smudge21 Posted August 31, 2011 Share Posted August 31, 2011 I'm sure the reasons you think that is the case aren't the real reasons it happens. When we don't know the answer, we often just make up what we think it should be, and when we're feeling down, it's never something positive. May I ask how old you are and how old most of these guys were - their average age I guess. Maybe there's also a pattern in where you meet them or how you meet them. First impressions often do last and are most important, so if there's something going on during that first meeting, it can set the tone for how things are going to proceed. I definitely don't believe you should judge yourself on the opinions of a few, but maybe there is something you do that attracts the type you're not really looking for, the type that simply isn't appreciative of you and who you are. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dumpedandsore Posted August 31, 2011 Author Share Posted August 31, 2011 I'm sure the reasons you think that is the case aren't the real reasons it happens. When we don't know the answer, we often just make up what we think it should be, and when we're feeling down, it's never something positive. May I ask how old you are and how old most of these guys were - their average age I guess. Maybe there's also a pattern in where you meet them or how you meet them. First impressions often do last and are most important, so if there's something going on during that first meeting, it can set the tone for how things are going to proceed. I definitely don't believe you should judge yourself on the opinions of a few, but maybe there is something you do that attracts the type you're not really looking for, the type that simply isn't appreciative of you and who you are. im late 20s..those guys are in their 30s.....first meeting..usually ends on a good note, they acted gentlemanly, paid for all expenses, it was a good date Link to post Share on other sites
Author dumpedandsore Posted August 31, 2011 Author Share Posted August 31, 2011 im late 20s..those guys are in their 30s.....first meeting..usually ends on a good note, they acted gentlemanly, paid for all expenses, it was a good date I am here to rant again..sorry this is just an avenue for me to coping with my gaping wounds.. I have tried very hard to change my life. Books always said (like the secret), you attract what you think in your life, if you negatively, you attract negativity in your life. I have been trying to revamp my thinking/processes system by thinking positive. it doesnt work. Saying is easy, doing it and getting results at the end of the day is tough. Honestly, im pretty sick of trying to be positive, trying to constantly accept my situation and struggles and move on. The truth is, i am not happy, im totally miserable and no matter what i do or did (if u refer to my list of measures i have taken), it doesnt improve. Im stuck. How much can i move on? if i have been moving on all the time, and i always meet with every other guy who said no to me right on the spot. I look at people around me. No, they dont have to read, work hard or think positively. Things come to them naturally. They progress in life, true love, marriage, a good job I have nothing now..quit my job, in a jobless predicament, no mood to work. Dumped and rejected for the straight umpteen times in a row.. I do know whats wrong in my life. Learning to live with it and coping/dealing/making sense out of it day in day out is very tiring and miserable.Everday, (almost every minute of my life), i wondered why am i dump..why dont they consider me.....why so objectable about me?Why am i rejected instantly...why? I just dont get it.... It seems like quiting everything seems like an easy choice. I pray to god, even god gives up on me. I dont want to live a life of rejection time and time again, until i die of misery, hopelessness and loneliness one fine day...with a total broken heart and zero self-esteem. feeling like dying..nobody cares..its me , myself and i. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dumpedandsore Posted August 31, 2011 Author Share Posted August 31, 2011 I am here to rant again..sorry this is just an avenue for me to coping with my gaping wounds.. I have tried very hard to change my life. Books always said (like the secret), you attract what you think in your life, if you negatively, you attract negativity in your life. I have been trying to revamp my thinking/processes system by thinking positive. it doesnt work. Saying is easy, doing it and getting results at the end of the day is tough. Honestly, im pretty sick of trying to be positive, trying to constantly accept my situation and struggles and move on. The truth is, i am not happy, im totally miserable and no matter what i do or did (if u refer to my list of measures i have taken), it doesnt improve. Im stuck. How much can i move on? if i have been moving on all the time, and i always meet with every other guy who said no to me right on the spot. I look at people around me. No, they dont have to read, work hard or think positively. Things come to them naturally. They progress in life, true love, marriage, a good job I have nothing now..quit my job, in a jobless predicament, no mood to work. Dumped and rejected for the straight umpteen times in a row.. I do know whats wrong in my life. Learning to live with it and coping/dealing/making sense out of it day in day out is very tiring and miserable.Everday, (almost every minute of my life), i wondered why am i dump..why dont they consider me.....why so objectable about me?Why am i rejected instantly...why? I just dont get it.... It seems like quiting everything seems like an easy choice. I pray to god, even god gives up on me. I dont want to live a life of rejection time and time again, until i die of misery, hopelessness and loneliness one fine day...with a total broken heart and zero self-esteem. feeling like dying..nobody cares..its me , myself and i. everytime i know a guy, i thought can know each other better, before i know it, he has written me off completely or tell me..he has someone in mind that he could introduce to me.. (instant rejection) Link to post Share on other sites
smudge21 Posted September 1, 2011 Share Posted September 1, 2011 This is more than just being dumped by guys isn't it? There's a lot more going on here and some stuff deep down that is affecting you and your life right now. Maybe you don't even know what it is. Many people have pasts that affect their future without even knowing it, it's all subconscious stuff that we lock away, but it's never truly gone. I know myself I have issues, some reason why I seem to care more for those that care less for me - I tell you, if a girl really shows interest it kinda' puts me off, but if there's a challenge there, I steam head first in and really go out of my way. Scary and has led to so much heartache. Instead focusing on just these guys or work or basically one seperate thing, maybe you should see it as a whole. That there's something there making you feel the way you do and therefore giving off a negative vibe. I don't know, I'm no doctor or therapist, but with you having such low thoughts right now I honestly believe you need to find out what the cause is, and deal with it quickly. Nothing is worth giving up everything for, so please don't. Link to post Share on other sites
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