is human nature to downplay our flaws as well, and overestimate our virtues.[/quote'] So what you might think is an equivalent, is actually not. In your case, I think in theory you want an equivalent, but there are glaring pieces missing to your puzzle that disables you from being able to get that "equivalent". Now, you can get those pieces, but we've been down this road before, and I'm not going into it. Regarding ES, I don't recall much of her posting history, but I'll assume that she does have particularly high standards in principle, but that she's not quite stringent with them. How she has met so many "losers" is beyond me, but I'll refer myself back to d'Arthez' magnificent post and probably find the answer in there somewhere. It's not an insult as far as I can see. There are flaws that I have that I at least try to diminish to a degree.
Algermas Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Eh do you have anything better than that? Men that think like you are automatically excluded from my pool. That would be because I've never been poor enough to have to date women in their thirties. I don't have to have anything better than that, it alone is a significant reason why men of the calibre you're looking for won't go for you.
Algermas Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 it is because you are acting like a complete dickhead There's nothing wrong with women in their 30s as long as they take care of themselves. We all get old inevitably How so? It's a fact of life that the men ES describes can get, almost without limitations, any woman they want. Care to point out why they would want a model with maybe 3 good years left when they can get a carbon copy of her but at least a decade younger? We may all grow old but one gender is judged by accomplishment and the other by their physical attractiveness. Guess which of the two declines sharply with age. Ah you're 23, well that explains everything. Teenagers and guys in their early twenties tend to want to bang anything with a pulse. It's alright, taste refines with age.
jobaba Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 she is entitled to date whoever she wants, but you can't complain about not finding any guys when you have such high standards across the board I don't even think her standards are that high. I assume looks has been the major dealbreaker. Most guys I know have what she seeks. In terms of playing the one up monte game in terms of educational requirement, anything less than a doctorate is gar...boj... Anybody with 2 extra years of time and enough money could get a Masters...
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 A - even I was a decade younger, I would never look twice at a man with your attitude. I don't care if you are a model and a multi-millionare. Not all men think like that I can assure you.
Algermas Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 A - even I was a decade younger, I would never look twice at a man with your attitude. I don't care if you are a model and a multi-millionare. Not all men think like that I can assure you. Most men can't afford to think like I do, the likelyhood that they do increases the more they conform to your standards. 1
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I completely disagree with everything you say, I am out of this thread. OP - I am sorry for threadjacking.
iris219 Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 How she has met so many "losers" is beyond me, but I'll refer myself back to d'Arthez' magnificent post and probably find the answer in there somewhere. It's not an insult as far as I can see. There are flaws that I have that I at least try to diminish to a degree. She’s met so many losers because there are very few normal men who are over 30 and single. There are very few single men over 30 at all. I’ve said before that I’ve literally met two single men over 30 this year. I’m not kidding. Both were losers. I don’t even see single men my age from a distance. They are always with a girl, have on a wedding band, and/or are pushing a stroller. Most of us (women over 30) aren't rejecting nice guys or getting rejected by men who want younger women. We simply aren't meeting single men at all (and when we do it's clear why these men are single). I know so many awesome single women over 30 (who can barely get dates at all). I'm not sure why there are so few awesome single men the same age.
Algermas Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I know a ton of wealthy older guys married to women near their age range. You're being awfully ignorant here Men aren't really defined by their accomplishments nowadays. It's more like appearance and personality I know guys who make well over six figures who have average success with women and I know broke personal trainers who date supermodels. It's not the 1950s anymore It's not about taste. It's about human decency. You're acting like an a$shole in this thread Because they married her when they were both young, as we all know it's sometimes cheaper to keep her what with divorce laws in the US. Men are judged by looks and personality by women on the lower end of the desirability spectrum. Not all women have what it takes to dig gold. That would be because the guys with 6 figures don't know how to properly wield their wealth. It has nothing to do with human decency, I think lying to people is wrong and hence I avoid doing it. Unless im trying to get laid that is.
d'Arthez Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 So what you might think is an equivalent, is actually not. People tend to think of their qualities, but they don't really put it out there: - I collect dinky toys / baseball cards / Cosmo magazines / whatever. - I have a hangup for a sports team on the other side of the world, because my ex introduced me to the wonderful world of lacrosse. By the way, I am still not over him / her. - I have a history of bad credit - I have seen so much action that everything but scat porn is bland. - I require a penis of this size / I require a vagina with a certain tightness. - I am socially awkward. - I have a history of sleeping around, and I am not really sure if I ever want to be faithful. BTW, if an opportunity to upgrade comes by, you are out of the door! - I want nothing to do with people who have non-straight orientations. - I have been cheated on so often, that if I come across as paranoid, that is PAR for the course. So if you do find that I have torn the bed apart, that was because I thought you were cheating with some (man)whore! So it is YOUR fault if such a thing happens! These are just a few examples of qualities that people don't really share with the world, certainly not with relative strangers. Add to that, that people themselves have often a low threshold for accepting such things in others, and you have a recipe for a perpetual mismatch of expectations and romantic disappointment. Those are qualities that people can be aware of. However, a lot of people are not aware of their issues, or project them on past relationships, and people in their social environment. Which may apply to the original poster as well.
