96nole Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I'm new here. My W is cheating on me and I've thrown her out. She's now living with the OM, who lives with his mother. I would love to hear some stories of affairs ending bad for the cheater and the OM or OW. I don't know if it will with my STBexW. But a few stories of bad affairs may make me feel better.
Bryanp Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 You did the right thing. You now need to do the following: 1. get tested for STD's 2. expose this affair to everyone 3. get a good lawyer to understanding your options.
Author 96nole Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 You did the right thing. You now need to do the following: 1. get tested for STD's 2. expose this affair to everyone 3. get a good lawyer to understanding your options. 1. yes and clean 2. yes. OM is not in a relationship because he's a dirtbag. But all friends and family know what she's doing. 3. yes. Divorce is proceeding
Author 96nole Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 And I started another thread called "my story (kind of long)" if you want to read it.
Ninja'sHusband Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I think he just wanted to shoot the **** and hear some good stories His official thread is this one: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/marriage-life-partnerships/infidelity/322629-my-story-kind-long
nofool4u Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I'm new here. My W is cheating on me and I've thrown her out. She's now living with the OM, who lives with his mother. I would love to hear some stories of affairs ending bad for the cheater and the OM or OW. Here is one for you. My x-wife is now married to her OM. And she is now being abused verbally, and she did end up with a black eye from him, as word would have it, because, and get this, he didn't trust her.
whichwayisup Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Your wife is in a fog, the affair fog where everything is good and happy. She isn't being realistic (I read your other thread)..This guy is a loser, 40 years old, still living at home with his mom, doesn't work really and your wife has tons of health issues.. Right now she's on a high and enjoying this fantasy life. That's what it is...And soon, when reality hits (when she gets sick and wakes up/ realizes where her stupid and selfish choices has led her, she'll have tons of regret) she's going to come back with her tail between her legs, begging you for forgiveness and for you to take her back. Do nothing. Go on with your life, focus on good friends and family..IGNORE your wife (It'll be hard but it's the only way for her to learn what life will be like without you in it) and get some counseling too to help you cope with all this. There's no way their affair will turn into something long term/long lasting..Judging by what you've said about him and her health issues. 2
whichwayisup Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 1. yes and clean 2. yes. OM is not in a relationship because he's a dirtbag. But all friends and family know what she's doing. 3. yes. Divorce is proceeding Her loss, not yours. And one day she'll be full of regret, shame and wish she didn't choose that cheating pathway. 1
Author 96nole Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Here is one for you. My x-wife is now married to her OM. And she is now being abused verbally, and she did end up with a black eye from him, as word would have it, because, and get this, he didn't trust her. That's awesome. I hope she's miserable.
nofool4u Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 That's awesome. I hope she's miserable. I'm sure she is, but she loooooooves him so.
Author 96nole Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Your wife is in a fog, the affair fog where everything is good and happy. She isn't being realistic (I read your other thread)..This guy is a loser, 40 years old, still living at home with his mom, doesn't work really and your wife has tons of health issues.. Right now she's on a high and enjoying this fantasy life. That's what it is...And soon, when reality hits (when she gets sick and wakes up/ realizes where her stupid and selfish choices has led her, she'll have tons of regret) she's going to come back with her tail between her legs, begging you for forgiveness and for you to take her back. Do nothing. Go on with your life, focus on good friends and family..IGNORE your wife (It'll be hard but it's the only way for her to learn what life will be like without you in it) and get some counseling too to help you cope with all this. There's no way their affair will turn into something long term/long lasting..Judging by what you've said about him and her health issues. I actually doubt she'll be back. This is the second time she cheated on me with that douche bag. She was remorseful and begged last time. This time, not so much. For selfish reasons, I hope their relationship goes down in flames. But i think she is dumb enough to stay. She must love all the pretty words. He knows he has a sugar mama and will keep telling her what she wants to hear. I've seen the credit card charges online, she's paying for all their dinners out. And they go out several times a week.
Author 96nole Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 I'm sure she is, but she loooooooves him so. how long ago was it that she married him?
