mtcrsx28 Posted May 21, 2012 Posted May 21, 2012 Lately i have the intense thought/feeling that i NEED to break up with my girlfriend but when i sit down and try and honestly think i cant come up with what the root cause of this feeling is? This is my second serious relationship, is feeling like this normal when its time to break up or when a relationship has run its course? In my head i don't want to, it feels like i would be throwing away something good for no reason at all. i have talked to my family and friends about this and no one can really relate not even my identical twin brother. She is a nice, pretty girl who i have fun with( when im not getting this feeling). am i just confused i spend everyday with her even sleepover at her place almost every night. Has anyone felt like this before what did you do?
Dark Phoenix Posted May 21, 2012 Posted May 21, 2012 you do what needs to be done, dont drag her in the mud with you just end it gracefully
Author mtcrsx28 Posted May 21, 2012 Author Posted May 21, 2012 ok, i have decided that im going to not see her as much for a week or so and see what happens n if nothing improves than im going to end it..its really sad though since i do really love her and care about her, so is this a common way to feel the thing is all i want is to be with her but i feel like there is a mental block in my head, am i crazy or is this normal?
d'Arthez Posted May 21, 2012 Posted May 21, 2012 Spark gone in the relationship? Are you not really sure what you want in the future, with her? Try a bit of introspection, and see if you can find what is missing, or what you fear if you give up this relationship. Maybe that will help you to make sense of your feelings.
DuchessKaye Posted May 21, 2012 Posted May 21, 2012 (edited) You're hot and cold! Calm down and don't make rush decisions. Edited May 21, 2012 by DuchessKaye
Author mtcrsx28 Posted May 21, 2012 Author Posted May 21, 2012 Spark gone in the relationship? Are you not really sure what you want in the future, with her? Try a bit of introspection, and see if you can find what is missing, or what you fear if you give up this relationship. Maybe that will help you to make sense of your feelings. yeah the "spark is gone" if you will. the only thing that i can think of that led me to feeling this way is that were in constant contact..... it seems when i take a breather from her for a couple hours and go take my mind of things with friends or work i feel a bit better when i go back to her. i cant help but feel guilty for feeling this way however i have spoken to her about it and she has agreed to try and make things work with me. i find myself looking at other girls no crushes or anything but i feel this yearning for the "new and exciting" but im not this type of guy at all who wants to have random hookups and date tons of girls i want a serious relationship ( not marriage or anything im only 20) but something stable.
d'Arthez Posted May 21, 2012 Posted May 21, 2012 This is not something that is solved by breaking up with each other. You will run into the same issue with other girls. The problem may simply be that you make each other your whole lives'. Do some things on your own, let her do some things on her own. Spend time on your own interests, with your own friends without her around and the same applies to her. Your relationship may also be too much of a routine. Doing the exact same things over and over again does get boring. Try doing the occasional new thing together, or something like the occasional daytrip to say a zoo or something like that. You'll keep on discovering each other through doing different things.
immitable Posted May 21, 2012 Posted May 21, 2012 It seems routine has kicked in, you seem not to be a good leader in the relationship and women want someone to lead them. You need to change. Try taking her to movies, doing something interesting with her, trying new things in bed. You need to bring a breath of fresh air, it is obvious she loves you, othervise she would have broken up with you by now and blamed you for letting relationship get stale. Try at the same time to maintain your integrity and friends and your hobbies. It seems that you are looking for a woman to define you.
Author mtcrsx28 Posted May 21, 2012 Author Posted May 21, 2012 ok thank you for the advice im going to give it a try:)
Author mtcrsx28 Posted May 21, 2012 Author Posted May 21, 2012 It seems routine has kicked in, you seem not to be a good leader in the relationship and women want someone to lead them. You need to change. Try taking her to movies, doing something interesting with her, trying new things in bed. You need to bring a breath of fresh air, it is obvious she loves you, othervise she would have broken up with you by now and blamed you for letting relationship get stale. Try at the same time to maintain your integrity and friends and your hobbies. It seems that you are looking for a woman to define you. yeah your probably right, i find it hard to say no to her when she asks to do things i dont want to such as go out to eat etc things we do all the time. i have felt like i need to take control for awhile just havent done it yet.
flitzanu Posted May 21, 2012 Posted May 21, 2012 only your second relationship you say...are you trying to force or convince yourself you like this person but you don't really "feel it"? it's perfectly acceptable to see how things go, and if they don't feel right, you can end it. you don't have to fit 100% with every person you try to date.
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