SadandConfusedWA Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 So guys, my guy (M) called me today to check if I am feeling better He also said that he has "kind of missed me" and asked to see me on BOTH Friday (tomorrow) and Saturday nights. lol I am probably going to go to his place on one of the nights.. We have been dating for month (although this will be our 4th and 5th date only) but he was on vacation and I have been sick soo.... I REALLY want to have sex..Bad idea?
coloredinks Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 So guys, my guy (M) called me today to check if I am feeling better He also said that he has "kind of missed me" and asked to see me on BOTH Friday (tomorrow) and Saturday nights. lol I am probably going to go to his place on one of the nights.. We have been dating for month (although this will be our 4th and 5th date only) but he was on vacation and I have been sick soo.... I REALLY want to have sex..Bad idea? I don't think it's too soon, but I think you should have teh exclusivity chat first or you might end up feeling really uneasy after.
Citizen Erased Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 Considering you're still uncertain about his interest in you, I think it's a bad move. I understand wanting to have sex...but wouldn't you rather being certain about him and where it's going than just getting your rocks off? It's a very good thing though, that he checked how you're feeling.
Awesome Username Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 Considering you're still uncertain about his interest in you, I think it's a bad move. I understand wanting to have sex...but wouldn't you rather being certain about him and where it's going than just getting your rocks off? It's a very good thing though, that he checked how you're feeling. Agreed! Do the exclusive chat first!
JamesM Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 Considering you're still uncertain about his interest in you, I think it's a bad move. I understand wanting to have sex...but wouldn't you rather being certain about him and where it's going than just getting your rocks off? Based on reading your other thread, I agree with CE. Do you know for certain that he is into you as much as you are into him? Rather than planning for it....let things go where they go. If it happens so be it.
sanskrit Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 If you want to do it, do it, if not, don't. It will be a great way to learn more about him. For example, I have a life size "Mini Me" cutout from an Austin Powers movie that I like to put out at the foot of the bed so he is peeking at me and my lady friend when we have sex. I like him to watch what we are doing. Some women don't like this, some don't mind too much, but it's definitely something they learn about me that they didn't know before.
Star Gazer Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 Didn't Shadow start a thread just like this? Where she wanted to have sex but wasn't sure of his interest level? I don't think the 5th date would be too soon, but you MUST establish exclusivity first.
Kamille Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 Yes! Question... Did you send him a text yesterday or did you manage to hold off? Doesn't if feel much better this way? When you let him take the lead and ask you out? That way you have a clear indication he's interested. About the sex... You still lapse into phases of insecurity about this guy. I agree with previous posters. Wait until you feel emotionally safe before sleeping with him. This is more for your own mental well-being than anything else.
Untouchable_Fire Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 So guys, my guy (M) called me today to check if I am feeling better He also said that he has "kind of missed me" and asked to see me on BOTH Friday (tomorrow) and Saturday nights. lol I am probably going to go to his place on one of the nights.. We have been dating for month (although this will be our 4th and 5th date only) but he was on vacation and I have been sick soo.... I REALLY want to have sex..Bad idea? I vote NO! Your just doing this as a manipulation tactic. It won't work!!!
Kamille Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 Clarification. Obviously, I didn't mean yes to the question : good idea to have sex. I meant, Yay, hurray, glad he got in touch, said he missed you and set up two dates. Note... Really, you're free on both Friday and Saturday??? Do you ever make plans ahead with your friends?
Green Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 at the point were women start thinking like this YOU KNOW ITS GOING TO HAPPEn if the guys sniffs it out of her. Tell me is this the older doctor guy who approached you at a bookstore? WOuld it be cool if he tossed ur salad? (sexualy)
Star Gazer Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 Would it be cool if he tossed ur salad? (sexualy) Holy random question!!
CLC2008 Posted September 30, 2010 Posted September 30, 2010 So guys, my guy (M) called me today to check if I am feeling better He also said that he has "kind of missed me" and asked to see me on BOTH Friday (tomorrow) and Saturday nights. lol I am probably going to go to his place on one of the nights.. We have been dating for month (although this will be our 4th and 5th date only) but he was on vacation and I have been sick soo.... I REALLY want to have sex..Bad idea? Just do it, stop being a wuss.
coloredinks Posted October 1, 2010 Posted October 1, 2010 I really don't think you should Ocean. I think things are developing beautifully, and it could screw things up if you sleep with him before you establish exclusivity. You know how guys are...
