mike1988 Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 I'm 22, and I've been with a few women, mostly just ones older than me looking for some fun. I have been in a relationship though that didn't last and I met her online. I work with a ton of women....almost all beautiful and attractive...ranging in age from 18 to 40 years old. But not one of them has shown any interest in me for months! I'm outgoing, nice, talkative...and they show no interest. Some have even began relationships with guys who joined our workplace AFTER I did...proving that I have zero sex appeal. Granted, some do have boyfriends and husbands, but many are young and single. Is 22 a bad age for dating? It seems it's either girls too young for you, girls your age with no attraction and often still in those High School-era relationships, or girls older than you who wouldn't even consider you more than a friend. This is me...I'm not horrible looking...but not "hot". http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs110.snc4/35844_10150205578350061_503070060_13378110_1517621_n.jpg
Tim The Enchanter Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 (edited) Yeah it's almost certainly not your looks. I do think that, unless you look like the elephant man, there will women your age who find you attractive. I think my 20s were incredibly frustrating in terms of dating. I didn't really date, as such. At university I simply chased after girls at clubs and parties. I really wanted a proper relationship but could only managed one night stands. Clearly my looks weren't an issue, as I could get laid. One time a girl just came up to me in a nightclub and said I had a beautiful face. Looking back with hindsight, I realise that I wasn't even close to being proactive enough. If I could get into a time machine or send messages to my earlier self, I would say "flirt with, and ask out as many girls as possible". The truth is that I was scared to ask girls out, and I prefered to just sit back and let the odd one come to me, rather than go after them like I should have done. You say that none of these women you know has shown any interest in you. How do you know that? Have you asked them all out? Do you flirt with them and chat them up? Edited November 29, 2010 by Tim The Enchanter
denise_xo Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 IME, it only gets better with age. Nothing wrong at all with the way you look.
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 I'm not a guy, but from a lot of guys I've talked to (including my boyfriend), early 20's were a frustrating time for them to be dating. You're out of high school and college which are literal breeding grounds for relationships. You're forced to go out and seek love by your own means, whether it's bars, clubs, hobby groups, work, etc. This is especially hard when juxtaposed with the fact that in her early to mid 20's is a woman's easiest time to date. You're not an unattractive guy. Just relax and let things happen. If it's the older women who want to be with you right now, then go for them! Most of the guys I've talked to have said they reached their dating peak in their late 20's to early 30's.
kiss_andmakeup Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 My experiences have shown me the "good girls" perhaps hit a bar or club when it's a fun night out with friends...but they're not there religiously every week in a miniskirt and heels. The "good girls" do athletic/social things, they join organizations and maybe do charity work, they read books and drink coffee, etc. Good advice (as a side note, D-Jam, I always really like your posts)! Volunteer groups are great, if you have the spare time. I've volunteered for a non-profit animal rescue for the last 5 years and let me tell you: it's mostly girls (and cute, compassionate ones at that!)! Any guy who joined would be in hog heaven.
BS76 Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 Early 20s for guys sucks. Just remember that the whole paradigm flip-flops where in your early 30s you have all the options and interest from women that women in their early 20s enjoy from men. Get a decent job, stay in shape, and don't settle down with anyone until you're older. You'll be able to get women 10 years younger without a problem and it'll burn up the women your age who can't find a man because guys keep going for women much younger than themselves.
GoodOnPaper Posted November 29, 2010 Posted November 29, 2010 Early 20s for guys sucks. Just remember that the whole paradigm flip-flops where in your early 30s Early 20s was OK in college but VERY bad in the real world. At that age, the dating pool for women is just so much larger than for guys. OP, as difficult as it is, don't let the frustration get the best of you before you get to the paradigm flip-flop -- speaking from experience, getting into an LTR while having a scarcity mindset is last thing you want to do.
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