RonChalant Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 I've been in a relationship with a girl for about a month, we "dated" for a month and a half before this. I feel like she really wants to tell me she loves me...she goes on and on about how she really really really likes me, personally I feel that the fact that I have been really tearing it up in the bedroom and making her cum pretty often has something to do with this. While I can see myself "loving" her, I don't think I could ever be "in love" with her, but she seems to be going down that road. So I need advice
stillafool Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 Be honest with her that you aren't looking for a relationship if you feel she is someone you can't fall in love with. Let her know now that you are only interested in a FWB type relationship so she can prepare her heart.
thatone Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 or not... would she do the same for him? i doubt it.
starla33 Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 I've been in a relationship with a girl for about a month, we "dated" for a month and a half before this. I feel like she really wants to tell me she loves me...she goes on and on about how she really really really likes me, personally I feel that the fact that I have been really tearing it up in the bedroom and making her cum pretty often has something to do with this. While I can see myself "loving" her, I don't think I could ever be "in love" with her, but she seems to be going down that road. So I need advice Yes sex can make a woman fall in love. You should let her go and find someone else. 1
Author RonChalant Posted March 28, 2012 Author Posted March 28, 2012 Unfortunately we are already in a relationship...which kinda sucks because I got into it out of rebounding and trying to forget about my ex, now that im over the ex I just want to be single, but I feel like a huge d!ck doing that. Plus this girl is a damn good catch, smart, in pre law school, genuinely wants to make me happy, I would be dumb to leave her
mickleb Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 I've been in a relationship with a girl for about a month, we "dated" for a month and a half before this. I feel like she really wants to tell me she loves me...she goes on and on about how she really really really likes me, personally I feel that the fact that I have been really tearing it up in the bedroom and making her cum pretty often has something to do with this. While I can see myself "loving" her, I don't think I could ever be "in love" with her, but she seems to be going down that road. So I need advice Sadly, this is true. Sadly the hormones of both men and women can influence them to do and say quite stupid things. Reminds me of that 'What have you done for me lately?' Eddie Murphy sketch(!) I think what stillafool said is the wisest and most noble route for you, though. If she feels she still wants to 'tear it up' with you, you can carry on - guilt free! And she's only got herself to blame if she wants more. A side note, I know I'm elderly and that, nowadays, 'to come' and 'to cum' are used interchangeably but that three letter version just looks offensive to me! Can't we keep to the four letter version, or better still, use a verb like 'to satisfy'?? Should I start my own thread in a different section if I care so much about this?? Am I talking to myself now..??
thatone Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 then don't. no matter how secretive you think you are you are leaving signs and hints. if she fails to pick up on them that's her issue, not yours. keep doing what you're doing, maybe your mind will change.
mickleb Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 Unfortunately we are already in a relationship...which kinda sucks because I got into it out of rebounding and trying to forget about my ex, now that im over the ex I just want to be single, but I feel like a huge d!ck doing that. Plus this girl is a damn good catch, smart, in pre law school, genuinely wants to make me happy, I would be dumb to leave her Well, remember that what our hormones make us feel is not, necessarily, what we actually feel (which sounds like how you got yourself into this pickle). I think the conversation you should be having is one of 'we need to slow down', if you think you might want to stay with this lady. You need to decide what you want to do, first, though. Try not to panic, think then talk it through with her.
udolipixie Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 Yes generally really good sex that induces orgasms can make a woman fall in love as women more than men bond through sex and are released higher doses of oxytocin when they have an orgasm. Probably best suited to be upfront about your intentions and let her decide if she wants to continue or end it.
FrustratedStandards Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 No. It can't. But she will for sure stick around longer.
RiverRunning Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 Never had sex like that, but I'll let you know when I find out.
FrustratedStandards Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 Yes generally really good sex that induces orgasms can make a woman fall in love as women more than men bond through sex and are released higher doses of oxytocin when they have an orgasm. True, but it doesn't mean she will fall in love. I have a girlfriend who only had an orgasm with one guy she dated for a while, but she was never in love with him. She simply acknowledged the fact that the sex was AMAZING, but that's all it was. Maybe some people just confuse the two, or use them interchangeably, but they shouldn't.
volkl1996 Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 Sounds a lot l ike my situation: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/316086-12-months-post-seperation-divorced-now-dating-having-odd-emotions Every morning after a long night of sex, where she had 4, 5, 6 orgasms, I get emails and texts about how much I satisfy her, like no other man has. How "big" I am, how I complete her and how it's wonderful that I just know what to do to her without her telling me. The sex is incredible..she shakes, she shudders, she screams..I love it. Yeah, feels good to hear, nice ego boost, though now she is saying I LOVE YOU...I cannot say the same. Is it the sex? Probably not the whole story though I do think it's a major contributor.
udolipixie Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 True, but it doesn't mean she will fall in love. I have a girlfriend who only had an orgasm with one guy she dated for a while, but she was never in love with him. She simply acknowledged the fact that the sex was AMAZING, but that's all it was. Maybe some people just confuse the two, or use them interchangeably, but they shouldn't. Hence generally and can.
fallenenvy Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 (edited) I think for some (maybe even quite a few) women they can equate it with love because of them crazy hormones. I never allowed myself to be sucked in by sex. When i was a bit younger a very good friend of mine was wonderful at satisfying me in the bedroom. When i discovered i might be having feelings.. i simply sat down and rationalized it and let it get no further than that. He was a good friend.. it was great sex... but we would make an awful couple. And i kept it that way till he and i both ended up with someone we could be compatible with with more than sex. I don't think many women can separate the hormonal feelings from reality tho. With this girl.. you think shes good but you arn't in love with her.. and i think thats ok. Just if she happens to spout the silly i love you phrase (as sooooo many people do long long before they should) tell her you are fond of her but you don't want to say it till you feel it. It can only get as serious as you let it. good luck! Edited March 28, 2012 by fallenenvy
volkl1996 Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 Sorry, wrong thread in my last link: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/319421-so-how-do-you-break-up-someone-nicely-anyway
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