One a half months since breakup.

[Winning]

It has been one and a half months since we broke up for good. We'd broken up once before when he said he wasn't 'bonding' to me after one month of dating, when he saw me bonding to him. ie: He didn't like me enough, reading between the lines.

 

We got together again a month after that (I initiated contact). Things were adequate for two months, then he didn't return emails for about two weeks. I asked what was up and he replied:

 

"I guess I'm just not that into you. It is a cliche, I know, but if I was "really" interested I would make time. Yet I don't. I think that speaks for itself.

 

I hate being so blunt but I'm too tired to be ...PC or whatever would be a good word there."

 

I wrote three progressively more annoyed emails (the first asking why, saying he seemed to enjoy my company and certainly enjoyed the sex), the other two telling him that his was unduly harsh and he didn't need to be such an ******* to me, I didn't deserve that and I hoped his dates showed him what he was losing in giving me, my kindness, intelligence, sexiness and beauty up.

 

I have not contacted this time. I won't. I know it's the only way to heal from someone who obviously and heart-breakingly does not care one whit about me or my feelings.

 

I'm trying very hard to not think about him and failing. I cry everyday. Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead but then tell myself NO MAN is worth dying for! I am keeping busy with home improvement, reading, going to the beach, dieting, and exercising. I've lost 12 pounds, on purpose, since the breakup. So good things ARE happening but they're overshadowed by the trauma of losing him and in such a heartless way.

 

I sometimes even think I won't find someone again who is as attractive and intelligent. But nicer....and kinder. I am supposedly intelligent, attractive, kind, educated, sometimes rather funny in a quirky way. I remind myself of that, too, but all that wasn't good enough, I feel I was missing something or I am still not good enough somehow. I know that's supposed to be flawed thinking, but it's hard not to think that way.

 

Thanks for reading. Any insight or suggestions would be helpful to make this go away as FAST as humanly possible. I am going to get the Susan Elliot book on breakups today.

[skyisfalling]

im so sorry you are going through this winning. I am also in the same boat as you. Reading your story, your bf has made it very clear that he no longer is interested in you and we both know you deserve better.

 

It sucks, I too, initiated contact 3 months ago after our fight and we got back together. As of now, we're broken up and I'm thinking all this time during our relationship maybe it was me doing all the work.

 

The pain sucks but at least we're in this together! Let's do ourselves a favor and NC those asses out of our lives.. in 1 month hopefully you and I will be feeling a lot better than what we are feeling now.

[Winning]

I hope it's just one more month (or less) for us both. Thanks so much for the response. *hug*

[ladyabstrused]

It has been one and a half months since we broke up for good. We'd broken up once before when he said he wasn't 'bonding' to me after one month of dating, when he saw me bonding to him. ie: He didn't like me enough, reading between the lines.

 

We got together again a month after that (I initiated contact). Things were adequate for two months, then he didn't return emails for about two weeks. I asked what was up and he replied:

 

"I guess I'm just not that into you. It is a cliche, I know, but if I was "really" interested I would make time. Yet I don't. I think that speaks for itself.

 

I hate being so blunt but I'm too tired to be ...PC or whatever would be a good word there."

 

I wrote three progressively more annoyed emails (the first asking why, saying he seemed to enjoy my company and certainly enjoyed the sex), the other two telling him that his was unduly harsh and he didn't need to be such an ******* to me, I didn't deserve that and I hoped his dates showed him what he was losing in giving me, my kindness, intelligence, sexiness and beauty up.

 

I have not contacted this time. I won't. I know it's the only way to heal from someone who obviously and heart-breakingly does not care one whit about me or my feelings.

 

I'm trying very hard to not think about him and failing. I cry everyday. Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead but then tell myself NO MAN is worth dying for! I am keeping busy with home improvement, reading, going to the beach, dieting, and exercising. I've lost 12 pounds, on purpose, since the breakup. So good things ARE happening but they're overshadowed by the trauma of losing him and in such a heartless way.

 

I sometimes even think I won't find someone again who is as attractive and intelligent. But nicer....and kinder. I am supposedly intelligent, attractive, kind, educated, sometimes rather funny in a quirky way. I remind myself of that, too, but all that wasn't good enough, I feel I was missing something or I am still not good enough somehow. I know that's supposed to be flawed thinking, but it's hard not to think that way.

 

Thanks for reading. Any insight or suggestions would be helpful to make this go away as FAST as humanly possible. I am going to get the Susan Elliot book on breakups today.

 

Winning, I'm sorry you had to go through that.. sucks when you really care about the guy and he doesn't really like you as much in return. But a least you are doing well there with your extra time you have now, I'm glad! Good for you. Keep on being positive.

 

As for not able to find someone like that again, well of course not since each individual is different in their own way. But I'm sure there are similar guys out there or even better ones whom you'll meet in the future.

[Winning]

Thank you. I'm still struggling though it's been 7 weeks yesterday.

[ladyabstrused]

Keep going! I'm on my 4th week (with several breaks initially lol).