JungleLover Posted September 28, 2010 Posted September 28, 2010 I am glad I found this site after looking for some possible answers. I realize many may just be in the dark as much as I am but I guess just hearing some sort of insight may be helpful. I met this woman on an online dating site several weeks or so ago. I am 35 and she is 33 years old. We really clicked right away. Our first date went well and we kissed at the end of it. By the end of the second date, we were having hot, steamy sex. The third date she even brought me a small gift. She wasn’t needy or at all clingy and neither was I. I gave her lots of space and she gave me the same. By the third date, I had met her two children briefly and by the fourth date, I had come over after her kids were asleep and spent the night with her but left in the morning before they woke. Even though we got along well, I knew that she was her online profile was still active and she was still into it but she was always happy to hear from me and every thing was always upbeat when we spoke and we always had a good time on our dates which would end in great sex. We went about about once per week and I would sometimes just stop by her house just for a few minutes about once per week. During our last date, we went to go and see a movie. She seemed a bit more reserved than usual and wasn’t laughing like she used to and seem not as fully engaged as she usually was. She would usually ask me a lot of questions to get to know me better. She did ask me some questions during this date but I could tell that something was different and that I just didn’t see that excitement in her eye. I thought that maybe she wasn’t having as much fun so I decided to try to end the date after we finished watching the movie. As we were leaving, she suggested that we take a walk by the lake by her house for a while before I dropped her off. We talked some more but she somehow seemed a little preoccupied. The whole feeling was sort of awkward for me so I asked her if she was ready to go home and she said yes. I drove her to her house and she told me in her usual end of the date enthusiastic attitude that she had a great time and kissed me in went into her house. She didn’t even invite me into her house which was strange because she always had done this in the past. Matter of fact, she would kiss me passionately, grab my manhood and then ask me if I wanted to come in. That was four days ago. I have called her once on three out of the four past days since then and she has not returned any of my calls even though I didn’t leave a message. I even sent her an email a couple of days ago and she didn’t reply to that. I can see that that she was online these days and I am sure she could see that I was too but I didn’t bother her because I called myself trying to take a hint. I am just confused about how all of this is turning out. It seemed like we had good chemistry, great sex, great conversation and we were getting along very well and having a great time. Things really wasn't moving very fast because I felt that we both were very considerate with giving each other space. It’s just sort of a low blow that she would end things by just all of a sudden ignoring me. Now I understand more than any man that you lose some and you win some but I just don’t understand this one. We never argued, offended each other, had a misunderstanding, or argument or anything. Things seemed perfect. I am just wowed by how I am being ignored after all of this. Even if she found someone else who caught her interest, at this point, I would at least expected to be told something or even receive lame excuses until I gave up on her but I apparently I don’t even deserve lame excuses. I am just ignored. Honestly, I do not know which is worse.
atlnay Posted September 28, 2010 Posted September 28, 2010 OP, how long did you and she correspond online before the date? And how long, from first date to last time you heard from her, have you been together?
Author JungleLover Posted September 28, 2010 Author Posted September 28, 2010 OP, how long did you and she correspond online before the date? And how long, from first date to last time you heard from her, have you been together? We talked for about two weeks online before meeting. We were physically dating for 7 weeks and the last time I heard from her was last Thursday. She has not contacted me at all or replied to any my attempts to contact her. I can deal with her wanting to end it but I think we are way beyond the whole ignoring the person until they go away method. You would think since we were getting along well and she allowed me to sleep over her home with her kids in the house that would at least warrant some sort of contact to end our dating. I am of the thought that if it's has been at least 3 dates or a sexual encounter at least twice, you are out of the ignore them to they are gone realm. If things progressed to either point you have to be a little bit more sophisticated with calling things off but hey, that's just me I guess.
lebbis Posted September 28, 2010 Posted September 28, 2010 One of two things. 1. She still is into you, but is just going through an uncertainty stage which is normal at this point. Be patient and give her a realistic time to have some space. 2. She lost interest and wants to end things. If this is the case you deserve a face to face breakup and an explanation. As a man, you will demand this. The way to reconcile both possibilities, since their courses of action contradict one another, is to give her some space for a bit, contact her, and if she ignores you then, go demand your explanation. Good luck.
Author JungleLover Posted September 28, 2010 Author Posted September 28, 2010 I guess she hit it and quit it. Lol. I guess so but that is ok. I just was a bit surprised the way it was done though. She completely has the right to move on but I do think some courtesy is in order.
Author JungleLover Posted September 28, 2010 Author Posted September 28, 2010 (edited) One of two things. 1. She still is into you, but is just going through an uncertainty stage which is normal at this point. Be patient and give her a realistic time to have some space. 2. She lost interest and wants to end things. If this is the case you deserve a face to face breakup and an explanation. As a man, you will demand this. The way to reconcile both possibilities, since their courses of action contradict one another, is to give her some space for a bit, contact her, and if she ignores you then, go demand your explanation. Good luck. These two are at the opposite end of the spectrum and still puts things in limbo but I will not contact her again for sure. A man just can't help but to wonder what happened. It just seemed to abrupt to be simply a lost of interest. She seem to really be into me. It when on and off like a light switch. Well it's obvious she is not into me now. Edited September 28, 2010 by JungleLover
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