JohnEl Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 this sucks. i dont know what to do without my girlfriend. we spent every second together. i lost touch with some people during the three years i was with her. now, saturday night, i have nothing to do. my friends are will their girlfriends and im at home alone. my ex has some friends here and i know shes out enjoying herself while i sit here alone. i used to have so much fun every night but now i cant have fun even if i do go out. how much longer is this going to last??? things were so much better just two months ago. now everyday is boring and i cant have fun. i try to go out and do things but i just cant have fun without her. this is the hardest thing ive ever had to deal with. Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 You got wheels? Hop into it and drive to another town or somewhere you and her didn't go too. You got to go out and start talking to people and make new friends. I know this life is hard on all of us here. My life is changed too but I try to make the best of it. I talk to everyone I meet up with. This way I know, I won't go into that lost and never found way. Just have to change your life around. She's done it now it's your turn! Link to post Share on other sites
reimeivn Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 You should get a dog. You should get a fish also. Some of them. It will pass in like 2 months, you will feel fine, just a little bit off sometimes. It does take time and try to be easy on yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Nohbody Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 The loneliness is hard to deal with at first. A pet might be a good idea. I've been thinking about getting a service animal... Link to post Share on other sites
Author JohnEl Posted August 21, 2011 Author Share Posted August 21, 2011 I have a dog. I used to have two but my ex took the other one. I'm usually ok with the loneliness but just these weekends when I have nothing to do are horrible. I haven't cried much in about 5 days but did tonight. I think about how she should be here with me right now. I still can't believe we arent together anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
reimeivn Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 Get a puppy. And a plant also. You need a new sense of life. You need to see something growing because it helps the light inside your heart. Link to post Share on other sites
Nohbody Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 It wasn't that long ago that I was in the exact same place you are. Without a dog. You've made better progress than I did, and before you know it the pain is going to level out, the hurt will subside some... and you can begin getting on with it. Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 Nothing better than your dog to keep your company then. I have mine with me and the sw has the other one. I still say take your dog for a ride and head out to the park and such you'll meet more people who have dogs like you too. Make new friends. Link to post Share on other sites
Nohbody Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 Chicks dig a guy with a well-groomed dog. Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 I was thankful to have my dogs after the break up. It made me feel less lonely. At least you still have your other dog. After my break up, whenever I was home, they were never a foot away from me- followed me everywhere as I was moping and crying. If I sat on the couch they'd be smooshed up against me on either side. Animals can be very comforting, so I am glad you still have yours. I'm sorry to tell you that the missing and the pining doesn't go away overnight, it comes and goes in waves. You're still in shock, you'll have panicky moments, moments of disbelief, fleeting moments of anger followed by extreme sadness.... It sucks, but that's part of the process we have to go through. Just hold onto to the knowledge that it doesn't last forever. If you've lost track of some old friends, look to reconnect with them. Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 I keep my German Shepard with me when I sleep I don't want to be by myself. After the breakup it hasn't been that easy. My pal is always near me and this was his first trip away from his birth home. I felt bad leaving the other dog a Choc Lab but nothing I could do she'll have to raise him now. Both dogs I've raise and trained since they were puppies. To be good dogs friendly first though. I told my other dog listen dad has go, be good and you take care of yourself and remember what I had taught you. That dog had left his paw to shake hands I knew he knew something was up. They're smart you know. It was sad to leave him but I know he'll be good, I hope though. Well dogs can be there for you too.. No matter what they're always be with you.. Link to post Share on other sites
light_vader Posted August 21, 2011 Share Posted August 21, 2011 Hi there. You know, most of us here have been through hard times like that. Some have had it worst than others. But Imma start off by telling you something. Most people are not happy with their lives. Most people feel like they need love or appreciation from "someone" in order to survive. Yeah, from a male perspective, having a girl by your side is great. I miss, more than my girlfriend, the things I did, like giving her poems, getting all philosophical on her trying to get her mind out of the dark places it'd go to, kissing her freckles for hours, holding her, kissing her tummy, the sex, bla bla bla. But those are things I can do in the future and in much better, more creative ways anyway. I put her in a pedestal for a long time, but now I just say what the heck. To be honest there is this part of me that doesn't go along with my new lifestyle and improved mindset and is shallowness. It kills me but just like smoking (I've tried to quit unsuccessfully for the past month) is something I HAVE to overcome. When I say shallowness I mean it in the sense that sometimes I just miss her ass. You know? Hahaha. I have to see her everyday at work (she works int he cubicle diagonal to me). But hey, check this out. Society in general is polluted with losers. You know what a loser looks like? There are two main kinds. The one that sees problems in his/her life and chooses NOT to face them, this kind of loser deep inside enjoys the smell of defeat. Either problems or mistakes, that person never learns but keeps on "trying". Now, there is the second kind, then one that sees obstacles along the way and just gives up and cries upon him/herself. The winner, the rare kind, is the kind of human being that understand life is though and filled with obstacles but ALWAYS finds a way to defeat those and move along the way, improving his/her vision of life, surroundings, others and ultimately him/herself. Same way with the mistakes he/she might commit. So it's your call dude, if you wanna be like the rest or take the plunge and make the best out of this opportunity (your current breakup) to focus on you, to improve your mindset, to get your pieces back together and stand from "the rest". Look at my ex, from what I perceive (and it's unfortunate but like I said she's like 4 meters away at work so I have to bare with it!!!), she is apparently back again the vicious cycle of angry, fight, make-up with the "other guy" or other guys, don't know because she's been attending skank-fest 2011 hehe but seems like she's just committing the same mistakes we did in our relationship, because she never took the time to improve herself. She doesn't care because if I know her well, she climbs from guy to guy trying to find "perfect love" without taking sometime in between to heal and reflect upon her life. This is what the common Jane and Joe Doe do in our society nowadays. Yeah I know, sometimes being lonely feels... lonely, but solitude is important in order to build up your mind, your self-esteem. To love yourself like nobody will ever do. Sometimes I think with this new mindset it will be harder to attract girls, because to be honest right now I'm neither interested in one night standers, nor in people that are emotionally stupid. But then, I say to myself, what gives, I'm sure there are a lot of others just like me out there, waiting to engage in a great healthy relationship, just they will be harder to find. things were so much better just two months ago. If you read closely at what I just posted and agree with some of it, you'll realize this statement is not really close. You weren't in a healthy relationship, so how come they were just better? this sucks. i dont know what to do without my girlfriend. we spent every second together Which is another mistake. I also did the same and used to think it was right but now I know we were just mixing up our lives into one, with no space for the life of each, so I ended losing my identity and just gave in to the freaking robot I was for the 2.5 years we spent together. As always the key will be to focus on yourself. Like I said before nobody can love you more, than you can, yourself. So don't expect to encounter real happiness and a world of healthy relationships if you are not completely satisfied with your life as an individual. Have a nice week. Link to post Share on other sites
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