Why did my ex hang out with me if she's still dating another guy

[hoperom]

I will keep this as brief as possible.

 

My ex and I dated for 4 years. She broke up with me and shortly afterwards she starting dating someone else. I'm still madly in love with her! Recently, she was home from school, she called me up and we hung out.. went to the beach and I helped her around her house. At this point I figured that maybe she broke up with her boyfriend or maybe they were on rocky terms. Why else would she hang out with me if she was still dating him? But on Valentines day I saw that she wrote on his facebook wall: "Happy Valentines Day! I love you!"

 

Why the hell did she hang out with me? What this all about?

[Ajax]

Normally I'm a fan of succinct posts, but in this case it might be helpful to have a little more detail, especially how long you've been broken up. It may be that she thinks you're over her and is hoping you can be platonic friends. Or she may be unhappy in her relationship and feeling out the potential for coming back to you.

 

But if it bothers you that much that she's still with her boyfriend then you should probably refrain from hanging out any more.

[Philosoraptor]

She hung out with you because you lack boundaries. It relieved her guilt for ending the relationship and proved to her that you are still an option to bounce back to if her current relationship fails.

 

Solution: Setup boundaries. You can go NC, you can limit your contact with her, you could not allow her to walk on you, etc.

[madball2289]

seems like she is trying to keep you on the back-burner if all else fails. **** that, you deserve to be someone's first choice, not one of somebody's "choices"

[CaliBabe]

Exactly, she is keeping you on the back burner. Do you really want to be someones back up? Second best? NC her and do it fast!

[Ajax]

I'm wondering if this is somehow a troll. The OP has three threads started with the exact same post.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/314069-i-dont-know-what-think

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/314071-why-did-my-ex-hang-out-while-she-dating-another-guy

 

OP: if you want to continue getting advice on this issue, can you provide some feedback, and can we limit it to one thread?

[CaliBabe]

Ajax,

 

Your could be on to something.

[geegirl]

I'm wondering if this is somehow a troll. The OP has three threads started with the exact same post.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/314069-i-dont-know-what-think

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/314071-why-did-my-ex-hang-out-while-she-dating-another-guy

 

OP: if you want to continue getting advice on this issue, can you provide some feedback, and can we limit it to one thread?

 

I think he's not getting the answers that he is hoping to hear, therefore recreates new threads hoping to get new responses that coincide with what he wants to hear.

[geegirl]

1666 all the 6's Gee might avoid your posts for awhile

 

I know! Felt the hairs on my back stand when I saw that, not that I have a hairy back . This makes it 1667! Oh no 1668.

Edited February 16, 2012 by geegirl