lawlz_xD Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Background story: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=306735 Someone had texted me asking a question yesterday, and I responded with "Yes I do" and instead of sending it to that person, I sent it to HER! I swear this was purely an accident. Long story short, it turned into a conversation about why I was "being like this" (her words). I told her straight up why what she did was ****ed up. "Was I just supposed to forget about everything you told me about loving me and wanting me and calling me sweetheart and babe? You said that just 4 weeks ago and all of a sudden you say you met someone." She justifies it by saying "I made it clear that I just wanted a friendship before I even met him. Everything happened so quick. I don't know." I respond with "And that makes it right? How would you feel if you were in my shoes? Knowing everything that has happened this year and what you've just done. How would you feel?" She says: "I'd probably feel horrible, you're right. You have every right to feel the way you do." She acknowledged that she ****ed up with me after that but says she's happy. I just say, "You're happy at the expense of other people's heartbreak and pain." "I didn't deserve any of the things you did to me." She didn't respond after that. This morning, I caved and looked at her tumblr. From last night, at 4AM, she posts. "I've never had something like this" "I've never had anyone that cares about me as much as you do." "I've never had anyone kiss me on the forehead." "I've never had anyone commit to me like you do." "I've never had someone stay up with me until 4AM to do homework with me." and then I see a picture of her kissing him. She just met him 3 weeks ago. I've known and tried for her for a YEAR. What the f?
NasirUK Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 From what I've read she has done things which seem as though she didn't think of you when she did them. E.g. accepting prom invites from other people, kissing another person. It is nice you let those things go over your head as it was early in the relationship, so I praise you for sucking it up and dealing with it. I just don't think she got the message that YOU were with HER exclusively - maybe she is used to open relationships? Sorry if this upsets you but.... you said she was the "most heartless girl in the world" as the thread for the backstory - which confuses me as because I understand that you are caring for her alot and by the sounds of it have been faithful and done alot - then you call her that, behind her back?! if she was the person you love(d) she would mean more, right? Anyways, it seems as though she has moved on and you have not. I am in the same situation and I don't know how to deal with it.All I can say is, Just try not to be so attached to her (if you want to remain friends) and work on your own personality. SUGGESTION I don't know if you have been acting awkwardly around her or even confronted her about this guy. But some of the comments you said would have hurt her. E.G. "Was I just supposed to forget about everything you told me about loving me and wanting me and calling me sweetheart and babe? You said that just 4 weeks ago and all of a sudden you say you met someone." Maybe you can show her you have changed by apologizing for overreacting (you may not think so, but put yourself in her shoes) and tell her that you still care for her alot, and you were just hurt that alot happened for you in a short time and that you are still dealing with your emotions. Say that she means alot to you, it that it is hard for you to let go of her, but in the meantime I want us to be friends and for you to be happy. Hopefully I have helped, Nasir
Rorschach64 Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 No apologies, no nothing, no friends and you know why? Because you deserve better and you told her the god's honest truth, simple as that. Go NC and walk. Don't dwell on why she did x y z just know that you have a bright future without her and you deserve better than her immature crap. I would venture out to say that she only was saying that crap to reassure herself of her decision.
NasirUK Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 obviously my suggestion is if you want to be her friend!
flitzanu Posted November 30, 2011 Posted November 30, 2011 Background story: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=306735 Someone had texted me asking a question yesterday, and I responded with "Yes I do" and instead of sending it to that person, I sent it to HER! I swear this was purely an accident. Long story short, it turned into a conversation about why I was "being like this" (her words). I told her straight up why what she did was ****ed up. "Was I just supposed to forget about everything you told me about loving me and wanting me and calling me sweetheart and babe? You said that just 4 weeks ago and all of a sudden you say you met someone." She justifies it by saying "I made it clear that I just wanted a friendship before I even met him. Everything happened so quick. I don't know." I respond with "And that makes it right? How would you feel if you were in my shoes? Knowing everything that has happened this year and what you've just done. How would you feel?" She says: "I'd probably feel horrible, you're right. You have every right to feel the way you do." She acknowledged that she ****ed up with me after that but says she's happy. I just say, "You're happy at the expense of other people's heartbreak and pain." "I didn't deserve any of the things you did to me." She didn't respond after that. This morning, I caved and looked at her tumblr. From last night, at 4AM, she posts. "I've never had something like this" "I've never had anyone that cares about me as much as you do." "I've never had anyone kiss me on the forehead." "I've never had anyone commit to me like you do." "I've never had someone stay up with me until 4AM to do homework with me." and then I see a picture of her kissing him. She just met him 3 weeks ago. I've known and tried for her for a YEAR. What the f? hate to be the realistic one here. she knows exactly what she did and how you feel. it doesn't matter if you throw those words in her face about how she gets her happiness from pain and misery of others...it's just passive aggressive and she isn't going to care. i know it feels good to vent and be angry toward an ex, but most often you just end up feeling regretful about it and then it makes you want to apologize or try to explain why you're angry...blah blah...and it turns into a vicious cycle. yell at her if you want, but just understand that i DOUBT you're making any impact on her psyche at all. i'd save your breath for better things.
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