Do ex's ever try to get back in touch?

[1784]

In my case, some exes have gotten back in touch while others haven't. It really all depends on the situation, the person, etc. There's no real rhyme or reason to it. I think some of it may have to do with what happens AFTER the breakup as well. It two people go seeking happiness after the initial break, which is human nature, one party may find it and one may not. The one who does not will be much more likely to make contact, for a number of reasons. One may be to see if the other is doing as poorly. another reason may be just to check in as a means of furthering their own healing. a third may be apologize and continue on. And sure, sometimes they want to see if they can have back what they once thought they could do without. All of these has o do with the person.

 

In my case, I'm not really sure if my most recent ex will try to contact me. I know for sure I won't try to contact her. We're both pretty stubborn people but she's the one who ultimately ended it and for a pretty selfish reason. I think she has some guilt over it but she is a master at justifying her actions, as wrong as they might be. She can easily tell herself that THAT is just what she needed to do at that particular time and leave it at that. Right or wrong, she'll feel that she needed to do it. That she needed to step away from us. She never admits wrongdoing nor does she apologize. That's just how she's built.

 

I really don't know. On one hand we never lost the "love" for one another. Even when we said goodbye we admitted that we still had the love. It was more the compatibility that was in question. After some time she may want to revisit what she had with me. I have no idea. The thing is, she has a very picture-framed idea of what her life should look like. Any time adversity or challenge enters into that picture frame she has a very hard time handling it. Her coming back to someone who she has broken up with doesn't seem to fit into that picture frame. It's not "ideal". How could she tell her family and friends that she's going back to someone that she broke up with!? Inconceivable! That's just not in the script of the fairy tale!

 

So yeah... there's my two cents. lol

[Scorpio90]

Every ex i've had has tried to contact me at least 1nce after the breakup. Im not a fan of keeping in contact with someone after a breakup ESPECIALLY when im moving on with a new serious partner. I believe that they should stay in their place which would be far away from me as far as contact goes. .....no im not just referring to physical contact either...

[Call Me Al]

She texted you? After ending on bad terms? How weird.

 

 

Our breakup was about as ugly as a breakup can possibly be. I basically cut her off completely but every so often she would send a random text.

 

Probably 9 months after I had deleted her number from my phone and I got a text but I didn't recognize her number off hand.

 

It basically said "whats up?" I replied "Not much, just at work. Who is this?"

She said "It's (insert name here)" to which I kind of was taken aback by. About 5 minutes later I replied "Oh hey"...and she replied "Hey. Want to hang out sometime?" and I said "I dunno. Id have to think on that" and I stopped responding altogether.

 

 

Weeeeeird.

 

I dunno. In relationships, emotions tend to run deep and the women I connect with seem to recollect on that fondly when I am absent.

[Thatguyintx]

Every situation/story is unique. I have some exes that I still talk to, and many I do not. Some came out of the woodwork for closure well after the relationship. Some came looking for friendship. It's good to recognize the uniqueness of each situation. My most current ex maintains no connection with any of her previous exes. Guess I expect the same between her and me. Probably for the best considering where I am at these days!

[jquest1280]

So he broke my heart in a million pieces, and after pleading and begging went nowhere, I went NC. We're in a common group, so it was just Happy Birthdays after that. I never forget his birthday, but I know he has forgotten mine if not for the email reminder in our group email - because when the reminder is late, his greeting is late. Christmas and NY, I would also text him, sometimes he would go first. One New Year's I greeted him, and he did not greet back. A few months later he apologized and explained he had a death in the family that time. Ok.

 

A few times he has sent texts out of the blue. A couple of them were jokes that I thought said in a roundabout way that he missed me. Another was a "Just saying Hi" text just 2 months ago.

 

The blood just drains out to my feet when I get these texts and I don't know how to reply. If they had been sent soon after the breakup, I might have grabbed the chance to get back with him. But it was some years after and it was, oh I think I want to but I don't want to get broken-hearted again. Much later, it was, I'm still fond of him but how do I fit him in the life I've got now, and is he worth the trouble of a re-adjustment?

 

I reply with something friendly, but take care not to sound like the clingy desperate girl who wanted nothing more than his texts years ago. Nothing more has proceeded from these random texts (maybe because I don't rise to the bait?).