Bristolius Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Brutal, but probably accurate It's not brutal because the people on this forum makes very skewed sample. There are lots of people out there too busy living. They don't spend so much time keeping score.
Jane2011 Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Only read the first few responses, but want to ditto the people who have said you have to accept that you may never find the right guy. I would say, too, that you should stop thinking about it so much. It's just bringing you down. There is more to life than having a boyfriend or girlfriend. Surely there is something you're very interested in and passionate about. Throw yourself into that and cultivate great relationships with family and friends. And I'm not saying do these things "so that you'll find someone." Do those things and enjoy them and stop needing your existence validated by having a romantic partner. Also, it is important to be open-minded about potential partners. Give people a chance. At the same time, don't settle. 2
USMCHokie Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 I agree that guys don't care at all about finances or academic achievements Disagree here. Finances and academic achievements can often be a reflection of values, personality, and what you call 'mom-ability'. 2
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Actually, my ex who fits all these criteria rejected a pretty 21 year old girl that he met on the same night as me. He said he chose me because he was impressed by my job and "what the hell would I even talk about with a 21 year old?" He was 30 at the time and I was 32.
RedRobin Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Shouldn't you judge men more on their character rather than their job or education? Re-posted for emphasis... I'll admit to being shallow in a couple of areas. I'm really hard pressed to date anyone outside my age range (+/- five years or so)... and I'm a stickler for someone who takes care of himself. He doesn't have to be an adonis by any means... Just needs to be active and not fill his body with junk. Other than that, I could care less. Interestingly, I come across many men I could have a relationship with who are good looking and have money... but have poor character. So I pass.
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Re-posted for emphasis... I'll admit to being shallow in a couple of areas. I'm really hard pressed to date anyone outside my age range (+/- five years or so)... and I'm a stickler for someone who takes care of himself. He doesn't have to be an adonis by any means... Just needs to be active and not fill his body with junk. Other than that, I could care less. Interestingly, I come across many men I could have a relationship with who are good looking and have money... but have poor character. So I pass. Yep, good character is definitely at the top of my list.
USMCHokie Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Well on second thought, i would like to marry a girl who makes at least 40-50,000 a year because my goal is to make low six figures and it would be nice to not have to bring in ALL the money It's a non issue though because most girls nowadays make that sort of money anyways. In terms of mom-ability, you're a much better judge of that than I am but isn't it better to watch how they act with kids and their overall personality traits? It has less to do with the actually money they bring to the table and more to do with that values they place on accomplishment, their intelligence and way of thinking, and many other non-tangibles which are revealed from these basic "stats."
USMCHokie Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Yep, good character is definitely at the top of my list. Does Adonis-like fall around 3 or 4 on the list...?
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Does Adonis-like fall around 3 or 4 on the list...? Uh if I start thinking about your body I will never get to sleep (it's late here). 1
jobaba Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 It has less to do with the actually money they bring to the table and more to do with that values they place on accomplishment, their intelligence and way of thinking, and many other non-tangibles which are revealed from these basic "stats." I don't know about you Hoke, but in the Asian American circles I'm around, accomplishment is a ridiculous thing. I have a degree from a Top 25 school, a Masters degree, and soon another, and I feel like a COMPLETE slacker. More than half the people I know went to Ivy League schools and many of them are doctors and investment bankers. Not that I play that game or want to be in that crowd, but still... It's bad. Haha.
FitChick Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 It's interesting how everyone jumped to the usual conclusion that the OP was expecting Rich Super Model Athletic Man so wouldn't lower her standards. Playing devil's advocate here -- what if she wasn't up to the standards of men in her area? Maybe she isn't particularly desirable or attractive. You will never know. Food for thought... 1
somedude81 Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 She’s met so many losers because there are very few normal men who are over 30 and single. There are very few single men over 30 at all. I’ve said before that I’ve literally met two single men over 30 this year. I’m not kidding. Both were losers. I don’t even see single men my age from a distance. They are always with a girl, have on a wedding band, and/or are pushing a stroller. Most of us (women over 30) aren't rejecting nice guys or getting rejected by men who want younger women. We simply aren't meeting single men at all (and when we do it's clear why these men are single). I know so many awesome single women over 30 (who can barely get dates at all). I'm not sure why there are so few awesome single men the same age. My guess. The women who are over 30 and single missed the boat. They have nobody to blame but themselves. Most normal men 30+ are taken. All that's left are guys like me.
jobaba Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 It's interesting how everyone jumped to the usual conclusion that the OP was expecting Rich Super Model Athletic Man so wouldn't lower her standards. Playing devil's advocate here -- what if she wasn't up to the standards of men in her area? Maybe she isn't particularly desirable or attractive. You will never know. Food for thought... Because she said all she meets are players and jerks, which from my experience means she's attractive enough to pull guys, she just can't get the ones she wants. But whatever, I don't care, I'm just saying. My guess. The women who are over 30 and single missed the boat. They have nobody to blame but themselves. Most normal men 30+ are taken. All that's left are guys like me. I know you didn't intend it to be so, but... :lmao:
USMCHokie Posted June 23, 2012 Posted June 23, 2012 Uh if I start thinking about your body I will never get to sleep (it's late here). I just woke up...and I'm not wearing a shirt.
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