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Consolidated Discussion - Older/younger woman/man and age gap dating

sleepykitten

By sleepykitten
in General Relationship Discussion

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RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

Posted
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You called it what it was. A spade, and totally agree with you. I have often told women, regardless of their age, if they are a PITA, to HIT THE FRIKKEN ROAD!!!

 

I just don't have time for head games. (Sorry Foreigner).

 

What is a PITA?

thefooloftheyear Established Member

thefooloftheyear

Posted
Posted
What is a PITA?

 

 

Pain In The Ass......like me!!:laugh:

 

 

TFY

  • Like 1
RedRobin Established Member

RedRobin

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Pain In The Ass......like me!!:laugh:

 

 

TFY

 

You are totally a pain in the ass. Haha.

 

Oh, and FYI... I told a guy I am potentially buying a bike from today that I don't like to DRIVE other peoples bikes. Lol. He was giving me a little early crap that he doesn't allow test drives. Yea, ok. I wouldn't either if I had a mint street bike that squids like to drive, oh pardon me, RIDE.

 

I am looking at Suzuki GSXRs... preferably a 750.

  • Like 2
hotpotato Established Member

hotpotato

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I tell them that all the time... usually well before they hit 35+. Men too.

 

 

Except that, it's usually only men who get told the world is their oyster until they are past middle aged and beyond. Women get that message long before then. It's only the 20 something women who are truly a bit dense about it, and I warn them too.

 

Right. Men need to get real,; they are not eternally hot to young women. Ive gotten flack for this, but here goes. Dating much younger women is generally for rich or financially stable men. Just because Hugh Hefners of the world do it doesnt make it attainable for most men. George clooney has married someone younger, but hes rich and attractive.

NJ123 Established Member

NJ123

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You're lumping people into categories when not everyone fits into the same one. Age is a numerical factor, not always a fact, when it comes to dating. Just saying....

 

Well obviously I know lots of people don't care about age gaps when it comes to dating. But lets be realistic here, if lets say a guy is 48 years old, what the **** is he going to have in common with a 23 year old woman that he's dating? Their from a completely different generation. Usually in that situation the older guy is wealthy & the woman is a 10/10 in looks. But I highly doubt they'd have much in common.

  • Like 1
Anela Established Member

Anela

Posted
Posted
I tell them that all the time... usually well before they hit 35+. Men too.

 

 

Except that, it's usually only men who get told the world is their oyster until they are past middle aged and beyond. Women get that message long before then. It's only the 20 something women who are truly a bit dense about it, and I warn them too.

 

I'm glad that I *was* dense about it in my twenties, instead of lugging around all of this age-related worry that gets thrown at women when they're 35+. So much crap. I want to be happy! I want young women, middle-aged women, and older women to feel as good about themselves as they can.

 

I wish the same for men, too, as long as they don't treat me, or my friends, like ****. Although they might be nicer, if they were happier. I know that I am.

melodymatters Established Member

melodymatters

Posted
Posted
Well obviously I know lots of people don't care about age gaps when it comes to dating. But lets be realistic here, if lets say a guy is 48 years old, what the **** is he going to have in common with a 23 year old woman that he's dating? Their from a completely different generation. Usually in that situation the older guy is wealthy & the woman is a 10/10 in looks. But I highly doubt they'd have much in common.

 

Well, I'm here to prove you wrong, lol ! I'm 47, H is mid 20's and we have a lot in common. We both work and pitch in for bills. There's pics in my profile, and neither of us is a supermodel, lol. I'm not sure why growing up with the same TV shows is such a big deal, especially since we never watch TV. We both tend to like the same movies and bands, but mostly we like EACHOTHER !:love:

 

It's just like a having a friend of a different age or culture or country of which I have many. We just happen to really like to f*ck eachother too.:D

  • Like 4
xxoo Established Member

xxoo

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Posted
Right. Men need to get real,; they are not eternally hot to young women. Ive gotten flack for this, but here goes. Dating much younger women is generally for rich or financially stable men. Just because Hugh Hefners of the world do it doesnt make it attainable for most men. George clooney has married someone younger, but hes rich and attractive.

 

The reason these arguments fall flat is that we all know non-wealthy men who are married to younger women. Most of my peers are with similarly aged partners, but there are a few who are married to younger women (age gaps 10+ years). These are normal couples, and it's a non-issue.

 

I just don't see what the big deal is.

  • Like 2
CaliGuy Established Member

CaliGuy

Posted
Posted
Well obviously I know lots of people don't care about age gaps when it comes to dating. But lets be realistic here, if lets say a guy is 48 years old, what the **** is he going to have in common with a 23 year old woman that he's dating? Their from a completely different generation. Usually in that situation the older guy is wealthy & the woman is a 10/10 in looks. But I highly doubt they'd have much in common.

