Almond_Joy Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 (edited) Do girls purposely start behaving in a gross way when they are unhappy in a relationship and/or romantic daliance in order to push guys away? I'm wondering about this because, even as a guy, I would never do this. No matter what, I always like to be clean and smell good for my girl, and even if we were going to break up I would still want her to remember me that way. However, in a couple of cases I have had girls become smelly, and engage in gross behavior, when the relationship wasn't going well. Here are my examples: In one instance, I had a summer fling with a girl that eventually started to cool off. At that point, she started picking her toenails in front of me, and started leaving her hair unkempt and slightly smelly when we hang out, etc. In another instance, I was dating this girl for about a year, and we were boyfriend and girlfriend and the relationship was going great for most of that time. Towards the end of the year, we started having problems... As we both started discussing what we would like differently in the relationship, and struggling to find common ground, she started letting herself go. For example, she would stop showering before I come over, even after she'd gone to the gym and gotten all sticky. She would also start farting in bed when we are together and thinking nothing of it. Her room would smell bad when I would come over, sometimes of farts and some other times of other stuff that I can't really place. And so on. Needless to say, in both cases this behavior made it much harder for me to salvage the relationship, or want to. So, girls, how would you interpret/explain this behavior? I think it depends on the girl what this means. Meaning if the girl looks unkempt in front of family and friends, not just you, it may be that she's comfortable with a lower hygenic/grooming standard than your own. If she lives by that lower standard with you, then she may be under the understanding that you accept her and the standards she sets for herself. If you honestly think lesser of people who have a lower hygienic standard than you, or see it as a strong indicator that they are not into you anymore, it might be helpful for you to mention how important hygiene is to you early in the dating period. That way the woman has a clear understanding of how you look at hygiene and grooming. if she doesn't ascribe to your philosophy, you can acknowledge this incompatibility early on and save a lot of quess work. Edited May 31, 2012 by Almond_Joy
dasein Posted May 31, 2012 Posted May 31, 2012 I get what the OP is saying. She took a lot of care in grooming and cleanliness, then suddenly changed her regular behavior. Agree, no idea why OP is being so misinterpreted. It's not extremely common, but I've had it happen to me too. Girl has one standard of dress for the first few months, then suddenly it's sweatpants and granny panties all the time. When that happens, yes, OP, time to move on, as there is either another guy in the picture or she is simply not as interested as she once was. Not talking about mere settling in and getting comfortable behavior, but more. It can be misinterpreted though, I had a GF who would come to bed with thick lotion on her face and neck. I started to become annoyed about it, but decided to ask her about it instead. She said that people at work noticed "sex type marks" on her face and neck (she had beautiful, but delicate skin) and she didn't want the ribbing at work. So, OP, ask her if she realizes she's doing it. If she cleans up, she didn't realize it, if she persists, she probably wants done with you.
Onlyjonley Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 I fart around my bf ...but still love him very much.
spiderowl Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 In a real relationship, no-one is going to be perfect all the time. That's just the way things are. Sometimes they are going to be ill and too ill to wash or take care of themselves. That's life. It's not wonderful, but it's something we all cope with. It is also true that if someone doesn't want to continue in a relationship, they will feel little need to impress their partner. People do get more relaxed with people they know well and are more likely to do things they might avoid with a brand new partner in the honeymoon period, but generally, if you stop taking care of yourself it's because you are unhappy. Maybe this what happened.
FitChick Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 I had a GF who would come to bed with thick lotion on her face and neck. Did she look like this?
SpiralOut Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 It is also true that if someone doesn't want to continue in a relationship, they will feel little need to impress their partner. People do get more relaxed with people they know well and are more likely to do things they might avoid with a brand new partner in the honeymoon period, but generally, if you stop taking care of yourself it's because you are unhappy. Maybe this what happened. That's exactly what I was thinking. Whenever I let myself go in a relationship it's because I feel like he doesn't appreciate my efforts anyway, so why bother?
