ThsAmericanLife Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 Where did I promote a cookie-cutter idea about men and women? I certainly think that there are common traits that women as a whole are known to showcase. I certainly think that there are common traits that men as a whole are known to showcase. But that doesn't mean I think men and women are only one way. Women can be fierce and strong and men can be vunerable and kind. And actually, there are many examples of both of these in the Bible. don't make me go back and retrieve your past posts... Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted October 10, 2011 Share Posted October 10, 2011 (edited) AmericanLife, you are more then welcome to post quotes of things I said and I can further explain in depth my thoughts for your assistance and understanding. I repeat for you: I certainly think that there are common traits that women as a whole are known to showcase. I certainly think that there are common traits that men as a whole are known to showcase. But that doesn't mean I think men and women are only one way. Women can be fierce and strong and men can be vunerable and kind. And actually, there are many examples of both of these in the Bible. Whether you want to acknowledge it or not, there are generalities that can be made about men and women that would ring true for many. And saying that doesn't take away from each person's own personal individuality. There is a reason that most pro sports have a higher male following and that women are the ones that tend to buy Bridal magazines. There is nothing wrong with recongnizing that. And there is no need to claim that admitting that takes away someone's personal individuality or that I am somehow saying that just because women are more known to buy Bridal magazines and men watch more pro-sports that I am somehow saying women can't like pro-sports too. Edited October 10, 2011 by Disenchantedly Yours Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 How do you think i've been making a living? so keep doing it. dont use a man to take care of you. thats just plain lazy I don't need MORE money, I need a man with money so he can actually TREAT me to things like how men are supposed to. Thats not what you said. You said you want a man to take care of you financially. In other words, support you. Not treat you. And sorry, if you are using a man for money, you don't deserve to be treated. Men are not "supposed to" treat women to anything just because they are men. They treat because they want to and feel the woman deserves it. You don't. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 That's what i'm saying though. Some men can't even afford to spend a couple dollars on ONE rose because they don't have enough money. That's why i'm complaining so much. I'm not asking for diamond rings here. And like you said, to save up for a small gift is nice. so are you changing up your stance now? or saying something different because of the backlash you are getting? you said early on in this thread you want a man to take care of you financially. thats a far cry from a small gift once in a blue moon. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted October 11, 2011 Share Posted October 11, 2011 OUCH! holy mackerel Link to post Share on other sites
123321 Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 I have no issue with a woman who expects to be taken care of financially, I will not however tolerate a "have it all" woman for one second. If she wants me to play "my role" then she has to step up and be willing to play hers. If not, she can piss off. I don't care how hot she thinks she is. Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 OP - you seem like you have a lot to learn about give and take before you really have much of substance to bring to a relationship of any depth, regardless of the financial standing of the man. Also, if your work is "the most important thing in the world" to you, as you said earlier, I predict that cleaning a house, cooking, and dressing up will wear thin as a life's mission for you - especially if you do not have any love, or kids (I think no kids is just fine - but a fulfilling life of housewivery would be much fuller with than without them for an energetic young person, IMO). So, I will add that it seems you have a lot to learn about YOURSELF and what makes you tick, what will give you fulfillment, and what your real standards are on a deep level. Link to post Share on other sites
skylarkjv Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 OP - you seem like you have a lot to learn about give and take before you really have much of substance to bring to a relationship of any depth, regardless of the financial standing of the man. Also, if your work is "the most important thing in the world" to you, as you said earlier, I predict that cleaning a house, cooking, and dressing up will wear thin as a life's mission for you - especially if you do not have any love, or kids (I think no kids is just fine - but a fulfilling life of housewivery would be much fuller with than without them for an energetic young person, IMO). So, I will add that it seems you have a lot to learn about YOURSELF and what makes you tick, what will give you fulfillment, and what your real standards are on a deep level. Definitely. Besides, a housewife with no kids is really just a kept woman. And if you find a guy that's willing to feed and clothe you while you do a couple hours of housework a week, then great! More power to you. But being a housewife is more than just cooking and cleaning, it entails taking care of (presumably) your children. Which is then what makes it a full time job. Moms are the ones who work the hard jobs, not maids/cooks. And if you are not looking to have children, and just stay at home while your man works, then you want a sugar daddy. Link to post Share on other sites
azsinglegal Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Men who make money want a woman who makes money - they want to be a "power couple". Unless you want a sugar daddy, in which case...start hunting for men 20 yrs older then you and you'll find what you seek. You need to seek financial security in yourself instead of expecting it from someone else IMO. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Men who make money want a woman who makes money or at the very least want a good woman who loves them. not somebody who sees them as just a paycheck. the former is the type of woman a man won't have any problem taking care of. the latter needs to be alone. Link to post Share on other sites