 

It's a mental thing, not so much a physical thing is what you do not understand.

 

You are totally a pain in the ass. Haha.

I am looking at Suzuki GSXRs... preferably a 750.

 

I have a 2011 CBR1000RR Repsol version. Got the first one that came into the US :)

 

Well, I'm here to prove you wrong, lol ! I'm 47, H is mid 20's and we have a lot in common. We both work and pitch in for bills. There's pics in my profile, and neither of us is a supermodel, lol. I'm not sure why growing up with the same TV shows is such a big deal, especially since we never watch TV. We both tend to like the same movies and bands, but mostly we like EACHOTHER !:love:

 

It's just like a having a friend of a different age or culture or country of which I have many. We just happen to really like to f*ck eachother too.:D

 

See, I can't argue with that at all!

 

The reason these arguments fall flat is that we all know non-wealthy men who are married to younger women. Most of my peers are with similarly aged partners, but there are a few who are married to younger women (age gaps 10+ years). These are normal couples, and it's a non-issue.

 

I just don't see what the big deal is.

 

There isn't. Some people simply cannot grasp this in their own version of what the world should look like or not.

  • Like 1
melodymatters Established Member

melodymatters

Posted
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... And let me add, I misspoke about TV, we both LOVE comedy central: South Park, John Stewart, Tosh.0, but what REALLY matters is the SUPPORT we give each other.

 

I lost my only child suddenly when we had only been married a year and had just relocated to my home town. Now THAT is some tough stuff to deal with, but you know who was there for me every day in every way ? My "non generationally correct" husband. If that's not a deep and real relationship, I don't know what is.

  • Like 1
CaliGuy Established Member

CaliGuy

Posted
Posted
... And let me add, I misspoke about TV, we both LOVE comedy central: South Park, John Stewart, Tosh.0, but what REALLY matters is the SUPPORT we give each other.

 

I lost my only child suddenly when we had only been married a year and had just relocated to my home town. Now THAT is some tough stuff to deal with, but you know who was there for me every day in every way ? My "non generationally correct" husband. If that's not a deep and real relationship, I don't know what is.

 

I'm so sorry for your loss. I cannot even begin to fathom how tough this has been for you.

 

BIG HUG!!!!

  • Like 1
melodymatters Established Member

melodymatters

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Good to see you here again Caliguy ! June 2005 and August 2006, we are some oldtimers in Loveshack years ! Thanks for your condolences, it's something you learn to live with but never get over. Best to you and whatever or whomever you want !

  • Like 1
melodymatters Established Member

melodymatters

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And here's a funny age gap story : I used to be in the music biz a bit, so I definitely keep up with modern music. Five finger death punch came on the car stereo playing their cover of " Bad Company" ( obviously originally done by the band Bad Company, lol).

 

I started singing along word for word and my husband looked at me in shock, asked how in the hell I knew every line to a brand new Five finger death punch song. :lmao::lmao::lmao:

 

A little lesson in music history followed.:cool: Compared to SO many issues I had in same age relationships in the past, I really don't see this as a "problem"LOL.

  • Like 2
NJ123 Established Member

NJ123

Posted
Posted (edited)
Well, I'm here to prove you wrong, lol ! I'm 47, H is mid 20's and we have a lot in common. We both work and pitch in for bills. There's pics in my profile, and neither of us is a supermodel, lol. I'm not sure why growing up with the same TV shows is such a big deal, especially since we never watch TV. We both tend to like the same movies and bands, but mostly we like EACHOTHER !:love:

 

It's just like a having a friend of a different age or culture or country of which I have many. We just happen to really like to f*ck eachother too.:D

 

Well, genuinely good for you. It's just your situation definitely isn't the norm. When there's a huge age gap usually it's a short term fling for them unless one of them is wealthy like I said. I hear about it all the time about older women wanting to sleep with younger guys just for fun, but not for anything serious. For me personally anything more than 10-15 years tops is too much of an age gap for me.

Edited by NJ123
hotpotato Established Member

hotpotato

Posted
Posted
The reason these arguments fall flat is that we all know non-wealthy men who are married to younger women. Most of my peers are with similarly aged partners, but there are a few who are married to younger women (age gaps 10+ years). These are normal couples, and it's a non-issue.

 

I just don't see what the big deal is.

 

I havent seen any 20 year olds dating 50,60,70 year old men. Like you said, most people date someone who is their own age. I dated a man who was nearly 20 years older. To be honest, I probably wouldnt have dated him if he had the finances of a typical 20 year old.

