Jambalaya Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 The boy never asks me about my day. We've been together 2.5 years now and over the last month or so, we've both been out of work, living far away and only seeing each other every couple of weeks. I stated to him a few months ago that communication is going to be important for this awkward time. I don't expect much - a text or two a day, an email every couple of days a phone call at least once a week - you know - catch up, stay in touch, tell each other that you miss each each other and make plans for next time we see one another kind of stuff. That's all been fine. But when we talk he never asks what I've been doing! Last night at the end of our phonecall, I mentioned this and said "See! You never ask!" and laughed. He got a little squeaky and defensive saying "I was going to ask you when I see you next". I don't know if it's because he's not interested in my day, bad on the phone, or is only interested in talking about himself - I do ask him about what he's been doing, the conversation goes that way, but doesn't get reflected back to me. Thoughts?
machiavellian Posted October 6, 2010 Posted October 6, 2010 I think that's just the way guys are. It's probably one of the ways women are socialized differently from men, or something like that. Women are taught to be considerate of others while men are not, they are taught to be assertive. If you ask a guy a question he almost never says "What about you?" He expects you to just speak up if you have something to say about it, or about yourself. Don't get mad at him or think that he is selfish or uninterested, that would just be silly. Just start talking. If you say something and he blows you off, then you can ask him what's up with that.
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