Minority men

[kaylan]

It all depends on the family. I have more in common with a white family from NYC than I would with a black family from Texas.

[mtber75]

NO. I never said a crooked tooth white dude was up there with a great looking black dude.

 

 

I said that, because of my sexual inexperience with black men, the black men would have to be at least average, in order for me to be sexually attracted to them.

 

That is just the way I am. I am not shallow, I do not go for hot guys ( I am not that great myself). I cannot help that I am not attracted to white guys.

 

SO. Black men have to be at last average for m e to date them; where as a white guy could be ugly, and I would date them (as long as they were nto too hideous for me to have sex with).

 

The only difference, is that the black dude has to be at least average for me to date him, where as I would date an unnattractive white guy. I tend to go for personality, and that makes most guys sexy to me.

 

 

Do you better understand?

 

You have a point. If there are 2 equally average looking guys, one white and the other is not. The white woman will chose the white guy based on her familiarity with the physical attributes of the white guy. That is why if a black/minority guy have a superior personality, job than he may have a change with the white woman because biologically speaking woman tend to go with guys that have superior gene qualities.

 

I'm Asian so I will pursue a white girl if she has some exposure to the Asian culture (like living overseas) or just curious about other groups. This is in addition to the normal courtship ritual. Its not racist, its just human nature.

[Quiet Storm]

As a black man, you just gotta dress and look the part and then make the girls feel comfortable and that you're on the same page with them. When you do that, you can overcome the inherent discomfort that a white woman would have with dating a black man because she feels like there is too much of a difference in culture

This sounds like something a white dude that feels superior to black men would say. I think it is often just the opposite. Many white women that date interracially see white men as more passive, especially in the bedroom. They don't want a black man that "acts white", or else they would just date a white dude. They are often attracted to the confident, take charge attitude and raw sexuality that many black men exude.

 

I can see how a sheltered white woman raised in a racist home may feel uncomfortable around a black man, but most young women in this day and age are not like that. Fortunately, the older generation's racist values are fading away. In my area (Maryland), most white women have been to school with black men, worked with black men, and are friends with black men. It is not a big deal to date interracial. Many do. I have been with my black husband for 21 years. We embrace & even laugh about our cultural differences. Our biracial kids, and their biracial friends, call themselves "the best of both worlds".

 

However, I do understand that many area of the country are not as culturally advanced, and that is a shame.

[InJest]

I'm black/asian, and I feel like I'm more attractive to women of other races for some reason. I've dated several black girls, but I get rejected by them more than anyone else. White and Asian women eat me up. Hispanic women too.

[wheream_i]

Brown guy here! *Jumps up & down*

 

Just a little about myself: I'm a Hispanic male from TX, now residing in Nashville, TN. GL, nice teeth, career-oriented working musician. Also a licensed insurance agent for back up. I'm outgoing, friendly, not very tall and I don't speak Spanish, never been in a gang and I've never worked in landscaping. Although, I did mow a few lawns and work construction in my early teens for extra cash.

 

With all that said, every woman I've ever dated (with the exception of two) have been white. I sought them out as often as I have been sought out by them. I have been told by some of these women that they don't like white guys or are tired of white guys. Some have dated me just for the novelty or only because I was a musician. I had a long term gf who was white and 4" taller than me and is in law school. I say this to let you know I don't scrape the bottom of the barrel just so long as I date a white woman.

 

OP, you asked what are the odds a white woman would give a brown guy a chance given my ethnicity? Damn, how racist is that? As if minorities are constantly just hounding white women, as if y'all are just some f*cking prize. What is this, the 1920's? Look out for those savage darkies!

 

I'm not angry, I'm actually giggling at that.

 

Anyways, I've lived with a few white women, been engaged to one. I'll tell you, I never lived with messier people. The last woman I was with long term was Hispanic. Very light skinned, college educated, very well read and highly sought after by white men. She's not attracted to white men.

 

So what was the question again?

[wheream_i]

Allow me to rephrase something. In my original post, I said I went after white women as much as they went after me. I didn't seek someone out because she was white, I sought her out because she was attractive. However, I have been told by more than one girl that she was attracted to me because I wasn't white.

