val81 Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 Hi there, I'm new here! I have met a girl many years ago. We've met several times over the years, in parties, or concerts, etc, and every time we did so, we talked alot and it seemed to me that we had a special connection. Every time we met, either she had a boyfriend, or I had a girlfriend (7yrs relationship). Even though I really loved my ex-girlfriend, I've always kept the thought of that girl in a warm place in my mind. Now, a few months ago, when I was about to break-up with my girlfriend, I was walking in the street, and I heard my name. I turned around, and I saw her. Like always, a beautiful and smiling brunette. We talked for a few minutes, I even brought up stuff from the discussion we have had the year before, and she seemed impressed that I still remembered that stuff. She was with 2 or 3 people so I didn't want ask for her number, and one of them (as I would later learn) turned out to be a guy that she is currently dating. So, last week, I went to a show, knowing that the odds of her being there were pretty good since it's one of her favorites bands. Turns out that she's the one recognizing me after the first act. She simply said hi, and that she hoped that we might see each other later, as I was having a beer with 2 pals of mine. After the show, we met again, just outside the venue, and talked a bit, then she said she had to go meet a girlfriend. She asked me and my friend if we wanted to tag along. We did. I chatted with her while enjoying a few pints, and then we left all together on our bikes. She would not give me her number as she said she doesn't like to talk on the phone, but she wanted me to add her on facebook, but I have no facebook account as I think I would spend too much time on that thing and other reasons. On the other hand, when I got home, I added her on Skype by looking up her name. Two days later, I'm back from playing hockey and I'm exhausted, and just when I was gonna hit the sack, she pops on to Skype and says "hello, what are you doing tonight? Wanna go for a movie?" So of course I tell her yeah and I go (I was so exhausted, but I could never say no to such an unexpected opportunity). We watched the movie, which ended around 11pm and I walked her home for about 2 hours. The next day we textskyped a bit and the day after, I invited her to go see a movie we talked about the other day. So we went again. After the movie (which was very disturbing) we went for a pint, talked a bit of our past relations, we did some catch up. Suddenly, she told me that she has been kind of seeing someone for the past 3 months and that she wasn't too sure about that (he's outside the country lately, which explains why he's never around these days) , and that she's been thinking lately of leaving him but did not want to hurt him. Now, she was getting tired after one pint and started to yawn, so we left the bar and I walked her home once more. It was about 30 past midnight when we left, and we walked and talked until we got to her place and kept on talking until it was almost 3am (so much for the yawning). We kissed goodnight(cheeks) and I left. I have been completely obsessed with her in the last few days. I also have to mention that I have experienced a "rebound" (she's aware of that too) since breaking up with my ex-girlfriend. We textskyped again tonight, but it's mostly small talk about movies and work problems and whatnot. I feel like I'm madly in love with her, even though it seems a bit premature at this point. I think she could be the one, and I don't feel I could let her pass this time around. I don't wanna push my agenda too much and I would kind of feel bad for the guy she's seeing. I believe in karma, and I wouldn't want that to come back and haunt me(then again, maybe it's too late for that since it really sounds like I am pursuing her, does it? If her boyfriend was in town, he would probably not allow me to spend so much time in her precious company). I did not let her know how I feel yet, nor did I pull any move (other guy+karma), but she's aware of all the attention I'm giving her since last week. So here are a few questions: Am I on the right track? Should I continue to play it easy and let her settle the situation with her "boyfriend" when he comes back before trying anything? Am I overdoing something or not doing enough? What would you do if you were in my position (apart from this post hehe) Cheers
Green Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 how about kissing her on the lips? She told you she has only been dating the guy 3 months and wants it to end. Why not help bring it to an end.
Author val81 Posted September 23, 2010 Author Posted September 23, 2010 I really want to kiss her on the lips. I just don't want to mess this up by forcing her to leave her BF. I've known her for so long (I just never had a real chance) and I don't wanna miss my turn. I feel for the guy, I don't know him, but again, I don't know how much longer I can stay put.
Green Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 I really want to kiss her on the lips. I just don't want to mess this up by forcing her to leave her BF. I've known her for so long (I just never had a real chance) and I don't wanna miss my turn. I feel for the guy, I don't know him, but again, I don't know how much longer I can stay put. I tell you what, you go ahead and feel for some random guy who hasn't been dating her that long and she wants to break up with. There are plenty of girls who are completly single so just forget this girl if thats how u are. For me I wouldn't care about breaking up a relationshiop where she is obviously only casualy dating him and ready to break up any ways. you are going to "miss your turn" as you put it if you continue this way. I mean you could get lucky but luck would be your only shot because you don't seem to be taking action.
