marilla Posted May 23, 2012 Posted May 23, 2012 I was hanging out with this man casually. However he really hurt me a few times, and i mean i was really deeply hurt and shocked. Now i think he wants us to start all over again but i am so so scared! What would you do? Cut him loose? Hang out casually? Be friends? I don't know what he wants exactly and i am afraid to try again. However i do have some doubts that if i don't try i may regret it afterwards as he is not a bad guy but he has managed to put me through a lot of emotional pain. What do you think? thank you!
Yookie Posted May 23, 2012 Posted May 23, 2012 Find someone who will treat you right unless you enjoy the abuse.
Freddys Posted May 23, 2012 Posted May 23, 2012 I was hanging out with this man casually. However he really hurt me a few times, and i mean i was really deeply hurt and shocked. Now i think he wants us to start all over again but i am so so scared! What would you do? Cut him loose? Hang out casually? Be friends? I don't know what he wants exactly and i am afraid to try again. However i do have some doubts that if i don't try i may regret it afterwards as he is not a bad guy but he has managed to put me through a lot of emotional pain. What do you think? thank you! Could you please be more specific? How did he hurt you? Physically? Emotionally? Is he a player? Were you "just" dating or you were into a relationship, sex involved.
Author marilla Posted May 23, 2012 Author Posted May 23, 2012 No it wasn't physical hurting. We were hanging out casually but he cut me loose three times to be with another woman-the same woman. After he would come back to me and try hard to be with me again. For some reason i always blame it on me eg that i was not very decided and i always fall in the same trap of going back. However all times this happened he was rude, ignoring me,distant etc and that hurt a lot.
wordrock Posted May 23, 2012 Posted May 23, 2012 No it wasn't physical hurting. We were hanging out casually but he cut me loose three times to be with another woman-the same woman. Without knowing why he is spending time with this other woman, all I can say is that it appears he doesn't really care for you that much. You are a fall back for him. Forget about him and try to find someone who wants to spend time with you and doesn't do this. As a guy, if a woman no shows or cancels on me without rescheduling, I give her one more chance. I usually try to let her set something up. If she doesn't, or doesn't call me back later, I move on. Don't get your heart set on someone you've just met. No matter how nice or into you they seem at first, sometimes people will just do a 180 and walk away. Or, sometimes your desire to be with that person will blind you to clues that they don't feel the same way.
Author marilla Posted May 24, 2012 Author Posted May 24, 2012 I haven't known him for a short time. I have known him for a year and this same thing happened 3 times during that year. It was like some kind of pattern-he makes the effort-i give in-she hits-he runs being insensitive-i get hurt and tell him that-he comes back. This happened 3 times. Does anyone make sense out of this? The first 2 times i said it was my fault since i was not very decided on him. The 3rd time he said that it took me too long to give in-but i was so hurt to trust him again. It is like he always has some excuse and i keep falling back in this. I am so scared you guys.
veggirl Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 No it wasn't physical hurting. We were hanging out casually but he cut me loose three times to be with another woman-the same woman. After he would come back to me and try hard to be with me again. For some reason i always blame it on me eg that i was not very decided and i always fall in the same trap of going back. However all times this happened he was rude, ignoring me,distant etc and that hurt a lot. Oh hell no. Run away from this jerk. So, basically he is on an off period with the woman HE ACTUALLY WANTS, so he is settling for you. Again. But when she decides she wants him again, he will go to her and leave you AGAIN. Girl!! 3 times this has happened?? Wake up!
mtber75 Posted May 24, 2012 Posted May 24, 2012 Yeah I agree with the others...You got to move on. This guy treats you like a back up and you deserve better, friend or otherwise!
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