eerie_reverie Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 Cousins. Bosses. Stepbrothers? Your mom's ex? How about your friends' exes??? Or your ex's friends?? Regarding the last two categories, I truly don't understand why everyone gets their panties up in such a bunch about this. Your exes for a reason. Presumably, you're also friends for a reason, such as because you like doing the same kind of stuff, and enjoy spending time with similar people. Why don't we hear about more of this type of match-making going on? I have attempted it before, with one friend in particular who shares my taste in guys, with varying degrees of success. But it seems like most people view dating your friend's ex, or your ex's friends, as some kind of high treason. If it was a serious relationship, and the breakup wasn't mutual, of course, I understand. It would be hurtful to see him or her happy with anyone. But casual r's, of which most people have plenty on their quest for their soulmate... what's the big deal with letting your friends date those exes? One man's trash is another man's treasure, right??
loverofloveandstuff Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 Yeah I agree. Unless I was gutted by a breakup I wouldn't have a problem with any of my friends dating anyone I've dated. I actually have this one friend (still not quite sure why she does it), but she actively goes out and tries to hit on guys that I've dated/hooked up with in the past (and is always VERY eager to meet guys that I'm currently dating). She even told me it was 'a competition' between us. I was a bit annoyed at the whole prospect that she was trying to compete with me at first, but now I find it funny more than anything. One time she slept with this guy I had dated in the past. She proceeded to tell me the account in great detail, and again and again said, 'He told me I was the best he's ever had.' (Yeah sweetie, that's what he told me too. ) That said and done, she went apesh*t when he didn't want to actually date her. Hit it and quit it. It happens.
Stung Posted September 23, 2010 Posted September 23, 2010 There are relatively few perfectly amicable, emotionless breakups. Even when the breakup isn't dramatic, most people have some lingering feeling for an ex, whether positive or negative, which makes being around them a little challenging--at least for a while. If the ex was hanging around with a close friend, uncomfortable encounters would be almost guaranteed. Added to that, many people would feel awkward about one person having a perfect mental map of what they AND their best friend are like naked, both their sexual techniques, their affectionate pillowtalk. Nobody likes feeling compared, especially when they are the ones who come up wanting. Added to THAT, most people are also a bit territorial about their romantic histories. All that being said, I have fixed exes up with other people before, coworkers, acquaintances--but I don't think I'd feel totally comfortable hooking an ex up with a close friend, if it was a genuine 'ex' and not just somebody I went out with a few times casually, even though I'm very, very over all my former partners.
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