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How young is too young?


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Posted

I happen to know a guy that is 18 and he has a 15 year old girlfriend, he also has talked about feeling her up and talks like he wants to or has done more. Before that I heard from another girl that was younger that he tried to get her into bed. Something just doesn't seem right.

 

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What if the girl is 15 years old and she is friends with a 21 - 22 year old and their friendship turns into more. That they both fall in love with each other? If they both wouldn't do anything that is illegal and wouldn't have sex until she's older (like 18 or older) (and if they were still together), shouldn't the two be allowed to be together? Especially if the parent (or parents) of the 15 year old know the guy and trust him?

 

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What are your opinions and advice? Cause for these situations above, they can easily be reversed and the girl could be the older one instead. What should be done how should it be handled? After all, some say age doesn't matter and time someone is 18 they can be with someone older by their own choice.

 

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I would honestly have to say I am confused by all of this and actually wonder what others think about the whole thing.

Posted

An 18 year old is closer in maturity with a 15 year old than a 22 year old is.

 

That being said, there is still a maturity gap, and things will never be equal.

 

I'd say that the gap doesn't close until the girl is, say, 21 or 22 and you're 27 or 28. Any younger and older than that, and you're bound to have a maturity gap.

Posted
teenagers would serve society better if they studied but they waste time with parties and sex when theyre not ready

 

I had this discussion with my mom today, after going out to eat and sitting next to a bunch of rowdy teenagers.

 

I said, "They fit the stereotype of the typical Disney teen show perfectly! They even talk the same!"

 

She said, "it's a maturity thing. Their brains are still growing."

 

And you know, it's very true. That's why I said that a 15 year old and an 18 year old are not the same. Even the most mature 15 year old is not going to be mature enough for the 18 year old...which is why statutory laws exist in the first place.

 

Why I said 21 is different is, by 21, a person's brain has stopped growing, and is fully matured. Certainly by 23. Someone who's mature (22, 23) should look for someone who's also mature.

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Posted

I would have to agree with you all on that. I myself have a friend and she is close to me and at times I have to warn her that she is crossing a very thin line. Unlike the first two I mentioned, we're just friends. I happen to feel that is better.

 

I have found out that for my state, the laws state that a 16 year old can get married at that age but only with Parental Consent, it even seems it is the same with allowing a relationship.

Posted

18 and 15 is nothing. some younger friends of mine came over to my house a couple weeks ago and them being 22-24, i assume the women they bring to be roughly the same age, and i was informed at one point that i was flirting with an 18 year old. whoops!

 

whatever they put in food these days that makes kids grow up that fast is dangerously deceptive :eek:

Posted

What about 18 and 21-22, would you think there is a maturity gap there?

Posted

Sounds like he needs a visit from the local police.

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Posted
Sounds like he needs a visit from the local police.

 

Who needs a visit?

 

For me, she and I are JUST friends.

I would say that my friend that is turning 19 and his girlfriend is 15 might need that visit though. He is doing things that are just illegal with her. I don't even know how he gets away with it. Her parents don't even know that they are in her bedroom together at times, and then are even alone together.

Posted

If the age of consent is 16 where you are then wait a few months till she turns 16 and you’ll be good. Usually the parents have to press charges so if you have their permission you’ll probably also be good. Really as long as you don’t get her pregnant, admit to anything, or have pictures or video you’ll probably be good.

 

Morally I think you have to take it on a case by case basis. I wouldn’t want myself (a guy) or a girl at 15 dating some one who was to much older. I’d be nervous about an 15-18 year old relationship. Once they are 18 I think the age gaps don’t matter as much. (but still can)

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Posted
If the age of consent is 16 where you are then wait a few months till she turns 16 and you’ll be good. Usually the parents have to press charges so if you have their permission you’ll probably also be good. Really as long as you don’t get her pregnant, admit to anything, or have pictures or video you’ll probably be good.

 

Morally I think you have to take it on a case by case basis. I wouldn’t want myself (a guy) or a girl at 15 dating some one who was to much older. I’d be nervous about an 15-18 year old relationship. Once they are 18 I think the age gaps don’t matter as much. (but still can)

 

At age 16, a person can get married in NY state, legal age to consent to sex is 17 with another 17 year old, 18 for anyone 18 and above. Strange that you can get married at 16 though.

 

For me and my friend, there is a circumstance, her mom knows me not her dad, she lives with her dad and not with her mom. Only sees her mom every other weekend and then she invites me over. We only know each other through her older sibling that I met in school, her brother. Her mom at least knows and likes me. Her father has never met me. I bet that is the same for many people now a days though.

 

It is slightly different for the first person I mentioned who is going to be 19 with the 15 year old. One thing is for sure though, I would never do what he is doing, it just isn't right.

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Posted
What about 18 and 21-22, would you think there is a maturity gap there?

 

I don't really think so.

Shouldn't (Wouldn't) how the other person makes you feel be a part of it, not just maturity? Shouldn't the older person know how to handle the relationship and know what is right and wrong and actually communicate that to the other person?

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