 

Elderly men need to get real. Very very few young women will sleep with them or marry them unless tyey are rich.

hotpotato Established Member

hotpotato

Posted
Posted
I

 

 

 

There isn't. Some people simply cannot grasp this in their own version of what the world should look like or not.

 

Um, I dated a man about 17 years older than me.

 

Only on ls (and in the minds of old men) do people believe women want men old enough to be their father or grandfather! Its to the point that old fat wrinkly 60 year olds think they are hotstuff to young women.

CaliGuy Established Member

CaliGuy

Posted
Posted
Good to see you here again Caliguy ! June 2005 and August 2006, we are some oldtimers in Loveshack years ! Thanks for your condolences, it's something you learn to live with but never get over. Best to you and whatever or whomever you want !

 

Thanks!! I am dong BETTER THAN EVER (trust me, I'm being honest. Loving life and everything it has to offer). I'm in a position now where the choices are plenty but I'm just picky guy. I know what I want and am patient enough to wait :)

 

I havent seen any 20 year olds dating 50,60,70 year old men. Like you said, most people date someone who is their own age. I dated a man who was nearly 20 years older. To be honest, I probably wouldnt have dated him if he had the finances of a typical 20 year old.

 

Elderly men need to get real. Very very few young women will sleep with them or marry them unless tyey are rich.

 

Usually a money thing, honestly. Not love.

 

Um, I dated a man about 17 years older than me.

 

Only on ls (and in the minds of old men) do people believe women want men old enough to be their father or grandfather! Its to the point that old fat wrinkly 60 year olds think they are hotstuff to young women.

 

Again, see above. If the age gap is that large, "Benjamins" are involved.

melodymatters Established Member

melodymatters

Posted
Posted
Thanks!! I am dong BETTER THAN EVER (trust me, I'm being honest. Loving life and everything it has to offer). I'm in a position now where the choices are plenty but I'm just picky guy. I know what I want and am patient enough to wait :)

 

 

 

Usually a money thing, honestly. Not love.

 

 

 

Again, see above. If the age gap is that large, "Benjamins" are involved.

 

Again ! LOOKS, LOOKS, LOOKS, LOOKS, LOOKS ! Every adjective is so appearence oriented. And Money. Are we all REALLY that shallow nowadays ? Maybe not everyone plays the league's or capitalism at all costs game and if they find someone their soul connects to, GOOD FOR THEM. And maybe they don't do the laundry list thing,( a personal pet peeve). But I don't judge others relationships. If "One" thinks people of a certain age are disgusting, fine, don't f*ck them. If you find someone who heals your heart, my advice is hold on like crazy and don't worry about money, degree's, or wrinkles, sheesh !

 

Peace out for now friends, off to see the play of one of my protegees in an historic mansion, "Lizzie Borden Took an Axe" :laugh:

melodymatters Established Member

melodymatters

Posted
Posted

Meant to quote the whole post, in a rush, didn't mean to single you out Caliguy ! <3

CaliGuy Established Member

CaliGuy

Posted
Posted
Again ! LOOKS, LOOKS, LOOKS, LOOKS, LOOKS ! Every adjective is so appearence oriented. And Money. Are we all REALLY that shallow nowadays ? Maybe not everyone plays the league's or capitalism at all costs game and if they find someone their soul connects to, GOOD FOR THEM. And maybe they don't do the laundry list thing,( a personal pet peeve). But I don't judge others relationships. If "One" thinks people of a certain age are disgusting, fine, don't f*ck them. If you find someone who heals your heart, my advice is hold on like crazy and don't worry about money, degree's, or wrinkles, sheesh !

 

Peace out for now friends, off to see the play of one of my protegees in an historic mansion, "Lizzie Borden Took an Axe" :laugh:

 

Meant to quote the whole post, in a rush, didn't mean to single you out Caliguy ! <3

 

 

No worries. All I am saying is if they are <18, then these "kids" have no idea who they are or what they want and the last thing they need is a "twisted" adult telling them they should get involved in sex with them. It's mind games with children.

 

NOT cool....

  • 2 weeks later...
Tayken Established Member

Tayken

Posted
Posted

Studies have shown that a straight man will always find women in their mid-20s sexually attractive, whatever his age.

 

Have you ever caught yourself checking out a woman only to realise that she's much younger than you? Well, don’t beat yourself up too much. Blame science.

 

Last month, a study published in the Evolution and Human Behaviour Journal revealed that men have a tendency to be sexually attracted to women in their mid-twenties. The study of 12,656 Finns also affirmed that both younger and older men veered towards women of this age. Which begs the question: why are men so obsessed with twentysomething women?

