zengirl Posted July 22, 2011 Posted July 22, 2011 Hey, I hear you. I just barely started exploring online dating. I don't have a real profile or any pictures up yet, but I have messaged a few guys who intrigue me, and a few guys have messaged me, I guess based on the limited fill-in fields of info on my profile (height, body type, profession, age, etc.). So far, I am totally unimpressed. The ONE guy I messaged who seems like a great match for me on every level ignored my message completely. I wish I knew why. Even if he told me he thinks I'm unattractive, that's fine. I'd just like to know why. If you get plenty of dates in the real world, I'd focus on that, and use OD as a backup option. I came to OD because I am not meeting many quality guys in the real world -- but so far, the pickings don't seem to be any better online. As with anything, I guess you have to dig through a ton of rocks to find a gem. Did you have a proper profile up on the site where you messaged that guy? (I know a lot of people who won't write those without proper profiles.) I understand the pain of "not knowing" and you'll never know, but just a thought.
Ruby Slippers Posted July 22, 2011 Posted July 22, 2011 Did you have a proper profile up on the site where you messaged that guy? (I know a lot of people who won't write those without proper profiles.) I understand the pain of "not knowing" and you'll never know, but just a thought. No, but I sent him a detailed message commenting specifically on all our points of commonality (physics, music, science, philosophy, food, cooking, progressive ideals), and included two pictures and a song that I wrote and recorded at home (something he likes to do, too, and says he would love to do with his woman). And nothing. I couldn't believe it! I am going to be a little bummed about this one for a long time. But I'll get over it.
zengirl Posted July 22, 2011 Posted July 22, 2011 No, but I sent him a detailed message commenting specifically on all our points of commonality (physics, music, science, philosophy, food, cooking, progressive ideals), and included two pictures and a song that I wrote and recorded at home (something he likes to do, too, and says he would love to do with his woman). And nothing. I couldn't believe it! I am going to be a little bummed about this one for a long time. But I'll get over it. Oh, so basically you put the profile stuff into the message. Interesting. I've never experienced that or known anyone who's done it, but it shouldn't be a big thing if someone digs you. I've had that happen too, though. And there was one guy I wrote on OKC who had a 95% with me, some common friends with me in real life (but I'd not met him), and wrote me every day--- several times a day --- for 3-4 weeks then dropped off the planet. I had already alluded to meeting, so he knew I was interested. I ran into him once after and asked him what happened (because I'm crazy like that) straight up, and he said, "I have never met anyone I really liked from online. It seemed too risky." Then why are you on the site and why do you answer the question "Willing to meet someone on here?" with "Totally!" and so on! He then asked me out, but I was seeing someone. People are just weird sometimes. We all have our little hangups.
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