Author nowwhatnow Posted March 28, 2011 Author Share Posted March 28, 2011 wow thank you for sharing. it is nice to know i am not alone in my pain. i would recommend living with your mom. I was at school and was not near my family and I really needed them. it was hard not having them around and i think it would have been easier. after being a bit better i have moved countries and made new friends and am hardly along. being alone is the hardest thing. its when the memories infiltrate your thoughts. i dont know what to say about how to get past this. i think upon my return home i will try and see a therapist. i just do not know what else to do as in my mind i have done everything so far but do not feel better. and yes i know that it will take time argument but i really need to start feeling better. suggestions are always welcome! Link to post Share on other sites
Rose T Posted March 28, 2011 Share Posted March 28, 2011 i dont know what to say about how to get past this. i think upon my return home i will try and see a therapist. i just do not know what else to do as in my mind i have done everything so far but do not feel better. and yes i know that it will take time argument but i really need to start feeling better. suggestions are always welcome! Nowwhatnow, I came out of a relationship in December, it was a truly awful break-up and I suffered very badly for the first three months. But what I have found really helpful was building my new friendship groups and volunteering / church activities, which I would recommend even if you're not religious, as a way to get involved with communities of people different to yourself. I know you've been making new friends and if you're abroad (like me!) there are also often expat groups for meetups etc. I really think the depth and breadth of your new friendships can help speed recovery. I'm now four months after the break-up and I'm starting to feel great, now i was with my ex for five years and he cheated and left for the OW which was really hard to bear as I loved him very much. You do have to work on loving yourself and giving the love you had for your ex to new people, not just in a romantic sense, but by giving and spreading a little happiness where you can. It's worked for me anyway! I've really been going out of my way to pay forwards kindness in my life and without sounding cynical, it is really paying off. It's something my new friends recognise and I feel more centred and grounded than I have perhaps ever in my life. I do think that by realising my full potential in this way I will ultimately find new love. So dig deep. Be kind. But above all, be kind to yourself and appreciate the 'project' that you represent, without focussing on your's exes faults any more if you can. Link to post Share on other sites
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