[wheream_i]

Actually reading this further, the original post is pretty f*cking racist. Even more so than Leigh87 came off. It's almost like, how f*cking dare you? Can't believe I even gave it a thought to reply. And I am totally not the kind to pull any kind of race card. I guess I only responded because I am Hispanic and thought my opinion would say something different.

[JuneJulySeptember]

Brown guy here! *Jumps up & down*

 

Just a little about myself: I'm a Hispanic male from TX, now residing in Nashville, TN. GL, nice teeth, career-oriented working musician. Also a licensed insurance agent for back up. I'm outgoing, friendly, not very tall and I don't speak Spanish, never been in a gang and I've never worked in landscaping. Although, I did mow a few lawns and work construction in my early teens for extra cash.

 

With all that said, every woman I've ever dated (with the exception of two) have been white. I sought them out as often as I have been sought out by them. I have been told by some of these women that they don't like white guys or are tired of white guys. Some have dated me just for the novelty or only because I was a musician. I had a long term gf who was white and 4" taller than me and is in law school. I say this to let you know I don't scrape the bottom of the barrel just so long as I date a white woman.

 

OP, you asked what are the odds a white woman would give a brown guy a chance given my ethnicity? Damn, how racist is that? As if minorities are constantly just hounding white women, as if y'all are just some f*cking prize. What is this, the 1920's? Look out for those savage darkies!

 

I'm not angry, I'm actually giggling at that.

 

Anyways, I've lived with a few white women, been engaged to one. I'll tell you, I never lived with messier people. The last woman I was with long term was Hispanic. Very light skinned, college educated, very well read and highly sought after by white men. She's not attracted to white men.

 

So what was the question again?

 

Actually reading this further, the original post is pretty f*cking racist. Even more so than Leigh87 came off. It's almost like, how f*cking dare you? Can't believe I even gave it a thought to reply. And I am totally not the kind to pull any kind of race card. I guess I only responded because I am Hispanic and thought my opinion would say something different.

 

Not sure what set you off.

 

There are white women who won't date minorities. It's how it is. You disagree? Fine. But don't call me a racist for pointing out life's obvious points. If you like, I have tons of examples.

 

Also, I didn't say white women were a prize. That's how you interpreted it. They are actually not my preference. It's a purely hypothetical question. I could have easily have said how many Latina women would date Asian guys or something.

Edited June 1, 2012 by JuneJulySeptember

[wheream_i]

Not sure what set you off.

 

There are white women who won't date minorities. It's how it is. You disagree? Fine. But don't call me a racist for pointing out life's obvious points. If you like, I have tons of examples.

 

I apologize. I came off angrier than I really am. Just called it the way I saw it. What if I had said "I am disgusted by white women. They don't do it for me because they will never be as good as a Hispanic woman"? Answer that honestly because you're essentially saying the same thing, that minority men must have to jump through hoops and be better than a typical white guy just to get a prized white woman in our grips.

[wheream_i]

pointing out life's obvious points.

 

Lol, omg.

 

BTW, what is your nationality? I figured you were a caucasian female which is why I'm probably interpreting the way I am.

[CarrieT]

If you're a black dude, you pretty much have a chance at every Black women. I know there's rare ones that don't like Black men, but still, you assume you are in the running every time you are talking to a black gal. So, it's the rest of your goods that are going to decide.

 

I am a 48-year old white woman and one of my oldest friends is a 48-year old black man. We have been friends since we were 12...

 

He is a bit of a player and has ONLY ever dated white women. And being a player, he has had hundreds of women. He called me last night to talk over the THREE women he had last weekend.

[JuneJulySeptember]

I apologize. I came off angrier than I really am. Just called it the way I saw it. What if I had said "I am disgusted by white women. They don't do it for me because they will never be as good as a Hispanic woman"? Answer that honestly because you're essentially saying the same thing, that minority men must have to jump through hoops and be better than a typical white guy just to get a prized white woman in our grips.