In Like Flynn Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I've seen the credit card charges online, she's paying for all their dinners out. And they go out several times a week. Make sure your lawyer is aware of these charges for she may attempt to claim it as marital debt. Sometimes it may come down to when a divorce or separation was filed. 2
jnj express Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 How about a statistic---97% of all A. hook-ups FAIL. 1
KathyM Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 Well, I'll tell you a story of my sister's ex husband. He cheated on her for the second time, his OW called my sister to spill the beans, and the OW tried to blackmail him. He had to call the police to get her to back off, he lost his wife, his money, his house and his kids. I'd say that was a fitting ending for his little faux paux. 2
Author 96nole Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 Well, I'll tell you a story of my sister's ex husband. He cheated on her for the second time, his OW called my sister to spill the beans, and the OW tried to blackmail him. He had to call the police to get her to back off, he lost his wife, his money, his house and his kids. I'd say that was a fitting ending for his little faux paux. Now that's a great story.
Author 96nole Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 How about a statistic---97% of all A. hook-ups FAIL. That's good. But now that the affair is completely exposed and she is living with him at his mothers house, I guess they can be reclassified as a relationship. When the divorce is over I'm sure they will move in together someplace. So maybe I need to ask how many relationships born out of affairs fail.
SoMovinOn Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 My STBXW's foray into EMR's didn't end well for her. She first had a couple of single incidents which were both disappointments. She finally hooked up with a guy she liked, but he dumped her after about a month. After D-Day, none of them would even talk to her. She is now looking for a place to live, even temporarily, but can't find anything. She's burned all her bridges and is alone. However... this isn't anything I'm happy about. I wish she'd get out and have a wonderful life on her own. It's very sad to witness her self destruction. 2
Furious Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 That's good. But now that the affair is completely exposed and she is living with him at his mothers house, I guess they can be reclassified as a relationship. When the divorce is over I'm sure they will move in together someplace. So maybe I need to ask how many relationships born out of affairs fail. Just wait until he and his mother suck the last penny from her, thats when the "relationship/affair" will fail. 1
Spark1111 Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 96, have you separated your accounts? It is one thing if she chooses to spend her money, but your's too? I hope not. Until a determination of alimony or spousal support is made by the court, protect yourself and cancel credit cards, separate accounts, etc. I kicked my H out after DDAy, and he went to live with his fOW. It lasted 6 weeks. Ninety-five percent of all relationships started as affairs fail within five years.
Author 96nole Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 Just wait until he and his mother suck the last penny from her, thats when the "relationship/affair" will fail. That's what I'm kind of thinking about. Especially if they try to start a race team like they wanted to last year before I found out and put a stop to it. There have been many times over the years I had to control her spending. As a result, we were in a good financial position until all this started. Spark1111: I have a separate account my paycheck goes into. She took me off all her credit cards and I took her off of my card. We do still have some joint accounts but my lawyer is monitoring it. Those accounts are savings and CD accounts. She has taken money out of there and hidden it. My lawyer is aware and will get my half back.
Furious Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 I also suggest if you have a will and she is the beneficiary change it Immidiately!!!!!!
jwi71 Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 It is highly unlikely that the A can transform into a healthy and happy long term R or even a M. But it IS possible. In reality, so what. I hope you have fed for D with cause (adultery). That almost always negates any waiting periods and allows for a swift D. I hope that is the case for you. To feel better about yourself or the universe in general I would suggest a few things: 1) IC. It's amazing. Takes time and is scary and painful but SO worth it. 2) Get out. Don't stay locked up indoors and isolated. 3) Get active. Do something. Anything. Hit the gym or play a sport or join a local group. 4) Get laid. Find a willing partner and f_ck the ever loving shyt out of her. (try and avoid an R with the lady, it won't last). 5) Ignore their life. Hard to do, especially in the beginning but try. They don't matter. 6) Have a plan of action ready for when your W tries to come back. They almost always do (mine tried three times. And three times refused) 7) Trust and obey your lawyer. There is life on the other side. It'll take time to see it, to believe it, but it's there. I'm living proof of how a BS can survive, thrive even, after a straying wife. I am finally happy. I lived my whole my life content. Now I am happy. I have my xWW to thank for that. Keep on plowing ahead. You'll make it. 1
ThumbingMyWay Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 My W is cheating on me and I've thrown her out. She's now living with the OM, who lives with his mother. cheer up.....your first sentence has "FAIL" written all over it. Re-Read that sentence as if you didn't write......do you really think anything good will come at the end of a story with that as the first sentence? you will endure this...and you will become a better and stronger person because of it. 4
Owl Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 cheer up.....your first sentence has "FAIL" written all over it. Re-Read that sentence as if you didn't write......do you really think anything good will come at the end of a story with that as the first sentence? you will endure this...and you will become a better and stronger person because of it. TMW! Nice to 'see' you again, old friend!
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