honeymel Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 My boyfriend and I were together 6 months when he got a good job in another state and moved. I stayed behind, at least for now. He's been gone 4 months and 2 months ago I flew down and spent a few days with him. Things were going good until the last week. He's trying to buy a house and was real excited when he found one he liked. He started the whole loan process last week, and since then has been real distant. He's not making contact with me, and when I get ahold of him, he is in a real bad mood. Things aren't going good with the bank he says and it's been really stressing him out. Tonight I got ahold of him, and things still weren't going good with it, and he was drinking (something he rarely does). I told him I've never seen him act like this, and he said sorry I'm just going to go to bed and wouldn't reply after that (through texting). I don't know if the distance is just from all the stress that comes along with buying a house (I've never bought, but I can imagine it is stressful) or if it's something to do with me and our relationship. He is in such a bad mood and down, I don't want to talk to him about it right now, but I'm literally starting to go crazy wondering if our relationship is in trouble. In the 10 months we have been together (and almost a year I have known him) he has never acted like this. Does it sound like our relationship is in trouble or just the stress from trying to buy a house? Is buying a house really that stressful? Thanks everyone
amantis Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 If i was in his position , i would never do that to my girlfriend , i would love her to call me and giving me support . You know what sucks ? long distance relationship . You like him , but do you think about moving and living with him ? if not how can you date him if he is far away ... i dont really believe in LDR , theres a time when everything starts to change , and thats what is happening with you , we start to ask questions and making excuses . He has his problems , and you have yours , think about yourself and if you can still dating him Dont waste time with someone who doest care about how you feel I dont know him and im not against your relationship , but do you see a future with him worth your time ? Think about this and good luck
Ninjainpajamas Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 The seems like a drastic change...It's concerning you didn't mention anything about the future of your relationship though.. - did you discuss moving there later with him? - Was this just to remain long-distance? - was there any future plans made? That has a big bearing on the future of this relationship, which Is why I'm surprised you mentioned nothing about that as If this just where you're at, at this point...which would not be a good sign. From my judgment based on my understanding of men and their nature, this is not a man just under stress...something has changed, meaning he might have met someone else or something else is going on, maybe he is trying to build some distance, maybe he decided that this long-distance thing isn't going to work so he's going to turn up the heat in his life and tell you how much it's stressing him out and pushing him away as an excuse. He's under stress, so he needs someone to vent to....who is he venting to other than you? who is comforting during this time? I doubt he is taking it on all alone...and being that he doesn't contact you and talk about this means to me that he doesn't feel he can count on you or that it will improve his mood. i get the sense that he is cutting you out of the equation here, neglecting you at the least. Based on what you said in this post, your relationship seems clearly in trouble.
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