chloe56 Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 I decided to wade into the online dating world, decided to try OKC as quite a few members on here use it, so I thought it can't be bad. Well, I get a couple of half naked guys saying hi,and a guy that cannot spell writing to me ( these people are in the UK). Not that I am a free of typos but these guys are really bad. Anyway, just to kick start my life as its been nearly a year that I am single, not dated (getting desperate here ) and since the guys I wrote to did not even bother replying, I decided to meet up with the bad speller after a few exchanges. The logic behind that being that he might be more reasonable than the other two. He stood me up!!!!! I had a mate look at my profile, just to get feedback, all he said is that since I speak another European language the guys might be apprehensive of my intentions. Really???? I don't think I am scary looking or unintelligent, but come on. What does someone have to do to get a date around here?
Rinas Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 Online dating gets ridiculous at times, hang in there. I've experienced some crazies. If you sense that there is a red flag at the begging don't settle because other's aren't replying. Just keep messaging those who you take interest in. I had numerous mails, but only a few were reasonable. Many were rather harassing, and far from what I was seeking. Don't give up just yet!
Author chloe56 Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 Hey thanks. I suppose I just feel awkward what with most guys on here saying how easy it is for women blah blah shallow blah blah and then my reality is that despite being specific....nothing reasonable. Oh! Expanding search zone, there has got to be a reasonable male out there..... I hope.
Rinas Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 I know, they assume it's so easy for us women, yet we have to weed out all the guy's with bad motives. I have had numerous men send me very vile messages in which I felt violated to even read. They go straight to the trash. Any man with a shirtless pic also goes unread.
Author chloe56 Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 That's lovely Lady Day! Hope i get lucky eventually. About the shirtless pics, what in the world are they thinking of? I suppose I will laugh about it later, but my goodness my profile can not be that bad that I am not getting messages.
Rinas Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 I have no idea, but in my mind any man who feels the need to show off his shirtless body on his profile is not my type. I don't think it's anything wrong with you, don't stress! Id ask to see your profile, but I'm unsure if you'd want to link it.
Author chloe56 Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 I would feel uncomfortable to link it here. Apart from paranoia, I can't think of why else, yet but who knows...
Rinas Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 Understandable Just hang in there anyway, there's got to be some good guys there.
oaks Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 but my goodness my profile can not be that bad that I am not getting messages. Depends what it says. I've seen lots of profiles that are basically interchangable... they have lots of words but really just boil down to "I like staying in and going out and having fun". Do you say things that are unique? Things that give a man something to ask you about? It also depends on your photos. I don't mean that you might be ugly! but I do mean that the quality of the photos needs to be good. There's no excuse for grainy poorly lit photos, or photos where you're a tiny speck in the distance. Some people prefer to see at least one full-length photo to get an idea of your body shape.
oaks Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 I would feel uncomfortable to link it here. Apart from paranoia, I can't think of why else, yet but who knows... There's a forum on OKC where you can ask people to review your profile. Be prepared for both harsh and inappropriate comments, though.
Author chloe56 Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 Ok, fair points. My username is Miching on OKC and any constructive feedback is greatly appreciated. I only have one photo up were I am not so clearly seen because I do not photograph well at all. Oh dear.
oaks Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 Ok, fair points. My username is Miching on OKC and any constructive feedback is greatly appreciated. I only have one photo up were I am not so clearly seen because I do not photograph well at all. Oh dear. You've basically said nothing about yourself apart from your music tastes (but you seem to like pretty much everything) and I see that you have a cat. This doesn't distinguish you from any of the other single women in London! (well, maybe they don't all have cats.) Consider expanding a little on what those long term goals are, or what you're really good at. If the only thing you're good at is "lazing about" then what kind of guys do you think you'll attract? Add more photos! Keep that photo, but some that show your whole face would be even better. Get a friend to take them, outside in daylight.
Author chloe56 Posted July 17, 2011 Author Posted July 17, 2011 Thank you for that will try to expand on profile pronto!
grkBoy Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 I don't think I am scary looking or unintelligent, but come on. What does someone have to do to get a date around here? All I can say is grow a thick skin so you don't get easily hurt by the insanity. Be patient. Maybe also try a pay site on top of OKC. You might meet guys more serious about dating because they're shelling out money to be there.
NoReallyThatHappened Posted July 17, 2011 Posted July 17, 2011 With online dating I found that I had to search for the type of guy I was interested in rather than waiting for those kinds of guys to come to me. Otherwise it was a lot of "u r hawt" and "wanna %$#@?" Neither type of email is very appealing. So don't be afraid to send some emails yourself.
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