oaks Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 I would think the last one is such an obvious deal breaker one wouldn't even think to mention it. Maybe, but I know some people who are legally separated (which means different things in different places) yet live in the same house as their not-yet-ex-spouse and still manage to go on dates and have relationships. I draw the line somewhere before that, but not everybody does.
betterdeal Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 Maybe, but I know some people who are legally separated (which means different things in different places) yet live in the same house as their not-yet-ex-spouse and still manage to go on dates and have relationships. I draw the line somewhere before that, but not everybody does. I used to work with a chap whose wife decided to divorce him and have a sex change. They shared their house for a couple of years after the divorce, both with girlfriends on and off. Different strokes for different folks.
Purple Glow Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 (edited) People that have a long list of dating dealbreakers. Just about everyone I know that has a really refined taste in music cannot stand pop music. They can't just relax and enjoy themselves. Expectations are too high. Knowledge brings out the cynicism, intolerance, and judgmentalism in people. And even worse, it seems like once you reach that point, there is no going back to being happy. You can't undo the damage. Likewise, the more knowledge is gained about dating and relationships, the quicker it is for a lot of people to judge and dismiss people who actually could be great matches if they just put a little effort in. That's what pushes people into living a life alone - they marry a list of dealbreakers instead of a real human being. People need to forget all their rules and just go out and have a good time. Discovering what the person has to offer isn't going to get done with a long list of "no"s. Have an open mind. Be tolerant. Don't judge. Edited August 28, 2011 by Purple Glow
skelterhelter Posted August 28, 2011 Posted August 28, 2011 (edited) Nearly all the women here have 'drugs' in their list. Does this mean most of you have had a history of past BFs who were druggies? In my experience, in dating and with friendships, you will always place second to that person's drug of choice. I've had friends who've ditched me to do it and boyfriends who won't want to hang out because they're too baked to function. I dated a guy who would lie and make excuses about what he was doing that day and why he couldn't hang out with me, when he was actually just getting high with his friends. (I was in my teens at the time and less experienced with dating and didn't think this would be such an issue when involved with him. Needless to say, I now know better and use judgement). It's a complete turn off for me. Plus, it's just not fun to be the sober one while hanging with a group of high people. I guess I can tolerate it more in my friendships, but I have a hard time swallowing the fact my boyfriend would choose drugs over me. I don't want to date someone with messed up priorities. And I have nothing in common with someone who wants to do that sort of thing because I don't agree with it. Edited August 28, 2011 by skelterhelter
Abhuman Posted August 29, 2011 Posted August 29, 2011 Assuming I'm physically attracted to them, I then hope these red flags don't pop up. -clingy -whiny and complains a lot -lets people walk over her/doesn't put her foot down when people cross her line -too apathetic and indifferent -difficulty motivating herself to do things -creepy obsession with anime culture -doesn't do some sort of exercise(I'm not a health freak but I do try to stay in shape, like if I want to go for a day hike she should be able to come along and not be totally out of breath the entire time.) -works way too much -boring to talk with or has a very monotone voice -talks about exes willingly It's not like I have a checklist or anything. But when I notice these things it's like "abort mission, return to base".
AHardDaysNight Posted August 29, 2011 Posted August 29, 2011 1. Smoker 2. Drug abuser 3. Doesn't like animals, especially cats 4. Bad taste in music 5. Doesn't read 6. Not attractive to me (this is personally attributed to me and my tastes, not everyone else's) 7. Doesn't want children 8. Extremely religious, or extremely non-religious (I prefer someone who's halfway in the middle) 9. Is extremely into sports (believe me, we would not get along!) 10.Is an airhead/unintelligent
D-Lish Posted August 29, 2011 Posted August 29, 2011 1) Bad Teeth 2) Bad hygiene 3) Anyone with a "player vibe" 4) Low sex drive 5) Insecure 6) Overly needy 7) Talks about ex's on the first date 8) Looks old enough to be my dad even though he's the same age as me 9) Doesn't like animals 10) Is too serious
Memphis Raines Posted August 29, 2011 Posted August 29, 2011 1. has cheated in the past 2. smokes 3. likes to party, going to clubs especially 4. has a tramp stamp 5. has a history of being attracted to bad boys
betterdeal Posted August 29, 2011 Posted August 29, 2011 People that have a long list of dating dealbreakers. Just about everyone I know that has a really refined taste in music cannot stand pop music. They can't just relax and enjoy themselves. Expectations are too high. Knowledge brings out the cynicism, intolerance, and judgmentalism in people. And even worse, it seems like once you reach that point, there is no going back to being happy. You can't undo the damage. Likewise, the more knowledge is gained about dating and relationships, the quicker it is for a lot of people to judge and dismiss people who actually could be great matches if they just put a little effort in. That's what pushes people into living a life alone - they marry a list of dealbreakers instead of a real human being. People need to forget all their rules and just go out and have a good time. Discovering what the person has to offer isn't going to get done with a long list of "no"s. Have an open mind. Be tolerant. Don't judge. Good post!
CarrieT Posted August 29, 2011 Posted August 29, 2011 1. Smoking 2. Drugs/Alcohol abuse (light drinking okay) 3. Born-again Christian 4. Bad hygiene/teeth 5. Lack of intelligence (Must be able to converse) 6. Morbidly obese (I don't mind hefty if there is health) 7. Sexual ineptitude (I don't want to have to teach you) 8. Profanity (hate men who sprinkle their conversation with it) 9. Close-mindedness (not open to new things) 10. Indifference to food (I'm a gourmande who loves to eat)
FrustratedStandards Posted August 29, 2011 Posted August 29, 2011 1) kids 2) bad hygiene 3) stupidity 4) small penis
Recommended Posts