 

I didn't say that. Someone else in the thread did. I think there's white women who won't date black or asian or indian guys no matter what they have going on. I mean, that's how it is.

 

For others, they are just not attracted to black and asian and indian guys in general. If a really good looking one came along, then maybe. But black and asian guys tend to have certain features certain women do not find attractive. It's a little different for Hispanic guys because some of them look straight white.

 

On the other hand, some white women are attracted to a decent amount of black and asian guys. And a minority of white women prefer black guys and even asian guys.

 

So, what I'm saying is if you are the typical looking average black guy or asian guy, maybe your chances that white woman would date you are 50/50. Just my opinion.

[JuneJulySeptember]

Lol, omg.

 

BTW, what is your nationality? I figured you were a caucasian female which is why I'm probably interpreting the way I am.

 

I'm an Asian dude. It's a pretty obvious point to me. There are a good amount of white women who won't date minorities period and even more who are not 'really attracted' to minorities.

[JuneJulySeptember]

I am a 48-year old white woman and one of my oldest friends is a 48-year old black man. We have been friends since we were 12...

 

He is a bit of a player and has ONLY ever dated white women. And being a player, he has had hundreds of women. He called me last night to talk over the THREE women he had last weekend.

 

That is impressive.

[Quiet Storm]

But black and asian guys tend to have certain features certain women do not find attractive.

 

Lol.

 

If these types of white men (ones that feel superior or better looking than black men) knew how many white women have hooked up with black men on the down low, they'd be flabbergasted. Since I have been with a black man for decades, I have come across many attractive white women that have chosen to share with me that they have been with black men and "wish they had the guts to marry one". Many are afraid to tell their white husbands or boyfriends about the black men in their past because they will be judged for it.

 

We have even had male posters here that don't care about the multiple white guys their girl had sex with before them, but are seriously bothered by the one black guy.

 

Some white men have a really hard time understanding that attractive, hot white women (not just fat trashy ones, as is the common stereotype) can be GENUINELY physically and sexually attracted to black men. This includes their facial features. Black men do not have to act or dress "white" (and I hate saying that because their are so many cultural variations of "white") to attract white women. They attract many just by being themselves, which is a very attractive quality.

[RiverRunning]

I'm a white woman and I can tell you right now that I have a HUGE crush on this 300-poundish black guy who works at the store where I shop. He's such a cutie! He'd definitely have a chance, although I suspect he's a little too young for me. Two other hot black guys? Tim Russ as 'Tuvok' in ST: Voyager ( :) ) and Barack Obama, of course. Wooo!

 

I had a crush on a Hispanic friend back in high school. He had the prettiest eyes. Gay, though. Drat.

 

I have a big thing for Asian guys. Specifically, Koreans (I can usually tell the difference), but I like Asian guys in general too. It's my thing, I guess.

 

I do feel bad though because I know many people tend to only associate within their own racial group. Sadly, there's often a reason for that - family members may not approve (although this is changing) and that can cause a lot of problems for any fledgling relationship.

 

My ex's grandparents could be fairly racist. I have no idea what they would have done if I had been black.

 

Rest assured, men of color: there's someone out there for you. But I would say don't limit yourself to any one group. I do hope you encounter others who are open-minded...and attracted to you.

[TaurusTerp]

I have noticed in my humble experience whites tend to sublimely put in their racism in the conversation and it really never ceases to take me by surprise. I would say every other ethnicity besides black and latinos are passive aggressive. I'm not passive aggressive at all, but Asian and whites top the list for it. I don't know why white people are so smart with physics and astronomy and then be really dumb about race and racism.

 

What a hypocrite. Let me sum up your post:

 

Whites are so racist, it amazes me.

 

White people and asians are so passive aggressive, unlike blacks and latinos.

 

**** outta here

 

PS that's not what sublimely means, but at least you're really smart about race and racism unlike white people

[kaylan]

Not sure what set you off.

 

There are white women who won't date minorities. It's how it is. You disagree? Fine. But don't call me a racist for pointing out life's obvious points. If you like, I have tons of examples.

