How can I get him to pursue me again? I can't stop thinking about him.. :/

[phineas]

Okay, maybe one day he'll come around..probably not, but I guess I won't contact him at all..

 

My guess is you haven't learned anything from this & will do it again with the next guy and still wonder what happened.

[xdxb]

Well, he texted me last night at 1am telling me he was at a nearby bar..I didn't respond. What should I do? I don't want to play games with him but I want him to know that this isn't okay.

[goldengirl11]

Well at least he is interested! I would get back to him.

[phineas]

Well, he texted me last night at 1am telling me he was at a nearby bar..I didn't respond. What should I do? I don't want to play games with him but I want him to know that this isn't okay.

 

You ignore him. Period.

 

You have now reduced yourself to booty call in his eyes with your actions.

sorry.

 

I've hit the same point with a woman who was playing games with me.

And she's 43.

 

So unless you want end up single like her in your 40's I suggest you stop playing games & don't respond to men who just want to use you for a drunken booty call.

[xdxb]

Well at least he is interested! I would get back to him.

 

I ended up telling him "Wtf I said hangout not text me super late when you're drunk. You may be cute but that is disrespectful"

 

he was like, "yeah you're right. i'm sorry. i was there with a bunch of people last night. don't really remember it"

 

 

idk what to say back..? maybe not respond at all?

[xdxb]

So unless you want end up single like her in your 40's I suggest you stop playing games & don't respond to men who just want to use you for a drunken booty call.

 

uh oh... so you're saying it's impossible to change his mind..? even if i become straight up with him..

[kaylan]

I ended up telling him "Wtf I said hangout not text me super late when you're drunk. You may be cute but that is disrespectful"

 

he was like, "yeah you're right. i'm sorry. i was there with a bunch of people last night. don't really remember it"

 

 

idk what to say back..? maybe not respond at all?

wtf...are you living in the real world? Im going to be very real with you here.

 

YOU say you only want to hook up. YOU play games, flake on him, and push him away. And then YOU refuse to go after him even though you want him because your self entitled, on a pedestal, princess mentality prevents you. And YOU also talk some bs about man hunter roles when he chased you at first and YOU screwed that up.

 

But then he contacts you to possibly hangout and give you what you want and you call him disrespectful? Im sorry, but youre a waste of time chick thatd be nothing but a pump and dump to me. And this guys a scrub for putting up with it. I would have told you off long ago for YOUR disrespect. How is he being disrespectful when YOU want to use him for ass anyways?

 

You got some nerve girl. And if dude was my friend, Id have already made sure he wasnt talking to you anymore. Hed be too busy out at the bar with me getting girls who dont play games and dont over inflate their own worth. Id teach him that men are prizes to be earned to and that women have to chase when they screw up. Why should we chase someone whos shot us down several time?

 

wow. No piece of tail is worth this much grief. I really wish I was this dudes friend so I could show him the light. Its amazing how some chicks do this kinda stuff because they think they are such hot stuff and better than the guy. I mean you even said he should value you...you the girl who kept rejecting him and even after that you refuse to chase him and show real interest....just wow

Edited June 22, 2012 by kaylan

[xdxb]

wtf...are you living in the real world?

 

YOU say you only want to hook up. YOU play games, flake on him, and push him away. And then YOU refuse to go after him even though you want him because you self entitled, on a pedestal, princess mentality prevents you. And YOU also talk some bs about man hunter roles when he chased you at first and YOU screwed that up.

 

But then he contacts you to possibly hangout and give you what you want and you call him disrespectful? Im sorry, but your a waste of time chick thatd be nothing but a pump and dump to me. And this guys a scrub for putting up with it. I would have told you off long ago for YOUR disrespect. How is he being disrespectful when YOU want to use him for ass anyways?

