fishtaco Posted June 20, 2011 Posted June 20, 2011 Ahh, the beautiful Material Girl. The woman I've been hoping to establish a romantic relationship with. Physically she is the perfect specimen for my sensibilities. A bit older for me at 43, but she aged with class, with firm body from dedication to exercise and healthy diet, flock of glorious raven hair, velvet soft olive skin, and the way she dances... oh my... it was as if the angels held her body while the devil moved her hips. Too bad she's a user. And double too bad, I was too stupid to see it until three weeks into my mission to win her heart. I honestly feel like a stupid noob. All the signs where there. She would throw me a bone once in a while with passionate kisses, then it's back to arm's length. It wasn't a smooth progress. It consisted of repeated "ramping up", only to reset the next time, resulting in zero progress over all. But if you only look at a small section, it felt like progress. This lady is good, but more likely, I'm just really dumb. She's was previously the plaything of a Latino dance instructor. Oh yeah. This deserves it's own TV show. The guy is sleeping with some old lady millionaire who is paying for his living expenses. He teaches Latin dancing for fun and for nailing pretty ladies. Namely, women like Material Girl. I just came off of a disappointing ending with Violet, and I was too eager to start something new, so I handed Material Girl my own head on a silver platter. Her original plan for me, was to use me to get a reaction out of the Latino dance instructor. And a reaction she certainly got. Just not what she was hoping for. The dance instructor showed his true colors, and turned into a grade A a-hole. She's was angered by this, and decided she needs to disconnect. She's also a weak person, that's why she would try to use me to go back to the dance instructor, knowing full well he will not give up his source of income... the old rich lady. A weak person cannot just detach. That person needs someone else in order to help them accomplish this task. So this is now my new purpose. I will be her anchor point, to give her the strength to pull away from the dance instructor. First establish NC, then emotional disconnect. Unfortunately for me, once the mission is accomplished, she will tell me something like "Oh Fishtaco, you've been so wonderful to me, I want to be friends with you forever". Then she'll go find someone else. Better late than never. At least I've realized this now. Most of our dates were cheap. Maybe $10 or so. A couple of dinners were a bit more. As far as opportunity cost goes, I missed a zero effort ONS, and I missed a chance to interact with Shakira, who will be my new target. Overall loss wasn't that much. The real loss here is how stupid I've been, and I need to be more vigilant. So maybe it's not a loss after all. I am now a bit more cynical, but also hopefully a bit wiser as well. I have not verbally disconnected from Material Girl yet, so she doesn't know this is happening. She'll know I've mentally checked out soon. Oh BTW, during our last conversation, she wanted me to buy her a concert ticket for an artist she likes. Haha. This chick has no shame when it comes to asking for things.
carhill Posted June 20, 2011 Posted June 20, 2011 The good news is, with her superficially attractive qualities, she'll easily find more dustbunnies to suck up and you'll be forgotten. I've come to see that as merciful. Sour the milk enough and she'll move on without looking back.
Author fishtaco Posted June 21, 2011 Author Posted June 21, 2011 I had an interesting talk about Material Girl with one of my friends. He's big on the whole Catholic guilt thing, being he's a... recipient himself, even though he is no longer religious. He said this Catholic guilt thing is built into many Hispanic cultures. Even though Material Girl is no longer practicing, it affected her upbringing. So his perspective, is that Material Girl actually does like me, and it came out in those bursts of random passionate make-out sessions. But then her Catholic guilt would kick in, and she would pull back. So she's fighting her own inner desires, as opposed to some sort of premeditated plan to string me along. He also doesn't think that after the dust settles, she's just going to tell me how great I am, shake my hand, and be platonic. He thinks she really does like me. But for me to get into a relationship with someone like that is asking for trouble. I'm not sure if that's a correct assessment, but the end result is the same. He said her actions shows that she's a little girl acting immaturely. And I should get the heck out anyway. So whether she's just confused or an evil mastermind, I need to bail out. Semi good news, I may be meeting up with Shakira Wednesday, no date, just going to be at some place with a group of mutual friends. At this point I don't even know if she's single and available. But this is my chance to find out. If Shakira falls through, I've exhausted my current options. Not interested in White Lace anymore. The long term plan would be to hang out with "Tattoo". I don't like her romantically, in fact I think she's kind of crazy. But she has a lot of female friends, mid 20 to mid 30's. So maybe this time I'll end up with someone my normal target age range for a change.
thatone Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 (edited) i got to be the jealousy generator for one recently myself. guess it was about 4 or 5 months ago. turns out the target was her boss. they had a FWB type thing and he got bored when a younger, thinner girl came to work, of course. one day she was throwing hints about which rooms in my house she liked, the next was a text about spending a holiday with the so-called ex. but you couldn't explain to this one that she never had a relationship with the boss, she was just a low maintenance warm spot for him when he wanted it. she was even sobbing about "i hope we never break up again" when i left her place for the last time. i thought about telling her "you gotta have him before you can break up with him" but meh, she wouldn't have listened anyway, she's living in a fake world full of imaginary bullsh*t. how delusional people can be. now that you mention it, the one i found was also catholic. not sure if there's a connection there or not. Edited June 21, 2011 by thatone
welikeincrowds Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 I'm not sure if that's a correct assessment, but the end result is the same. He said her actions shows that she's a little girl acting immaturely. And I should get the heck out anyway. That's good. fishtaco, I am looking forward to the day when you meet a girl who doesn't leave you asking questions. I think you might put too much pressure on yourself to expertly perform the dating ritual, when most results are dependent on whether 1) the girl is inherently a match for you and 2) the circumstances allow you to see each other. I just don't want you to be beating yourself up for something that, in my opinion, all boils down to dumb luck.
Feelsgoodman Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 You make it sound more complicated that it really is. A 43 year old woman who is attractive (for her age anyway), takes dance classes, put great effort into being in good shape and gets around? The woman is obviously damaged good.
Author fishtaco Posted June 21, 2011 Author Posted June 21, 2011 That's good. fishtaco, I am looking forward to the day when you meet a girl who doesn't leave you asking questions. I think you might put too much pressure on yourself to expertly perform the dating ritual, when most results are dependent on whether 1) the girl is inherently a match for you and 2) the circumstances allow you to see each other. I just don't want you to be beating yourself up for something that, in my opinion, all boils down to dumb luck. Thank you. The thing is, I did have one. And I got into a serious and committed relationship with her. But... I was dumb and I screwed it up. So now I'm back on the scene testing my dumb luck. And you bring up a good point. I'm always trying to improve my performance. I think it made sense for before, because I didn't know what I was doing. But I've reached a reasonable level of dating capability for awhile now, and I've been enjoying reasonable successes of "getting women". But, I've been getting crappy women, like you said, because of dumb luck. And in fact I remember Untouchable_Fire mentioned something similar in an unrelated thread, that really stood out for me. So in a way, that's good to know it's not me. But in a way, that's bad because there's nothing I can do about dumb luck. Thank you, your post gave me a different perspective to think about.
Recommended Posts