2sure Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 There is no way you can force her to leave her BF. Anyway, they arent married, and are not living together. she has only been "kind of" seeing him for 3 months. She may not want to continue seeing you when her BF gets back into the country. You may be creating drama where there is none...why not just let the dates or friendship continue a natural course, as most do, until there actually is a decision to be made?
Author val81 Posted September 23, 2010 Author Posted September 23, 2010 For me I wouldn't care about breaking up a relationshiop where she is obviously only casualy dating him and ready to break up any ways. you are going to "miss your turn" as you put it if you continue this way. I mean you could get lucky but luck would be your only shot because you don't seem to be taking action. I guess you're right. I really don't want to miss out. I've waited too many years already. There is no way you can force her to leave her BF. Anyway, they arent married, and are not living together. she has only been "kind of" seeing him for 3 months. She may not want to continue seeing you when her BF gets back into the country. You may be creating drama where there is none...why not just let the dates or friendship continue a natural course, as most do, until there actually is a decision to be made? Yeah, I know, I did not express myself correctly (english is my 2nd language) It seems to me that she's really wants to do some more "casual dating" with me before her bf comes back. I guess it might be a good idea to let the natural course of thing take care of business. I was on a similar "emotional high" when I was on the rebound a few months ago. But all that changed when I saw her in the street. That time, just after she left, I thought to myself, wait a minute, I still feel the same as I did years ago for that girl. I ended up seeing this other girl for a few weeks, up until it started to look more serious. I freaked out. All I had in my mind was this girl(the one I'm currently pursuing) and I was certain that I did not want to get into another relationship right away. It kind of ***** for the girl I dated a few weeks, but, I just wasn't in love. I've had the butterflies every day since last week, and every time I see her, it's like if the time would stop. I haven't felt like that for as long as I can remember. V.
Green Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 Listen to this when you get a chance http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMQVDl27iec it will help
LoveAintEverything Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 I would keep doing what you are doing. She clearly likes you and wants to break up with her bf..just go for it!
Green Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 I would keep doing what you are doing. She clearly likes you and wants to break up with her bf..just go for it! I wouldn't say she clearly wants a serious relationship though. But yes her and her current "bf" don't sound like they will last and SHE ASKED YOU OUT! I mean you should asked her out but all you did was look her up on skype and try to get her number... oh and then kiss her on the CHEEK
Author val81 Posted September 23, 2010 Author Posted September 23, 2010 I would keep doing what you are doing. She clearly likes you and wants to break up with her bf..just go for it! Yeah, this sounds like my original plan. Hopefully everything will go accordingly to it! I wouldn't say she clearly wants a serious relationship though. But yes her and her current "bf" don't sound like they will last and SHE ASKED YOU OUT! I mean you should asked her out but all you did was look her up on skype and try to get her number... oh and then kiss her on the CHEEK Yeah, I know the kisses on the cheeks are not very impressive, but we do that a lot here, when we meet & when we leave. I invited her to go out sometime during next week to see a movie, and we are supposed to go out to see a concert soon enough too. I finally got her phone number, that's one step forward, isn't it? I just wanna make sure she wants out with her bf before it gets physical. I'm a bit shy before the ice is broken too.. I don't know her well enough to say that I would like a serious relationship myself just yet. I'd like to take my time too as I'm just moving in with a new roommate and starting a new job next week. It's been almost 3 months since the break-up with my ex, and I'm starting to feel that I could use a little bit of love. Thanks for all the replies btw!
Author val81 Posted September 27, 2010 Author Posted September 27, 2010 Hey you guys! I wanted to thank you for your support and advice! I've made it to 2nd base tonight, and things are looking good! We went out for a few beers, then she gave me a ride back home, we talked for half an hour, and then we made out! You were right about not waiting til she dealt with the "bf" situation. I can finally sleep!
Green Posted September 27, 2010 Posted September 27, 2010 Hey you guys! I wanted to thank you for your support and advice! I've made it to 2nd base tonight, and things are looking good! We went out for a few beers, then she gave me a ride back home, we talked for half an hour, and then we made out! You were right about not waiting til she dealt with the "bf" situation. I can finally sleep! well you have romance now!
Recommended Posts