 

 

 

Why are men so obsessed with 24-year-old women? - Telegraph

Robert Z Established Member

Robert Z

Posted
Posted (edited)
Studies have shown that a straight man will always find women in their mid-20s sexually attractive, whatever his age.

 

Why are men so obsessed with 24-year-old women? - Telegraph

 

 

I agree that we all have the caveman in us but I think there can be other factors as well. I'm 55, my sb is 24, and I've been seeing her for over two years. Beyond the natural beauty of youth, and she is way above average, I was immediately attracted to her free spirit and sense of adventure. Her perpetual optimism is invigorating. Also, she didn't come with all of the attitude issues about men that my ex and many women her age seem to have. I am so sick of women treating men with a sense of entitlement. I have been surrounded by this my whole life. For the first time I met a woman who broke this mold. And it soon became evident why she was different; at least one big reason. She is too young to have been trained by women's lib to resent men. She even understands my frustration and sees the same thing in her mother and how she treats men.

 

Back to the notion of youth, she is like a breath of fresh air. She challenges me to keep up. She sets a high bar. She makes me better. She makes me feel young. And because this also reflects in my health and fitness practices, being with her actually makes me healthier, which essentially makes me younger. It is no joke. My health and fitness compared to three years ago are like day and night.

 

 

Many people might be inclined to call this a midlife crisis. But I consider that an insult. It is just more condescending crap directed at men. It sounds like some kind of silly phase that men go through when in fact it was a matter of life and death. I came very near the edge and credit my sb with helping to save my life. And even if I die tomorrow, I will have had most of three incredible years that almost never happened - three of the best years of my life.

Edited by Robert Z
  • Like 1
ComingInHot Established Member

ComingInHot

Posted
Posted
I agree that we all have the caveman in us but I think there can be other factors as well. I'm 55, my sb is 24, and I've been seeing her for over two years. Beyond the natural beauty of youth, and she is way above average, I was immediately attracted to her free spirit and sense of adventure. Her perpetual optimism is invigorating. Also, she didn't come with all of the attitude issues about men that my ex and many women her age seem to have. I am so sick of women treating men with a sense of entitlement. I have been surrounded by this my whole life. For the first time I met a woman who broke this mold. And it soon became evident why she was different; at least one big reason. She is too young to have been trained by women's lib to resent men. She even understands my frustration and sees the same thing in her mother and how she treats men.

 

Back to the notion of youth, she is like a breath of fresh air. She challenges me to keep up. She sets a high bar. She makes me better. She makes me feel young. And because this also reflects in my health and fitness practices, being with her actually makes me healthier, which essentially makes me younger. It is no joke. My health and fitness compared to three years ago are like day and night.

 

 

Many people might be inclined to call this a midlife crisis. But I consider that an insult. It is just more condescending crap directed at men. It sounds like some kind of silly phase that men go through when in fact it was a matter of life and death. I came very near the edge and credit my sb with helping to save my life. And even if I die tomorrow, I will have had most of three incredible years that almost never happened - three of the best years of my life.

 

Now wait a second... I'm pretty much perpetually 'glass half full' girl. Many 25 + girls can't keep up with me. Thing is, I don't put myself in a category with a 20 something girl, because I'm not :)

I guess I don't understand the 'bitter old women' comment? Most women I hang with are fun and happy and have no angst against men*

...and my stbx Cheated on me with a 28yr old... a few years back anx that didn't make me think poorly about men, just him lol*:D

I believe there are a few of us women who are an exception don't you think? *

  • Like 3
Tayken Established Member

Tayken

Posted
Posted
Also, she didn't come with all of the attitude issues about men that my ex and many women her age seem to have. I am so sick of women treating men with a sense of entitlement.

 

Hallelujah to all of this, especially to the words in BOLD. In the past 2 months, I have began to tell myself that I now see why most men go for the younger women as opposed to the ones in my age group and old.

 

If this nonsense carries on, I might have to go against what I have avoided all my life, date a younger person.

 

If you find someone who heals your heart, my advice is hold on like crazy and don't worry about money, degree's,

 

Er...back up there, ignore the lack of degree and money at your own peril, especially if you are the higher earner. God forbid things go South, you can find yourself paying CS and alimony indefinitely depending on length of the marriage, while she goes off banging someone else. Luckily for me, I escaped this but am conscious of it due to the entitlement mentality.

Anela Established Member

Anela

Posted
Posted

And I'm sick of men treating younger women as something they're entitled to, and treating us "older" women as something to be treated badly, and why? Because we don't look as good as we did ten or more years ago? Thanks a lot.

 

I've said before: I don't feel that old. You know what makes me feel old? Men my age! Those who "prefer someone younger" as though they're better than I am.

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