TaurusTerp Posted October 1, 2010 Posted October 1, 2010 5th date, been a month, and you want to. Whats the problem? Dont let LS get inside your head. Do what feels right. CERTAINLY don't use the exclusivity talk as the threshold for sleeping with him. Are you people ****ing insane?
Allisha Posted October 1, 2010 Posted October 1, 2010 5th date, been a month, and you want to. Whats the problem? Dont let LS get inside your head. Do what feels right. CERTAINLY don't use the exclusivity talk as the threshold for sleeping with him. Are you people ****ing insane? I think you're missing the point. SAC has started a few threads recently about guys she is dating, in which it was established (to me anyway) that she is very insecure and paranoid when it comes to dating and the interest level of men. I think what people are trying to say is that given the insecurity she has, having sex with a guy who is not commited to her has the potential to breed yet more paranoia on her part.
TaurusTerp Posted October 1, 2010 Posted October 1, 2010 I think you're missing the point. SAC has started a few threads recently about guys she is dating, in which it was established (to me anyway) that she is very insecure and paranoid when it comes to dating and the interest level of men. I think what people are trying to say is that given the insecurity she has, having sex with a guy who is not commited to her has the potential to breed yet more paranoia on her part. Well from what I've seen the insecurity and paranoia are present whether or not sex is involved...although I suppose perhaps sex might exacerbate it.
waynebrady Posted October 1, 2010 Posted October 1, 2010 Doesn't if feel much better this way? When you let him take the lead and ask you out? That way you have a clear indication he's interested. He has already asked her out several times it seems, he is obviously intrested. It's just typical female advice of letting the guy take the lead and initiate every date and contact and so on to make shure he is intrested Even though he has already asked the woman out several times and put in all the effort so far, women still feel the need to make the man jump through hoops to get her.
Kamille Posted October 1, 2010 Posted October 1, 2010 He has already asked her out several times it seems, he is obviously intrested. It's just typical female advice of letting the guy take the lead and initiate every date and contact and so on to make shure he is intrested Even though he has already asked the woman out several times and put in all the effort so far, women still feel the need to make the man jump through hoops to get her. Correction wb, SACWA-Ocean has a history of initiating contact with this guy. She doesn't do this because she's thinking about him and wants to let him know she's into him, she does it when she feels insecure and wants reassurance that he's into her. I'm willing to bet I know more about SACWA's situation than you do. I understand your point and agree that this guy has displayed interest by asking her out. Still, my response makes sense for this particular poster. I want her to break a pattern that she has and start accepting that men don't have to display interest when she expects them to do it.
waynebrady Posted October 1, 2010 Posted October 1, 2010 Correction wb, SACWA-Ocean has a history of initiating contact with this guy. She doesn't do this because she's thinking about him and wants to let him know she's into him, she does it when she feels insecure and wants reassurance that he's into her. I'm willing to bet I know more about SACWA's situation than you do. I understand your point and agree that this guy has displayed interest by asking her out. Still, my response makes sense for this particular poster. I want her to break a pattern that she has and start accepting that men don't have to display interest when she expects them to do it. Ok, I admit I don't know her situation but I was speaking more in general. I get annoyed when I see women all the time post the same advice not just for the OP but in other threads, it's always "let the guy do the asking out" "let the guy call/text you" "make him work to get you" and so on, I am a guy and doing that only makes things harder for me and easier for the woman. It's typical female advice.
ComeUndone Posted October 1, 2010 Posted October 1, 2010 WOuld it be cool if he tossed ur salad? (sexualy) Haha, wow I don't think you should sleep with him yet... not until you are sure of his intentions. Once you know you he wants a committed relationship with only you then go ahead. Just make sure you're on the same page because it only takes a little sex for us to get really hooked!
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