Woggle Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 This reminds me of the time a woman asked me to look at the load she just dropped in the toilet but she was very much interested in me. How did I keep finding these people?
dasein Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 Did she look like this? LOL, similar but white instead of green.
Leigh 87 Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 I do not fart on purpose around my boyfriend, but when I do accidently, it tends to smell really bad, and he will be like : ****, Leighhh !@&^*!!!! But he does it in a joking sort of way! Then, he gets right up and farts in my face. To " join in". Only his farts are loud and do not smell, thankfully. The opposite of mine! HAHA!!!!!!!!!! I am immature, guys complaining about girls farting makes me LAUGH hehe. Funny subject to talk about, is all:) Imagine a guy dumping his long term girlfriend for FARTING. Sorry, but LOL. I am waiting for a thread about that now! 1
samsungxoxo Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 I'm different when I'm not expecting any visitors vs if a bf or family member were to come often. Right now I didn't take a shower because there is no need to. I'm not going anywhere and my hair can wait till Saturday. But yeah it's nasty doing your regular habits in front of a bf (those girls the OP is describing are plain nasty). Alone.... sure.. sometimes I fart all night long but with someone else in my room, nope I would be beyond embarrassed acting that way.
wordrock Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 (edited) Imagine a guy dumping his long term girlfriend for FARTING. Sorry, but LOL. I am waiting for a thread about that now! :lmao: That is too funny. Here is an article OP should read: Do You Fart in Front of Your Boyfriend? Edited June 1, 2012 by wordrock
Leopard Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 The girls just don't care to be good anymore. There is no point in trying to hold in a burp, or to be extra clean, if you don't care what the guy thinks anymore. I guess yeah, she doesn't care if you hate it or not, she doesn't feel like going the extra mile to be pretty/clean. I haven't done it to that extreme, but yeah I stop doing certain things because I don't have to impress him anymore (like always have my nails done or always wear the best clothes).
Author boytoy Posted June 1, 2012 Author Posted June 1, 2012 Thanks for all the responses all. I think some of the responses confirmed my suspicion that in these two cases, the sudden drop in hygiene and change in behavior were symptomatic of a deeper problem with the relationship. In other words, they both indicated that I lost the girl's devotion, and the relationship was on the way down. In both cases that's what ended up happening soon afterwards. Another thing some of the responses conveyed to me was that this is not too uncommon; when a girl loses interest she puts in less effort. Its something I plan to watch for in my future relationship as a sign to move on.
wordrock Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 Thanks for all the responses all. I think some of the responses confirmed my suspicion that in these two cases, the sudden drop in hygiene and change in behavior were symptomatic of a deeper problem with the relationship. In other words, they both indicated that I lost the girl's devotion, and the relationship was on the way down. In both cases that's what ended up happening soon afterwards. Another thing some of the responses conveyed to me was that this is not too uncommon; when a girl loses interest she puts in less effort. Its something I plan to watch for in my future relationship as a sign to move on. While I do think you're putting too much thought into it, I can agree that is what happens sometimes. Some women also do the exact opposite in public when they lose interest in you... they start trying to look as attractive as possible. However, even though those relationships didn't work out, you should also consider the possibility that they were just getting comfortable with you.
GG3 Posted June 1, 2012 Posted June 1, 2012 Thanks for all the responses all. I think some of the responses confirmed my suspicion that in these two cases, the sudden drop in hygiene and change in behavior were symptomatic of a deeper problem with the relationship. In other words, they both indicated that I lost the girl's devotion, and the relationship was on the way down. In both cases that's what ended up happening soon afterwards. Another thing some of the responses conveyed to me was that this is not too uncommon; when a girl loses interest she puts in less effort. Its something I plan to watch for in my future relationship as a sign to move on. My two cents...I'm thinking more that the girl became comfortable with you. Everyone starts dropping their guard and becoming comfortable and doing certain things. It's just that those particular girls did those particular things...and apparently you don't want a girl who farts around you.
Recommended Posts