very young potential bf..

[fuzzletonic]

hi guys ive been lurking around here for a while now so i decided to write.

 

my english is kinda weird so pls bear with me.

 

anyway i have been friends with this guy for 4 years. he was like..lets say, 17 and i was 24. we werent lovers, just friends. we have all these conversations and we just click. although i am experienced in relationships and stuff, and of course he isnt.

 

this guy isnt like the same as everyone though, he is very intelligent. he skipped high school 2x and skipped another in college. it sounds kinda shocking but that is just one of the few. aside from that, got his masters at 20 yrs old and was fully employed as a ...i'd rather not say it but he works for a government contractor company or something like that (like halliburton, ge, etc)

 

i was just out of a really bad relationship last year. he consoled me, and he was there for me. it was a really really bad time. i got dumped, i dont know why. it just happened without any warning. so he and i got really close and it made me think that this guy is worth it to spend my time with, cause he listened to my pathetic whining, crying among other horrifying things i did (not eating for days, not showering..) yeah i think i took that last relationship way too seriously.

 

anyway this guy ..i really admire him. i have admired him for such a long time but it never really occured to me to be in a relationship with him..i mean he is so young. i feel like a puma. ladies, is this wrong? my girl friends are in awe of him too and they havent mentioned anything about the age. and yeah if you guys counted it, i am "pushing" 30. i have a job and all though. he keeps telling me he wants to pay for everything, and that he has money now ..which makes me giggle. this guy was really stingy back then, in a fun way.

 

suffice to say, its very very easy to love someone who you admire. i dont know if its love yet..but he wants to be in a rel. with me and wants us to live together. i just cant really..i dont know how to look at this.

 

i have a male friend my age who is dating a girl whos like 22..but their rel. isnt weird. i mean, i dont think so at least, nobodys judging them. but i feel like i will be.

 

example if he brings me to a company party..i look young though but i have a demeanor of a mature person and i dress pretty maturely. my make up is mature. everything about me reeks mature.

 

has anyone dated someone very very young? i just feel like, i dont want to ruin his life, i have kept telling him to date someone his age and just "grow" in their relationship but he brushes it off.

 

i am worried and i dont wanna hurt him, i really also dont wanna lose him as a friend. by the way i have never slept w/ him, or kissed him. like i said a decision to be an official couple has to be made.

[hendersongirl]

I don't think the age difference is anything to worry about! It's only 7 years. And you said yourself, he is intellectually advanced and mature. He probably doesn't get along with people his own age. I'm the same, I am only ever attracted to people at least 5 years older than me. That's both men and women, both for friendship and romantically.

You have known each other for 4 years, that's a long enough time to know that you get along well and have a lot in common. Age really is just a number, when the pair is compatible, loving and the relationship is one between equals.

As for taking you to company dinners, I can't understand why that would be an issue. But surely that is not enough of a reason to let a great relationship pass you by! That sort of thing can be discussed with him, when it comes up.

I know plenty of people in relationships with much vaster age gaps (my 35 year old guy friend is with a girl 16 years younger (19!) and it is very healthy, despite what everyone who doesn't know them thinks. Another guy friend is 26 with a 34 year old girlfriend. He is an example of someone who is simply not attracted to women in their 20s).