 

Also, I didn't say white women were a prize. That's how you interpreted it. They are actually not my preference. It's a purely hypothetical question. I could have easily have said how many Latina women would date Asian guys or something.

But why did you make another typical thread which puts white women on a pedestal and basically puts non white men beneath them in some rat race to attain them? Your OP comes off as if they are some super prize and that non whites dont have much chance with them.

 

I think that was wheream_i''s point

I'm an Asian dude. It's a pretty obvious point to me. There are a good amount of white women who won't date minorities period and even more who are not 'really attracted' to minorities.

Not suprised. Asian and Indian posters seem to bring this up the most on this site. And I cant blame them with how the media treats Asian and Indian males. At least Indian women are far more loyal to their men and culture than Asian women. I can see why you thought up this topic.

What a hypocrite. Let me sum up your post:

 

Whites are so racist, it amazes me.

 

White people and asians are so passive aggressive, unlike blacks and latinos.

 

**** outta here

 

PS that's not what sublimely means, but at least you're really smart about race and racism unlike white people

You missed the entire point of her post. She mad two valid points:

 

a) Black and Latino men on average tend to be a lot more assertive, masculine, and confident than White, Asian, or Indian men. Plenty of women attest to this fact. Again this is on average though. This isnt to say that there arent plenty of wimpy Latino and Black men...because there are. Just like theres plenty of overtly masculine and confidently assertive White and Asian men. Its just that on average, people can see Black men and Latino men tend to be more confident.

 

b) Whites as a group tend to not recognize or have the same understanding of racism as other races do. Also, many whites tend to dismiss it when a minority calls out racism. This is so because minorities have a different life experience and perspective...so it would be hard for the average white person to see where they are coming from. Especially when living in a society built mainly around white culture.

 

And her last sentence was saying, "Why are whites so understanding of the natural sciences but not generally adept when it comes to the social sciences"

 

PS - I think you knew she meant to say subliminally and not sublimely.

Edited June 1, 2012 by kaylan

[LittlePrince]

I am a 48-year old white woman and one of my oldest friends is a 48-year old black man. We have been friends since we were 12...

 

He is a bit of a player and has ONLY ever dated white women. And being a player, he has had hundreds of women. He called me last night to talk over the THREE women he had last weekend.

That's a friend?

[ATrainofAngels]

Lol.

 

If these types of white men (ones that feel superior or better looking than black men) knew how many white women have hooked up with black men on the down low, they'd be flabbergasted. Since I have been with a black man for decades, I have come across many attractive white women that have chosen to share with me that they have been with black men and "wish they had the guts to marry one". Many are afraid to tell their white husbands or boyfriends about the black men in their past because they will be judged for it.

 

We have even had male posters here that don't care about the multiple white guys their girl had sex with before them, but are seriously bothered by the one black guy.

 

Some white men have a really hard time understanding that attractive, hot white women (not just fat trashy ones, as is the common stereotype) can be GENUINELY physically and sexually attracted to black men. This includes their facial features. Black men do not have to act or dress "white" (and I hate saying that because their are so many cultural variations of "white") to attract white women. They attract many just by being themselves, which is a very attractive quality.

 

 

 

 

I don't think I'm superior to black men, the reality of the situation is that a black woman would probably pick an equally attractive black man over me any day of the week. It's the same thing the other way around

 

 

Most people want to date within their own race. You know that term opposites attract? It's complete nonsense. Most people want somebody as close and similar to them as possible because that's what they feel comfortable with

 

 

That doesn't mean that you can't get white girls as a black man, it just means that you might have to work a little harder and deal with a little more rejection. That's just how life is

[mesmerized]

Why are white women such a prize to most men anyway? I mean I understand that sometimes we like someone who looks different but why does it have to always be about white women (or men for that matter)? I'm sure part of it is how these women look but the biggest reason for it is the social status these men think they will have by having a white woman on their side. It's kinda pathetic.

[kaylan]

^Answer: Eurocentric media has a lot to do with it. People grow up seeing mostly white people in billboards, tv shows, movies, commercials, etc. Thatll have a huge affect on whom you are attracted to. Status is part of it as well...but Id definitely say media is the biggest factor.