 

You got some nerve girl. And if dude was my friend, Id have already made sure he wasnt talking to you anymore. Hed be too busy out at the bar with me getting girls who dont play games and dont over inflate their own worth. Id teach him that men are prizes to be earned to and that women have to chase when they screw up. Why should we chase someone whos shot us down several time? wow

 

i'm not the only one playing games so stop trying to attack me. i want to stop. i'm not mad he contacted me, i'm mad he's treating me like a booty call. yes i do want to hook up with him but as the other user asked if i could see him as more, i'm willing to give it a shot.

[kaylan]

So its ok for you to initially see him as a piece of meat...but if he does it to you, you can get mad?

 

Talk about hypocrite. I cant believe he even let you call him out as "disrespectful" and even apologized to you. Thats a scrub move...that or hes naive and inexperienced with chicks. I mean hes only 21.

 

If he was perceptive like me...hed tell you "how dare you criticize me...when Im following your lead. Your actions are why I only see you in this way now. You saw me in that way as well...so whats the problem" How can you call the guy disrespectful when your disrespectful games is why he sees you the way he does now?

 

You cant change anything now girl. You screwed up and athletes have options....EASY options. So you have a very uphill and unwinnable battle if you are trying to get him to see you as more. I really cant understand how hes the bad guy for seeing you as simply a hookup when you did the same. Is that really how some girls think? "Its ok for me to see you as a good lay and use you for sex...but you cant see me that way because Im a lady and thats disrespectful"...?

 

P.S. - Constantly rejecting a guy and flaking on him, yet claiming to like him, while flirting with him and refusing to go after him, is most definitely game playing.

Edited June 22, 2012 by kaylan

[xdxb]

So its ok for you to initially see him as a piece of meat...but if he does it to you, you can get mad?

 

Talk about hypocrite. I cant believe he even let you call him out as "disrespectful" and even apologized to you. Thats a scrub move...that or hes naive and inexperienced with chicks. I mean hes only 21.

 

If he was perceptive like me...hed tell you "how dare you criticize me...when Im following your lead. Your actions are why I only see you in this way now. You saw me in that way as well...so whats the problem" How can you call the guy disrespectful when your disrespectful games is why he sees you the way he does now?

 

You cant change anything now girl. You screwed up and athletes have options....EASY options. So you have a very uphill and unwinnable battle if you are trying to get him to see you as more. I really cant understand how hes the bad guy for seeing you as simply a hookup when you did the same. Is that really how some girls think? "Its ok for me to see you as a good lay and use you for sex...but you cant see me that way because Im a lady and thats disrespectful"...?

 

Okay maybe I was just saying a good lay thing as a cover.. I don't actually know him. I'm a bit conflicted with dating right now because of this other guy I'm seeing who I'm trying to let go of. I guess I feel like I might be transferring my feelings..i'm inexperienced too I'm 20 and have only had one bf.. that's why I'm asking for advice

[jakelongot]

Okay maybe I was just saying a good lay thing as a cover.. I don't actually know him. I'm a bit conflicted with dating right now because of this other guy I'm seeing who I'm trying to let go of. I guess I feel like I might be transferring my feelings..i'm inexperienced too I'm 20 and have only had one bf.. that's why I'm asking for advice

 

You need to get your **** together. I understand though...you are young and inexperienced, but probably get a lot of attention from guys. The problem is you've been given this advice (not sure from a friend, TV or a magazine) that you need to play games.

 

Here is some good advice: Just be yourself and not play games. In the future if you like a guy and he asks you out or to hang, say yes. Don't be confusing and lay these traps and play games and create drama. Because if you get a guy who is into playing games and drama, chances are he is an emotional twit. Do you really want that? I don't know...maybe you do. Maybe you are looking for drama filled sex and figthing, because that is where that leads. That's okay too...plenty of women get off on drama.

 

However if you are interested in a real relationship, just be yourself. Don't worry about agreeing to hang out too fast when he asks. You won't seem easy. The only thing that makes women seem easy is having sex right away. As long as you wait 6 or 7 dates (seriously) before giving it up, he will respect you and you won't have to play games.

 

Good luck!