Am I stingy like he saysss?

[BeyondtheClouds]

Get rid of his sorry ass. But then, you will find that when he gets a new gf, he will be digging deep into his pockets for her. why? because she told him he needs to do that.

 

Even with my current bf, he tried that, "but I thought women liked contributing to dating costs" or some such. then I found receipts and credit card statements related to going out with someone else and to add insult to injury, he called her "just a friend." I said, in that case, I want to be just a friend as well. Things changed very quickly after that.

 

You are crazy to

1. pay even 50/50 for going out with this guy

2. put up with his selfish remarks

3. let him stay at your place while he avoids paying rent /mortgage wherever he stays.

[SerCay]

Get rid of his sorry ass. But then, you will find that when he gets a new gf, he will be digging deep into his pockets for her. why? because she told him he needs to do that.

 

Even with my current bf, he tried that, "but I thought women liked contributing to dating costs" or some such. then I found receipts and credit card statements related to going out with someone else and to add insult to injury, he called her "just a friend." I said, in that case, I want to be just a friend as well. Things changed very quickly after that.

 

You are crazy to

1. pay even 50/50 for going out with this guy

2. put up with his selfish remarks

3. let him stay at your place while he avoids paying rent /mortgage wherever he stays.

 

 

It's true I never told him he needs to do that.. I don't know it's really not in my nature to ask for things and I always believe that I'm independent and i can pay for my own things.. however when things get serious I do expect things back, it's called reciprocity right

 

It's just him not knowing how it's like to be living in his own house and paying for everything himself.. I noticed now

 

I also noticed how he's always keen to help out people that portray themselves like poor and helpless, I'm just not a person like that

 

It's a pity though because in all other aspects we were very well together and our love was solid..except for some issues:love:

 

I would like to know if any of you had experiences too with someone like this?

[TheFinalWord]

You also wouldn't have considered her living in your p[lace if she would pay half your rent and other utility costs? I would be fine with that actually but it looks like he wants to be living in a castle otherwise won't move from his bedroom @ his parents'

 

Anyway it's true I guess.. he doesn't know bits about how it is and thinks it's nice to stay at my hotel. We have been having other issues too so I did call it quits. I want to be with someone who is able to take responsibility ater all.. for anything.

 

Personally, no, not straight away. Not if I'm going to marry a girl b/c I have seen too many marriages destroyed b/c one (or both) does not know the value of a dollar.

 

I am just of a mindset that everyone should have to pay their own bills for a while to see what it is like before getting married. Even in your situation, I think you are mature, but if I was with you I would request that you live on your own for a while once you are done with school and have a job. That way you can get an idea of what it is like to have to pay your own bills and juggle a job. Even that is different than living on your own while in college b/c you can always fall back on student loans. In daily life, that isn't an option. You have a certain salary and you have to budget or you don't eat. Even 6 months of living like that can really change a person's perspective. For example, "I pay for the dates", yeah his idea of a date might change if he only has $20 to spare after paying bills and working 60 hours a week lol

 

It's one of those things that if the person has always had a safety net (parents, girlfriend) they will never get it. Let him go a few weeks where the option is eating or going out on expensive dates. I guarantee the next week having PB&J sandwiches for a picnic will look like a good date

[SerCay]

Personally, no, not straight away. Not if I'm going to marry a girl b/c I have seen too many marriages destroyed b/c one (or both) does not know the value of a dollar.

 

I am just of a mindset that everyone should have to pay their own bills for a while to see what it is like before getting married. Even in your situation, I think you are mature, but if I was with you I would request that you live on your own for a while once you are done with school and have a job. That way you can get an idea of what it is like to have to pay your own bills and juggle a job. Even that is different than living on your own while in college b/c you can always fall back on student loans. In daily life, that isn't an option. You have a certain salary and you have to budget or you don't eat. Even 6 months of living like that can really change a person's perspective. For example, "I pay for the dates", yeah his idea of a date might change if he only has $20 to spare after paying bills and working 60 hours a week lol

 

It's one of those things that if the person has always had a safety net (parents, girlfriend) they will never get it. Let him go a few weeks where the option is eating or going out on expensive dates. I guarantee the next week having PB&J sandwiches for a picnic will look like a good date

 

Which I absolutely won't mind lol.. Having fun is having a date right? doesn't have to be expensive

[Emilia]

I think the lesson in this is never to date a guy who still lives at home with his parents. Clearly his priority is himself and what he can get out of everyone instead of standing on his own two feet.

[SerCay]

Yes definitely true.. by now we broke up and he's blaming everything on me, telling me how bad I treated him.

 

Even though I feel hurt a lot and I miss him, I think it's for the best.. He's a person that can only put effort in a relationship when everything's going perfect..but no relationship is EVER perfect

 

Thanks guys!