 

Media can change a lot. I remember a big part of the Asian woman boom, being when Lucy Liu got big in the states. Ally Mcbeal tv show, some movie roles and such. And several times Ive been told by girls that Will Smith started their crush on black men.

 

The easiest way to make a certain group of people a hot commodity is to make them big in the media. Jeremy Lin blew up in the NBA this past spring...and if the media decided to start pushing Asian males as sexy, youd best believe many girls growing up now would catch onto to that and run with it. If you started making teenage dramas and adult romance movies have interracial couples with an Asian male or an Indian female...youd see a shift in tastes with the younger generation.

 

The thing is a lot of young men and women grew up watching Friends, Dawsons Creek, 90210, etc...and it wasnt just white people watching these shows. So it influences how you see dating. Most dramas had all white casts...and the few tv shows or moves with different races of people tended to be comedies that didnt focus much on dating. So girls grow up thinking about Matthew Perry and Joshua Jackson....while guys think about Neve Campbell and Katie Holmes.

Edited June 1, 2012 by kaylan

[mesmerized]

^Answer: Eurocentric media has a lot to do with it. People grow up seeing mostly white people in billboards, tv shows, movies, commercials, etc. Thatll have a huge affect on whom you are attracted to. Status is part of it as well...but Id definitely say media is the biggest factor.

 

Media can change a lot. I remember a big part of the Asian woman boom, being when Lucy Liu got big in the states. Ally Mcbeal tv show, some movie roles and such. And several times Ive been told by girls that Will Smith started their crush on black men.

 

The easiest way to make a certain group of people a hot commodity is to make them big in the media. Jeremy Lin blew up in the NBA this past spring...and if the media decided to start pushing Asian males as sexy, youd best believe many girls growing up now would catch onto to that and run with it. If you started making teenage dramas and adult romance movies have interracial couples with an Asian male or an Indian female...youd see a shift in tastes with the younger generation.

 

The thing is a lot of young men and women grew up watching Friends, Dawsons Creek, 90210, etc...and it wasnt just white people watching these shows. So it influences how you see dating. Most dramas had all white casts...and the few tv shows or moves with different races of people tended to be comedies that didnt focus much on dating. So girls grow up thinking about Matthew Perry and Joshua Jackson....while guys think about Neve Campbell and Katie Holmes.

 

I agree with you. But I feel like people can and do often look past what media tells them to find attractive. But they still feel the need to go for the media ideals to save or gain "status".

[LittlePrince]

It's kinda pathetic.

No, it is pathetic. They are focused on what isn't important and will never find anything significant.

[LittlePrince]

^Answer: Eurocentric media has a lot to do with it. People grow up seeing mostly white people in billboards, tv shows, movies, commercials, etc. Thatll have a huge affect on whom you are attracted to. Status is part of it as well...but Id definitely say media is the biggest factor.

 

Media can change a lot. I remember a big part of the Asian woman boom, being when Lucy Liu got big in the states. Ally Mcbeal tv show, some movie roles and such. And several times Ive been told by girls that Will Smith started their crush on black men.

 

The easiest way to make a certain group of people a hot commodity is to make them big in the media. Jeremy Lin blew up in the NBA this past spring...and if the media decided to start pushing Asian males as sexy, youd best believe many girls growing up now would catch onto to that and run with it. If you started making teenage dramas and adult romance movies have interracial couples with an Asian male or an Indian female...youd see a shift in tastes with the younger generation.

 

The thing is a lot of young men and women grew up watching Friends, Dawsons Creek, 90210, etc...and it wasnt just white people watching these shows. So it influences how you see dating. Most dramas had all white casts...and the few tv shows or moves with different races of people tended to be comedies that didnt focus much on dating. So girls grow up thinking about Matthew Perry and Joshua Jackson....while guys think about Neve Campbell and Katie Holmes.

The media influences and controls what people find attractive as much as their own body image and the weirdo steps they take to compensate for any flaws which is not at all.