shiftedblue Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 I met this dude in March, immediately liked him, but mostly via facebook, cuz I was in a LTR at the time. My LTR was falling apart for a long time before and after meeting this other guy. I saw the guy in April at a party and hung out and was snugglyish with him but didn't cheat on my LTR significant other. I met the guy for coffee in May, almost June. I broke up with my LTR in July. No contact, am feeling very good about it. At another party recently, I saw the guy, & we were both sort of drunk, and got pretty physical. And he spent the night, and he even like, had his arm around me and all that. Warm fuzzy stuff. This was like a week and a half ago, and now we're having coffee tonight. He's pretty quiet though; he's BUSY as all hell, and doesn't text or call me. But he did make this bit of time for me, so should I assume he actually likes me? He would have canceled or avoided making the coffee date if he didn't, right?
tigressA Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 When you say "got pretty physical", do you mean you had sex? The differentiation between sex and no sex will be pretty big in this situation, so you need to be clearer. If you had sex, then it's highly likely that he just isn't interested in you for any more than that, especially if he doesn't call or text you. To him, you're the girl who he can call up when he wants, on his terms, for some booty. That is it. When was this coffee date arranged?
Author shiftedblue Posted September 27, 2010 Author Posted September 27, 2010 Only oral sex but I see what you're saying. I guess I'll have to gauge the situation tonight over coffee.
Author shiftedblue Posted September 27, 2010 Author Posted September 27, 2010 also, the date was made that morning after he spent the night, so Idk if he made it with me as an "we were physical so I feel I have to see you again at least once" type of thing, or if he genuinely wanted to see me.
tigressA Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 Has he contacted you at all since you arranged the date? And what was the nature of that contact? I have to say that right now it doesn't look too good. I think if he were really interested in you he would've contacted you more, but in your OP you say that he "doesn't call or text you" and that he's "busy as all hell". In reality, "busy" is one of the lamest excuses ever. If someone is really into you, they'll get in touch one way or another. Period. It takes what, 30 seconds to pick up the phone and send a quick text, or call just to say hello.
Philetus Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 When you say "got pretty physical", do you mean you had sex? The differentiation between sex and no sex will be pretty big in this situation, so you need to be clearer. If you had sex, then it's highly likely that he just isn't interested in you for any more than that, especially if he doesn't call or text you. To him, you're the girl who he can call up when he wants, on his terms, for some booty. That is it. When was this coffee date arranged? +1. You know, everybody is busy. I can work 14 hour days at times but I ALWAYS make time for the woman in my life even (especially?) at the very beginning, if I'm interested in more than just hooking up. The "I've been extremely busy" excuse is an old and a good one and I've used it myself.
tigressA Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 +1. You know, everybody is busy. I can work 14 hour days at times but I ALWAYS make time for the woman in my life even (especially?) at the very beginning, if I'm interested in more than just hooking up. The "I've been extremely busy" excuse is an old and a good one and I've used it myself. Bingo. Perfect elaboration on what I said earlier. If a guy is interested in more than hitting and quitting, he does the bolded and underlined. That's what my current guy did. It doesn't sound like your guy is very interested in anything other than a sometime hookup, from the info you've provided.
Author shiftedblue Posted September 28, 2010 Author Posted September 28, 2010 Well the date went awesome, pretty damn sure he likes me now. So I guess we can't always be cynical, now can we? We didn't have sex, no, but what we did do was talk for three hours & then make out. So yeah, there's hope sometimes!
Cee Posted September 28, 2010 Posted September 28, 2010 Well the date went awesome, pretty damn sure he likes me now. So I guess we can't always be cynical, now can we? We didn't have sex, no, but what we did do was talk for three hours & then make out. So yeah, there's hope sometimes! I'm glad your night went well. Using 20/20 hindsight, it sounds like this guy has been into you for awhile, but respected the fact you were in an LTR. Have fun getting to know this guy better.
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