ConflictedGuy27 Posted October 4, 2010 Posted October 4, 2010 my question is whether or not it makes sense to take myself "off the market" when I just got here... for those that don't know my story, I was with a girl for 9 years, 3 of which were marriage, then I discovered she cheated on me (in Jan 2010) - which I took hard. I tried to reconcile, she wasn't down so I got my act together, divorced her & moved on... Started dating again in May, nothing serious. recently though, I met a really sweet girl who just seems to get me. we're both on the same page, it seems & she told me on Sunday she hasn't felt this way in years. I like her but she's a bit more sprung than I am. don't get me wrong tho, I really like her. & if it matters, yeah, we're in a sexual relationship. In any event, we had "the talk" and I kind of framed things like we shouldn't rush to "classify" things and we should just continue to see where things go organically. she seemed cool with that. in any event, I've been thinking... I like the being single chasing aspect - it's very new to me, as I didn't date around at all in college. just had one girl the whole way through & married her. so here I am, dated for like 6 months, getting to know about 4 girls really well and it seems like I owe it to myself to avoid the girl friend thing. I don't know... it just seems that my life has always included a female companion. is that really what I need; more of the same?? I've learned a lot about myself having been single this short period and my biggest fear is that by agreeing to be her boyfriend, exclusively, I'll somehow short circuit the personal growth trend I've been experiencing these past 6 months. just curious if anybody's been in a simalar situation & how choosing one path over the other turned out. ::last thing - I'm fine being alone. no feelings of lonliness, etc.::
New Again Posted October 4, 2010 Posted October 4, 2010 If you're questioning whether you want to seriously commit to this woman than I doubt you're ready for a relationship, despite how great she is (btw, what the hell does sprung mean?). I've never felt the need to "date around", so I honestly don't understand other people who feel the need to "get it out of their system" - everyone is different, so maybe it's true for you, but I've never really bought that idea myself. I just take things as they come, either I'm hanging out, or dating someone, maybe it works out, maybe it doesn't...but have never felt the way you do.
stillafool Posted October 4, 2010 Posted October 4, 2010 Conflicted Guy I definitely think you should wait to be in a relationship since you apparently feel the same way. Like you said your breakup started in Jan 2010 and it took some time to get over that. You owe it to yourself to play it single for a while. Just continue to be honest with all the girls who want to get serious with you right away.
Author ConflictedGuy27 Posted October 5, 2010 Author Posted October 5, 2010 Conflicted Guy I definitely think you should wait to be in a relationship since you apparently feel the same way. Like you said your breakup started in Jan 2010 and it took some time to get over that. You owe it to yourself to play it single for a while. Just continue to be honest with all the girls who want to get serious with you right away. slept on it & I agree with u Stillafool. as usual, thanks for the sound advice.
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