picaso28 Posted June 8, 2012 Posted June 8, 2012 Hi all, wondering when do people generally feel it is right to add people on facebook.. basically i have a new job, quite keen on a girl but don't really know her as of yet. Still at work ' friends' rather than real friends. Do you think it is too early to add her on facebook....don't wanna appear over keen and weird....ha ha but obviously facebook is always a good way to engage with people you just met
Pyro Posted June 8, 2012 Posted June 8, 2012 I don't add people that I work with, but that is just me. Get to know her more in person before you go to FB. I have a feeling that if you add her now that you will mostly communicate with her through there instead of in person.
Eddie Edirol Posted June 9, 2012 Posted June 9, 2012 If you request her on fb before you even know her, you are communicating two things. 1.) You are too chicken to approach her in person, which makes you look like a wimp, and creepy 2.) You dont know what youre doing with dating, which isnt attractive. You have to talk to her in person first. You have to charm her, and let her ask you for a friend request. You have lunch a couple times, then ask for her number.
Author picaso28 Posted June 10, 2012 Author Posted June 10, 2012 sorry don't think i was clear, i do know her as we work together. We are 'work friends' if you like. But obviously i like her and i thought if i add her on facebook it is a subtle way of letting her know i like her. But i dont want to add her too soon so i was just asking when people think it is right time to add friends.
WonderKid Posted June 10, 2012 Posted June 10, 2012 Adding her on Facebook has its benefits. But hanging out with her and talking more in person has more wonders. Facebook is not for dating. Its not what it used to be. But say if you catch her online and you guys IM eachother, that can work wonders too. Just pay attention to her message pattern. Short three word replies often shows boredom or some lack or interest. Take time to get to know her in person.
Eddie Edirol Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 sorry don't think i was clear, i do know her as we work together. We are 'work friends' if you like. But obviously i like her and i thought if i add her on facebook it is a subtle way of letting her know i like her. But i dont want to add her too soon so i was just asking when people think it is right time to add friends. Put it this way, do NOT add her until youve been out on a few dates already, and you know she likes you. Adding her before she likes you doesnt let her know you like her, it lets her know that you arent man enough to show her you like her in person. So if you want her to NOT like you, then request her.
Author picaso28 Posted June 11, 2012 Author Posted June 11, 2012 no think you are missunderstanding what i am saying.....I'm not adding her to say like ' look i am deeply in love with you'.....I wanted to add her to show i like her as a friend and to get to know her a little more. But what i wanted to know was when people think it is acceptable to add a new work ' friend'? I basically dont want to add her and she thinks its a bit weird and suspects I like her romantically. I normally add lots of friends / people i know randomly to be honest. Thats what everyone does on facebook isnt it???
Almond_Joy Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 The proper time to add someone on fb is up to the individual. Some people only add people they know intimately, and some will friend anyone that accepts their requests. Also depends how much a person shares on their fb. I share a lot of things indicative of my personality on my fb, and even though I add anyone I know I tailor what I share to who I want to share it with. She could add you as restricted and block you from seeing all her posts and profile info while having you on her friends list. If you want to get to know her better, the more effective approach would be to tell her that. You're at work or catch her leaving one day just say "Hey, I'd like us to hang out sometime. I think you're pretty cool and I'd like to hang out with you." If you suspect she'll take it as a romantic interest you can say right off the bat you're not asking her out on a date, you're just interested in establishing a friendship. I can't speak for all women, but that's how my male friends initiated friendships with me. I appreciated the straightforwardness. Good luck.
Emilia Posted June 12, 2012 Posted June 12, 2012 I normally add lots of friends / people i know randomly to be honest. Thats what everyone does on facebook isnt it??? I don't. I only add people I consider friends. The only people I've added at work were ones I liked and they left the company. Some people add any Tom, Dick & Harry, it's completely up to you. Perhaps good to consider how much private stuff you post there.
DuchessKaye Posted June 12, 2012 Posted June 12, 2012 I normally add lots of friends / people i know randomly to be honest. Thats what everyone does on facebook isnt it??? I don't... I only have 65 friends on my facebook friends list. It used to be 64
Eddie Edirol Posted June 12, 2012 Posted June 12, 2012 no think you are missunderstanding what i am saying.....I'm not adding her to say like ' look i am deeply in love with you'.....I wanted to add her to show i like her as a friend and to get to know her a little more. But what i wanted to know was when people think it is acceptable to add a new work ' friend'? I basically dont want to add her and she thinks its a bit weird and suspects I like her romantically. I normally add lots of friends / people i know randomly to be honest. Thats what everyone does on facebook isnt it??? Again, the answer is NOOOOOO. YOu dont want to be friends with her, you are attracted to her, and she will see through your friendship. So you DO NOT add her on facebook before you get to know her. You get to know her in person first, thats it. 1
Mimolicious Posted June 12, 2012 Posted June 12, 2012 First- How old are you? To get to "know" her better through FB is not too mature and displays some sort of insecurities on your part. You already know her in person, why sit on an application and snoop on her stuff. Another thing, you are assuming that she will accept your request. A lot of people don't like co-workers in their "personal" business. I know I dont. Which brings me to my next point. It's not the brightest move to get romantically involved with co-workers. A lot of employers will even get rid of your for such thing. What do you do for work? I mean, if you're a store clerk or have a job that your don't value that is not a career then I guess go ahead... 1
rubberduck Posted June 14, 2012 Posted June 14, 2012 I hatehatehate work people on my facebook! I'm with the majority, get to know her, ask her on a date or for her phone number... don't do facebook!
BeyondtheClouds Posted June 15, 2012 Posted June 15, 2012 I'd add her as a friend. You may learn something about her through FB that will help you decide whether you want to go the distance with her. OTOH, at some point, if I were dating a guy and he would not allow me to be his FB friend, I would assume her was hiding something. Yes, it is imperative to get to know someone in real life....but FB walls, particularly the active ones really can reaveal a lot about a person and my save you time.
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