azsinglegal Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 or at the very least want a good woman who loves them. not somebody who sees them as just a paycheck. the former is the type of woman a man won't have any problem taking care of. the latter needs to be alone. And if you are looking for someone who can take care of you financially, I wouldn't TELL them - it makes you sound selfish and lazy. Just because most men CAN take care of their partner, doesn't mean they want that kind of expectation put on them. I can't imagine a man who wants bonbon eating Peggy. Link to post Share on other sites
SteveC80 Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 The economy sucks were headed for another recession many people dont have jobs you should be thankful that you have a sucessful job right now not expecting more Gain some perspective for once in yourl life, life isnt a fairytale reagrdless of what you were told as a little princess Your entitlement is off the charts,learn how to be a decent loving person not someone with a handout and maybe youll find a good guy one day If youre just looking for a business transaction then good luck finding a sucker but be prepared for most to see through the facade which will leave you alone Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 I can't imagine a man who wants bonbon eating Peggy. Well, let's see....5'9", 34E's, faithful as the day is long, dresses like a floosie, always hounding me for sex, can't cook to save her life, smokes like a chimney. I'll get back to you Link to post Share on other sites
azsinglegal Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Well, let's see....5'9", 34E's, faithful as the day is long, dresses like a floosie, always hounding me for sex, can't cook to save her life, smokes like a chimney. I'll get back to you Smartass. Link to post Share on other sites
Author FrustratedStandards Posted October 12, 2011 Author Share Posted October 12, 2011 Ugh. It's not just about the money, it's the concept. Chivalry is dead here. One ticket to Europe please. Link to post Share on other sites
denise_xo Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Ugh. It's not just about the money, it's the concept. Chivalry is dead here. One ticket to Europe please. My experience is that there's even less chivalry in Europe, or possibly about the same. Obviously this will depend on the country, but my personal experience is that the American men I've dated have done more of the classic holding doors kind of stuff. Link to post Share on other sites
Author FrustratedStandards Posted October 12, 2011 Author Share Posted October 12, 2011 My experience is that there's even less chivalry in Europe, or possibly about the same. Obviously this will depend on the country, but my personal experience is that the American men I've dated have done more of the classic holding doors kind of stuff. My experiences have been different. Link to post Share on other sites
azsinglegal Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Ugh. It's not just about the money, it's the concept. Chivalry is dead here. One ticket to Europe please. Do you know what chivalry means? Look it up. It surely doesn't mean financially supporting my lazy woman. Being generous doesn't mean supporting someone who is quite capable of supporting themselves but too lazy or motivated to do so. Dictionary: the sum of the ideal qualifications of a knight, including courtesy, generosity, valor, and dexterity in arms. Link to post Share on other sites
Sanman Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 This whiole thread reminded me of this: http://www.snopes.com/love/dating/golddigger.asp Link to post Share on other sites
denise_xo Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 This whiole thread reminded me of this: http://www.snopes.com/love/dating/golddigger.asp :laugh: that was funny. Link to post Share on other sites
mr_sexxxy Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 It depends on the messenger, too. A victoria's secret model or girl of equivalent looks wouldn't ever have to say such a thing: it's implied simply because of her appearance. A girl who is not as physically attractive is not going to have the same leverage. My guess is that OP is a bit older, not as attractive, or does not have a realistic understanding of her leverage/value in the dating market. Hence, the bitterness and frustration. Link to post Share on other sites
mr_sexxxy Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 I suppose that did come off wrong yes. I just think that if a woman spends so much time trying to look pretty for this date, makeup, dress, perfume and all, the LEAST a man can do is pay for her meal. Cuz believe me she probably spent more money on the perfume, makeup and shoes that she is wearing just for YOU. And thank you Cracker Jack. Most men don't get it. I'm not asking for jewellery or a ferrari. I'm asking for you to pay for ONE of my f*ckin drinks. Is that too much to ask? If you are making that much of an effort to be presentable, and still don't have the leverage you want, that answers your question right there. You are not attractive enough to demand the type of value you are seeking. Keep in mind now that there are young, beautiful women who have jobs and are willing to spend money of their own. You have priced yourself out of the market. Link to post Share on other sites
Sanman Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Originally Posted by FrustratedStandards I suppose that did come off wrong yes. I just think that if a woman spends so much time trying to look pretty for this date, makeup, dress, perfume and all, the LEAST a man can do is pay for her meal. Cuz believe me she probably spent more money on the perfume, makeup and shoes that she is wearing just for YOU. And thank you Cracker Jack. Most men don't get it. I'm not asking for jewellery or a ferrari. I'm asking for you to pay for ONE of my f*ckin drinks. Is that too much to ask? See, this I disagree with. You are not wearing these for me. I prefer my gf wear flats because all the women I date always wear heels and end up complaining their feet kill them. Somehow, those heels end up in my hands by the end of the night. Listening to a whiny girl while carrying their shoes is not my idea of sexy. Wear sensible shoes so I don't have to carry them. Women wear these things to look good compared to other women. Sorry, a pet peeve of mine and running joke with my gf (though she has conceded I was right several times while walking painfully in heels). Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 And if you are looking for someone who can take care of you financially, I wouldn't TELL them - it makes you sound selfish and lazy. it doesn't make them SOUND that way Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted October 12, 2011 Share Posted October 12, 2011 Ugh. It's not just about the money, it's the concept. Chivalry is dead here. chivalry is for women that care for their men. and believe me, its not dead. so if its dead for you, then guess what? Link to post Share on other sites
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