tonzer20 Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 We dated 4 times, and on the 4th dates got intimate. I asked her if she just wanted to date each other and she said she didn't know what she wanted and might just end up alone. She is also just out of a 3 year relationship. I also suspect she is dating other people. a) Should I wait? b) was I too soon to ask even though we were intimate Its really got my head messed up what to do.
bluenightowl Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 " I also suspect she is dating other people." I bet my money on it bro, she is a multi-dater. Yes, confirmed she is. Would that be a deal break for you? I like the idea of being cool, patient, and now dating other people as well, but another side of me isn't into getting sexual and dating. On the one hand, its good to be cool, not get too excited, just chill, have fun, and not make her a priority and give her space. After all its only 4 dates. Its nothing really, and yet something happens to you when you get sexual with someone that you know is also dating other people. I've been thinking about this a lot. I think there is difference between getting sexual with someone and seeing how it goes... and the break it off. been there and it didn't really bother me. but getting sexual with someone who is dating other people.. even if it too early to be exclusive someone bothers me. Would it bother you? Its happened to me once before and I find getting dumped for another person feels like you have been used... and yet I struggle to just chill about this. I suspect for me, I'm best to NEXT her, but explain why. Have any of you felt this way? My brain seems to be right on the line of being cool with this and just relaxing and the other side feeling she ain't the one for you.
thatone Posted July 10, 2011 Posted July 10, 2011 the thing is you gotta read those signs and make your decisions on the spot, without second guessing yourself. you also need a standard course of action when these situations arise. if you pitch exclusivity to her and she gives the response that the OP got, you relegate her to "booty call" status. you know at that point there's no relationship potential here, so forget about it and don't second guess yourself. look for other women but if she wants to hang around for sex only, go with it. the daily calls/texts stop, and the chasing stops, and any contemplation of a future with her stops. call her on thursdays to fish out whether she's got another date on friday/saturday, and if not continue for the sex. spend your sundays, mondays, tuesdays, and wednesdays looking for someone else. pretty simple.
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